This isn't weird.

Ribs!

"Come on in," Tess said. "Millie's in her room. She's still pretty tired."

It was Sunday. Ben's gut churned with anxiety as he made his way to her room and slowly turned the doorknob. Millie was sitting up in bed. She looked pallid and thin, and more tired than he had ever seen her.

"Ben." She looked up with a faint smile. "You look terrible."

"You look terrible," he shot back, moving to sit near her on the edge of her bed. She punched his arm without conviction; he caught her hand in his before she could pull it away. "I've barely slept. Millie, I'm so sorry," he told her.

"I know," she said softly.

"Tess told me about... I didn't know how bad it was. I knew it was bad, but—I don't know how someone could do that to another person."

"It was a long time ago."

"I should have been there."

"It's okay."

"It's not okay." His voice cracked. Ben turned to her and grabbed her into a hug so tight she could hardly breathe. "I was so scared, Millie. I fucked up so bad and I was so scared that..." His sentence trailed off. She felt hot tears on her shoulder, and gently stroked his hair.

"You're gonna break my ribs, Ben," she whispered. He loosened his grasp, but just barely. "It's really fine. I forgive you, okay? You made an honest mistake. The timing was just bad. I'm not upset at you."

"Are you really okay?" he pressed.

"I'm fine. The doctors gave me some mild sedatives to take for a few days if I need them. They called it post-traumatic stress. Which in my case is pretty much just a fancy way of saying dumb bitch crying over dumb shit."

"Don't." Ben tightened his grip on her again. "Don't talk about my best friend like that."

"Ribs! Okay, okay. Sorry, I just... It's embarrassing for people to see this part of me. I had to talk about it so much these past few days, I'm a little numb. Please don't cry."

Millie pulled back enough to wipe the tears from his cheeks with her thumbs. She rested her forehead against his. "I missed you, Ben. Let me just be happy to see you."

"Fuck, sorry. I'm such a mess," he laughed through a fresh set of tears. "Why am I the one crying?"

"It's okay." She leaned back to pick up a box of tissues from her bedside and offered it to him. He finally let go of her to accept them. "I'd probably be crying, too, if it weren't for the pills."

Ben dried off his face and did his best to concentrate on his breathing until the tears finally stopped.

"I'm tired," Millie said. "Will you lay with me?"

"Of course." Ben took off his shoes and climbed under the covers with her. He laid on his side, looking into her face.

They were silent for a while.

"Have you talked to Genevieve yet?"

"No."

"Do you think she'll forgive you?"

"I don't want her to."

Ben hesitated. "I thought you were in love."

"I thought that too." Another moment of quiet. She closed her eyes. "I've had this... hole inside me, this massive emptiness, for so long. I've spent years trying to fill it. With drugs, with alcohol. Back to back relationships. I haven't been single for longer than a month or two in... years. But it's like... trying to cauterize a stab wound with a cigarette. It can't stop the bleeding." Her eyes opened again. They were wet. "I just need to let myself be alone for a while."

Ben swallowed hard. He wanted desperately to disagree, to beg her to reconsider. He wanted so badly to be the one to save her.

"You'll never be alone," he said instead, running his fingers through her hair. "You've got friends. And we love you. So, so much."

"Thank you," Millie whispered. "That's what I need right now."

Then she kissed his mouth, very softly, and rolled away from him onto her other side before he could even process that it had happened.

Ben put his arms around her, holding her closely from behind. He had never imagined that he could feel so heartbroken and so elated all at once. The cinder block was heavy on his chest. He wanted badly to cry again. Everything was awful and everything was beautiful.

They didn't speak for a long time.

Then she chuckled.

"So.. the waitress, huh?"

Ben groaned. "Oh my god."

"Come on. What a twist. I have to hear that story."

"Jesus Christ... it's so embarrassing."

"Tell me. Pleeeease?"

"I... went to the Tavern on Tuesday, to pick up a camera bag Indigo forgot there last week. You wouldn't believe how fucking packed that place is during lunch."

"Uh-huh."

"Everyone was busy, and I tried to get her help, and as always she was so fucking rude—I kinda just snapped, and... I called her a bitch."

Millie gasped. "To her face?"

"Well, to her back, technically. But she just—burst into tears and ran out."

"Oh my god, Ben. I can't even imagine you losing your temper."

Ben thought back to the party, and how close he had been to hitting Dustin. But he knew Millie wouldn't remember that.

"Yeah, well... I felt like the world's biggest asshole. So I followed her out to apologize, and she just starts pouring out her heart to me about her miserable life. How her husband left, and her mom's dying of cancer, all this fucking tragic shit, and I can't do anything but listen."

"Well, shit."

"Right? Then she like, begs me to get a drink with her, I feel like a monster if I try to say no, so... off we go, to the sleaziest fucking bar I have ever set foot in, and she immediately starts ordering shots. At like, fucking noon. I didn't even realize I didn't have my phone and... it gets real fuzzy pretty soon after that. I must have blacked out pretty early. The next thing I remember is waking up the next afternoon, hungover as all hell, remembering it was Wednesday and freaking the fuck out trying to get ahold of you..."

Millie got quiet.

"But you know what the worst part is?" he asked.

"What?" she responded softly.

"I never even got the fucking camera bag!"

They both burst into giggles, and he hugged her a little tighter.

"So... is she nicer when you get to know her?"

"Shit, not really. Just... really, really sad. I'm a little afraid she's gonna slit her wrists on my doorstep if I keep blowing off her texts."

"Maybe you should just... give her a chance? You never know. It would be such a cute story to tell your grandkids." Millie's voice sounded innocent, but he could sense that she was smirking.

"Please god, don't put that image in my head," Ben pleaded.

"So... what's her name?" she asked.

He paused. "...Fuck."

"Oh my god, Ben! You're such an asshole!"

They laughed together until they were out of breath. It tapered into peaceful silence, and soon he heard her breathing slow as she drifted off to sleep. Ben closed his eyes, and soon he joined her.