Unwanted Seoulmate AMBW

My dearest

" You're broken" She said as she wiped the tear from my face as I continued staring at her.

" Don't say that eomma, it makes me feel like i'm doing something wrong."  I scoffed as I looked around trying to relieve myself of the emotional responses I had lingering on hold.

" You are." She said.

I looked at her for a couple of seconds and sighed. She was not asking any questions. My reflection in her eyes, I looked pitiful from the gaze I gave myself. I quickly smiled in ease. I looked around at the bag I packed for her making sure her medication was on hand. " Eomma.. you're safe. you're going to be safe and that's all that matters."

Her hair had been noticeably faded, her skin slightly deprived of hue. Only a glance sent me back into preparing the bag for her so that I didn't get too lost in the change my mother displayed. She smiled shyly and adjusted my hair as she asked:

" Are you happy to be spending so much time on the run with your mother? are those smiles you're faking as real as you're attempting to make them?" she finally asked. She was aware of my indifference to the situation but still she was also aware of my obtuseness to my own emotions.

" It's okay eomma, You are going to America. You can stay there with your sister."

" Your father-"

" Won't know because you have a new passport. I can't grow if he keeps using you as a hostage against me eomma.." I said as I continued to pack up things for her.

" Who is she?" She asked me.

" What do you mean?"

" There must be a reason or someone you're trying to do all this for."

" I'll tell you after you land in America. That's what our first conversation will be. So just get there safe for me." She caressed my face with her right hand and sighed. While she softly laid her hands on my cheeks I was made aware of the reflection I was avoiding from her eyes once again.

" Eomma.. when you look at me like that I feel sorry towards you. I should've been a stronger son for you."

She gave a closed smile and patted my shoulder.
" I'm proud of you." was all she whispered and we left it there.

One by one as she observed me and the racing thoughts continued in my mind. I wanted nothing more than to react boldly in letting her know the one I fell for was someone too familiar to our family affairs. I couldn't return back to my home so we went to a hotel where I used cash to book and prepare us for the airport.

Making use of a private fight,  I watched as my mother got to the plane accompanied by a nurse and sent to live with her sister giving me the ability to not be used so easily as father would have intended to do. " Don't lose yourself." She said when she kissed my forehead and waved away.

I had purchased five tickets in our name for different flights in the off chance that my father would try to track us that way. The pilot was a friend of my mother so in a more relaxed sense I didn't fear him telling my father he had ahold of my mother. I wouldn't have been surprised either way if father found a way to return my mother.

By the time I'd get home he'd have her tied down on a hospital bed awaiting for me to acknowledge that he indeed worked as a god in this world we were living in. Or have armed men with guns to my aunt's head by the time my mother arrived to the states.

I could only prepare myself for the worst. I took a bus back towards my hotel. Moved and changed locations for the second night. I took refuge on Juju island for a moment a day or two before heading back into seoul. I hadn't heard from my fiancé. I wasn't shocked that she hadn't attempted to contact me. Turning on my phone to check the log, my father left all the calls he could about being disappointed in having someone like me as a son.