Destiny Altered (READ DISCLAIMER)

6 - What the Doctor Saw

A quick soak of my arms in some water later, and my wrists looked good as new. But there was some lingering sensation that I couldn't quite put my finger on. I've only been burned one other time, and that was by Aang. This felt completely different though. Shaking my head, I headed into Lazu's office.

"How are your wrists?" he asked, peering over his glasses, genuine concern on his face.

"They're fine now. The burns weren't too bad." I held my hands up. "See?"

"Amazing." He smiled. "You know, firebenders once had a healing modality as well. But it's an art that's been lost for at least a hundred years if not more. Like waterbenders, not every firebender had the ability to heal. The feeling now is, even if a firebender were to show some capacity for that ability, there's no one they can learn from. Master teachers know that it once existed, but the lineage has died out."

"That's a shame," I replied. It truly was. "I wonder how fire could heal when it seems so destructive."

Lazu looked at me with a quizzical expression. "You know, the Princess asked you a very similar question today."

I had completely forgotten that all my interactions with Azula were under observation. Feeling a little self conscious at that realization, I recalled being asked the same question about water. "I remember now. But water and fire aren't the same. They are opposite elements. Fire is quick, offensive, and destructive. Water is graceful, defensive, and can both restore and destroy."

"You know, Katara, even though water is fire's opposite, there are a few similarities between waterbending and firebending. Both require inner discipline and a connection to external forces of either the sun or the moon. And they both have the capacity for destruction and for healing."

"I just don't see how. Fire burns. It scars," I countered, thinking of Zuko.

"There are different types of fire that benders can generate, as I'm sure you have seen in your travels. But not all of it produces a flame. Fire can envelope you with warmth without burning you."

"How do you know all this?"

"When I was younger, I had natural talent as a firebender. As I'm sure you know, firebending is driven by a strong desire and will. My passion for the art was driven by a need to help people. I sought out a firebending teacher, and he started me out with breathing exercises. They were wonderful. I was able to generate a lot of inner fire. But then my teacher taught me to channel it into attacks. And I began to lose my drive, because I never wanted to use my bending ability for that purpose.

"Katara, I am one of those benders who has tuned into the healing aspect of fire. For years I searched for a master who could teach me what I desperately sought to learn. During that time, I learned that the art had died out long ago. So I've only been able to use my inner fire to occasionally do some simple healing on myself."

"Lazu, that is amazing. It's too bad that you were never able to develop your healing further. Isn't there someway you could figure it out on your own?"

"Fire is power. Therefore it's dangerous to work beyond your capacity without guidance from a master. I could end up doing more harm than good." He had a good point. I remembered when Aang was studying with Jeong Jeong, and that was exactly what had happened. Aang didn't listen to his teacher, went beyond his capacity, and lost control of his firebending.

"I see your point. I'm sorry you weren't able to learn what you were seeking."

"It's alright, Katara. The work I've been able to do as a doctor has been rewarding. Although I don't have the same skill set you do, I am quite proficient in traditional medicine."

"Does being a master of traditional medicine include understanding how to heal the mind and spirit?"

"A bit, but that's really more of a specialty of Zee and Chan."

"Then what are you doing working here?"

"Didn't Fire Lord Zuko tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"I used to be the royal doctor. Until Princess Azula banished me, that is," he said with a wry smile.

"So you know the Princess?"

"Better than most." He had a sad expression on his face. "The Fire Lord asked if I was willing to oversee his sister's care here because of that. I may not be an expert in the field, but I know enough. And most importantly, I've known Princess Azula almost her entire life. I know what she's been through."

"What do you mean?"

"The scars she bears are deeper than the skin," he said a bit cryptically. I gave him a look indicating that I didn't understand what he meant. "I'm sorry, that's all I can say for now, Katara. There's a reason the princess won't talk to me. She knows that I know about things that happened in her past, and she's not ready to face those things just yet. She at least has communicated with you, even if it's been somewhat unpleasant. I know you mean well, but if I tell you everything I know about her, we could risk any chance we have of gaining her trust. And we need her to trust us if she's going to get better. You saw the way she reacted today when you mentioned her mother. What if you inadvertently said something else, something she doesn't think anyone else knows."

"I understand, Lazu." I did understand his reasoning. But it set off a wild amount of speculation in my mind. What secrets was he keeping?

-0-0-0-

Later that evening, I could still feel some residual effects where Azula had burned me. It wasn't a bad feeling and there wasn't any pain. It just felt warm, like an imprint had been left behind, even though my skin looked fine. I've been around some pretty powerful benders in my time, but none have had this kind of effect on me. Yet another mystery about Azula that would probably take some time to unravel, just like everything else involving her.

I wondered about tomorrow. What kind of condition would the princess be in? Would I be able to get through, or would she shut me out like she did Lazu? While I had suspected that her feelings toward her mother had something to do with her nervous breakdown, I didn't think the mere mention of her mother would set her off like it did today.

I didn't understand it. In the few times that Zuko had mentioned Ursa, he showed genuine sadness at not having her in his life. He missed her. Azula's relationship with her must have been strained to say the least. But to bring about such rage? What could have possibly caused that amount of anger in the first place?

No answers would be coming from Lazu anytime soon, that was for sure. For now, I was left to guess and hope that eventually I would figure it out. More immediate was getting Azula to open up about her past, even if it wasn't to me. Otherwise, healing could never truly take place.