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The Cabin

I turn my back towards Zoey and as I start to walk I realize that I have no transportation since Addy left. I sit on the sidewalk of Westing-Ton Park and I start to find tears rolling down my cheeks.

Is that why I don't fit in?

Is it because I took the blame for Addison's doing?

I had to do it! Her parents would've killed her if I let her take the blame!

More tears streamed down my face as I thought to myself. I need a cut.

*RING RING*

My phone reads, Jerrica Angelis.

Me: He-hello

My voice cracks as I'm trying to wipe away my tears.

Jerrica: Hey little sis! I felt like I haven't seen you in forever! I miss you so much!

She says in a baby voice.

Me: oh yeah..I forgot that you were back in town..

Jerrica: Wow. I can hear your excitement over telephone.

Jerrica said sarcastically

Me: Sorry, I've just been really stressed lately..

Jerrica: That's why I called you! I'm taking a trip to the mountains with my girls and I wanted you to come!

Fuck.

Me: I don't think that's such a good idea..I have school the rest of the week still.

Jerrica: I already called your school and now you have mad cow disease! So yeah..

Are you fucking kidding me?!

Your friends hate me and think that I'm some depressed freak that murders people?! How am I gonna deal with that for the rest of the week!?

Jerrica: Umm, Faith? You still there? She chuckles

Me: oh yeah, do I really have a choice?

Jerrica: Nope! I'll be there in two hours so start packing!

She hangs up before I could tell her that I don't have a ride. Well this is great! Might as well start walking.

As I'm walking I think about Colin so I check my kik messages.

Colin- je vous aime vraiment, je veux aller te voir...

I really like you, I want to see you...

Omg, are you serious?! This is the best thing that has happen to me all day..wait. This was in the morning? He's been waiting for a reply this entire time?! He probably thinks that I don't like him and I just flaked!

Me- Colin?

Me- are you there?

Me- I'm so sorry, someone took my phone. Please answer.

He's not responding!? the text is not even sending through.

Me- umm here's my number, (623)-***-*** call me when you get the chance.

As I type I realize that I came to a stop at my house so I run inside and I knocked into the living room table and created a loud bang

"what the fuck was that noise?!"

I hear my mother raise from her nap

"Sorry mom, I just knocked into something"

I say in worry but hear no reply, so I run upstairs and start packing. I pack away while constantly checking my phone for miss calls, and still no miss calls.

*knock knock*

I run down stairs and walk towards the door with all of my bags.

"Hey, Faithy poo!" Jerrica says as she squeezes the crap out of me.

Me- "hey..."

Jerrica: "well than, we should start heading out to the cabin!!"

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A VERY LONG ROAD TRIP WITH FAN-GIRLING JERRICA AND NO NEW CALLS

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"We're finally here!!" Jerrica exclaims in excitement. Jerrica runs out of the car with ALL of our bags. (she's surprisingly strong) Her friends immediately hear her squeal so they all run out the door.

"Omg, you are FINALLY here!!" They all say in unison, how stereotypical.

"Wait..why did you bring IT with you?" Jillian whispers loudly over my sisters shoulder, and seriously has she been hanging with Zoe?!

"HEY, you do NOT call my sister that EVER!" Jerrica lectures Jillian.

The space fills with silence and her group of friends enter the cabin, including Jerrica and I following ahead.

We walk into the cabin and all of the girls try there best to exclude me. I never fit in with Jerrica's friends, she's so pretty and I'm just..not. She's so popular and outgoing and I'm shy and I exclude people. I'm completely different from her. I walk into an empty room and take out my journal. I flip to my unfinished poem and start finishing, the title is 'What Do I see?' Some day I hope that I can share my feelings on some sort of anonymous blog site.. Has Colin text back yet? I reach for my pocket... not in the right pocket.. or the left?! I think I left my phone in the car. pfft that's the first.

I secretly grab the keys from Jerrica's pocket while she socializes. I walk out the door and reach for my phone and no new messages or calls. I glumly walk back inside the cabin

"What Do I See?

I look in the mirror

and what do I see?

A coward, stupidity

It's hardly a she.

I drive to school

and what do I see?

A shy, a lonely

yep, that's me.

I look at my wrist

and what do I see?

A selfish, an ugly

Someone I cannot be.

I pick up the blade

and what do I see?

I see the key,

the key to me."

Jerrica read my poem to the entire cabin of girls while I sit there frozen and in shock. I don't know what to say... How could she do this? Why cant everyone just leave me alone.

"Wow, You are such an attention whore Faith!" Jillian gawks while everyone laughs.

"I can't believe you did this! you're my sister, you..you bitch!" I yell out in disbelief.

"Wait Faith! It was a dare!" Jerrica cries out in desperation.

I run up the spiral stares and go to the nearest bathroom and immediately start bawling. I need to cut. I find the sharpest thing in room and slide it against my wrist. I cry out in pain but I deserve it. I cant anymore.

* RING RING *

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For this chapter I used exactly 1,000 words for the new high score of 1,000 views on my book! I hope you like this chapter and it would help if you commented feedback. All credit for the poem goes to me. Thank you for everyone that stuck with me and this book, love you!

~_depressed_disney_