It's Complicated

Inbetween days

Quantico , Virginia, 2004.

I found myself, lying in bed. Hoping to fall asleep before I fall apart.

Harry already packed up all his things and left to stay at a friends house.

The clock on my bedside table says it's 3:00 in the morning, I should be waking up in 2 hours.

I rang Evan to tell him about the break and abortion but he didn't answer so I'm going to have to wait for that call.

Ringing Spencer became extremely tempting and I knew deep down that there is a chance he could still be awake reading.

Ring ....ring...

"Aoife? What are you doing awake?" A very pretty sleep voice answered the call.

"I told Harry."

"Did he not take it well?"

"Uhhhh....he slapped me....twice" I whispered into the phone as if Harry was going to hear me somehow.

"Oh Aoife, are you okay?" Spencer exclaimed from the other line causing me to distance my phone from my ear.

"It's okay, he's ill. He didn't mean to, I feel bad for him really."

"Uh..what? Ill?"

" he has Intermittent explosive disorder, probably didn't take his medication. He can't control it, you know?"

"That's not really an excuse for his behavior, Aoife."

Silence.

"He moved out."

"Isn't that a good thing?"

"Yes. It is. Hey, why are you still up"

"Reading"

"What book"

"The theory of everything"

"No way, I love that book" I chuckled.

"Yeah, you suggested it"

Spencer and I talked for one hour and 24 minutes, then he suggested that we should get a half a hour sleep.

It was cold this morning, so I wrapped myself up in one of my favorite Burberry coats that my
foster mother got me for my 17 birthday.

I decided last night to take Hotch up on his offer of working with the BAU. I didn't want to ring him at 3 in the morning so I decided to ring him today because Spencer they don't have any case today.

I made my way to my desk and sat down. I starred at the black phone completing weightier I should ring him now or not.

A pit of anxiety grew in my stomach as I typed his office number.

Ring...ring..ring...ring

"Agent hotchner speaking"

"Yeah,hi hotch i-"

"Oh hello Aoife"

"I was wondering if that job offer still stands?"

"Yes of course, it's all yours"

"That's great because I think I might take you up on that"

A week  later I started my job with the behavioral analysis unit. Penelope brought me a big bouquet of my favorite flowers, tulips in all different colors and handed it to me the second the lift doors opened.

It's been a week since then and we haven't got a case yet, the paperwork was really confusing at the beginning but Spencer helped me through it over and over again.

Halloween is soon so I'm currently doing my last minute brain storming for my costume.
Everything just seems so lame and that it's already been done before or it just seems like no one will understand who I am.

At 5 O clock today is my appointment at the abortion clinic. I know I'm doing the sensible thing but I can't help but feel guilty. Harrys harsh words really took a tole on me. I don't want to be like my dad in anyway.

There is a tiny baby bump now but I don't think that anyone actually noticed, I hope.

When I walked over to Spencer's desk he was playing chess, like always. "I've never seen someone have such a intense match with themselves before" I joked leaning against his desk.

"Then you haven't been watching the right chess players" Spencer commented, not looking up from the board causing Derek from behind him and I to laugh.

"I doubt Aoife watches any chess players" Derek joined our conversation with his player smile like always.

"You don't know that, I used to actually be a professional chess player" my brother and I used to play chess all the time, he beat me at it over and over again but after time I started winning.

"No you weren't"

"I don't know Spencer, she was probably a underground prodigy" Derek backed me up, continuing the joke that Spencer didn't seem to notice.

Penelope decided to join our conversation then.
"Well my little bunnies, I think that the only way to find out is a chess match"

"Agreed, but Spencer and I are going to go the library now-"

"What-"

"Cmon, let's go" i took his hand with a fake smile and a roll of my eyes and led him to the elevator.

When we got in the elevator I turned to Spencer with a stern look. "Do you not remember what's today? aren't you meant to have a eidetic memory?"

He must've only realized now because his eyes wised x10. "Oh, Aoife. I'm so so sorry. I forgot..And eidetic memory is remembering more images and words on paper than when people tell you things"

"Whatever. Let's just get this done and over with."

We rode in his car and it was a quiet drive. When we got there neither of us got out. "Spencer..?"

"Yes, Aoife"

" if I do this...am I a murder?"

"What?!" Spencer laughed at my genuine question making me feel sort of dumb. "Of course you won't be , Aoife"

"Okay, yeah, okay. Let's do this"

We walked into the clinic and sat down next to each other on the squeaky cheap plastic chairs.

"Aoife Doyle, we are ready for you now" a woman from the reception desk called.

Spencer wasn't allowed to go in with me so I had to go in on my own. Which was actually not bad, everyone was really nice and I did exactly what I said I would do: get it over and done with.