Affair to Remember

Twenty Four

Demi

It's been nearly 2 weeks since Jesse took me away and we've only seen each other a handful of times. Wilmer hadn't been called away for work so Jesse and I had to sneak around. It made seeing each other a lot harder, especially when he became busier with his new restaurant in San Diego. Not seeing him made me sort of miserable. Thankfully Wilmer never actually noticed a major difference in my mood, he just assumed I was on my period which actually upset him.

"We'll get that baby one day" he'd commented as he wrapped his arms around me from behind and lightly caressed my stomach. It made the guilt flood my heart. I'm the reason he isn't getting that baby he so desperately wants.

"I'm sorry" for everything. I have tried to think of how I'm going to end my marriage but every time I do, it just makes the guilt ten times worse. I promised him, I vowed to him that I would be with him till death did us part, not until another man came along. It makes my heart sting every time he's so loving.

"It isn't your fault, Nena" if only you knew.

The next week consisted of me trying to get some writing done but my attempts were never that successful. They always seemed to end in me daydreaming about Jesse. It didn't help that the characters in my book were heavily based on us.

"Baby?" I turned to Wilmer as he stepped into the living room, an almost sorry look on his face.

"You okay?" I slowly closed the lid of my laptop as he walked towards me. "Wil?" he took a seat on the couch beside me.

"I-I thought they'd stopped asking me to go away for work but I've just been asked if I can go to Dallas for the week" I released the breath I hadn't even realised I was holding. "I'm really sorry" I shook my head as I leant to kiss his cheek. I had to contain my smile because this meant that Jesse and I could finally spend some alone time together without being fearful that we'd get caught. "I fly out tomorrow. I'll get back late Friday" I nodded, trying to act like this upset me.

"You don't need to be sorry. You've gotta go where work want you" I commented as I slid my fingers through his hair.

"I hate all this travelling. It never used to involve this" he pressed a soft kiss to my cheek. "How about we have a date night? I want you in your best outfit, we can go out for dinner" I didn't have the heart to reject him so I nodded.

We went out for dinner and it actually reminded me of what our relationship used to be like. I can't say it's changed the fact I don't love him anymore though. As I watched him, it made me realise more that I need to let him go sooner rather than later. I don't want to keep leading this man on. I didn't have the heart to do it that night though so I kept up the charade for the rest of the night, even as my heart broke. Even the sex seemed different, it was more loving than it ever used to be. He still never brought me close to a climax though. The sex didn't compare to anything that Jesse and I have, and I know that relationships aren't all about sex but my connection with Jesse seems so much stronger.

I watched from the porch as Wilmer lifted his suitcase into the back of the cab. I kept the blanket wrapped around me. He began back up towards me, sliding his hand along my cheek as he leant to softly peck my lips.

"I love you, Nena. I'll see you Friday" I nodded, swallowing over the lump that formed in my throat because of the guilt I felt for not feeling sad about him leaving. I don't even think I'll miss him and that hurts me more. I wish I could force myself to miss him. I kind of wish this wasn't my life. "I love you."

"Love you too" he pecked my lips one final time and then turned to leave. A single tear rolled down my cheek as I watched the cab drive down the street. I rapidly began to blink as I glanced to Jesse's driveway. I wasn't surprised to find that his car wasn't in the driveway, he's been spending a lot of time in San Diego lately.

I turned to step back into the house, softly closing the door behind me. I headed into the living room and I dropped down onto the couch, pulling my laptop towards me. I grabbed my phone off the arm of the couch, hesitating for a moment before I finally typed out a message to Jesse.

Me: I've got the week free. There's no need to sneak around! You free at all? 😝🙂

I lowered my phone onto the arm of the couch, trying to focus back on my laptop as I anxiously waited for his reply. All I could manage was a sentence, my mind was very quickly taken over by thoughts of Jesse. He made it difficult to concentrate. I bit down on my lip as my lower region reacted at the very thought of him. I slammed my laptop shut and groaned as I tangled my fingers in my hair. My heart jumped as my phone notified me of a text.

Jesse: I'm in San Diego for the week angel! I'm sorry.

My heart sunk into my stomach as I slumped further back into the couch. I grabbed the blanket off the back and draped it over my legs as I curled into myself.

Me: That sucks. I miss you 😔💔

I began to bite down on my lip as I read through our most recent messages. We haven't seen each other over the last few days. I've never missed someone as much as I miss Jesse.

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