Read to me ~ Xingyun

11

TW// Anger outburst, mental breakdown, blood and a little bit of gore?

Chongyun POV:

I really fucked that up.

'You're my best friend' what in the name of the seven was I thinking?

I had the biggest opportunity to tell him that I loved him, to make him smile, to hold his little body in my lap for the rest of the day,

But I didnt.

I said he is my best friend. And now he's dissapeared to rex lapis knows where and I don't know what to do.

I'm a coward.

I'm a fucking coward.

I cant even complete the simple task of making someone feel better.

No I can't even tell him I love him.

I'm a FUCKING faliure.

I could feel my temperature rising and my anger getting out of control,

First I fuck up with Xingqiu and now my anger issues are showing up?!

What the fuck is wrong with me?!!

I didnt have a popsicle on me, oh shit.

I stood up and clenched my fists, I needed to hit something, I needed to scream, I needed to let my anger out somehow, I hadn't been this mad at myself since I gave up on finding spirits.

I had to go somewhere where I could let out my anger unseen, I ran downstairs and out the door, and then I ran all the way to the forest, tears spilling from my eyes, the second I got deep enough into the forest I screamed in frustration and punched a tree,

My fist was bleeding and my cheeks were red,

I continuously punched the tree, letting out all my frustration until I was too tired to move anymore, I lay there against the beaten up tree, fists bloody, tears spilling from my eyes and little sobs leaving my mouth, I hated this.

I hate this.

I hate it so so so much.

"Y-yun yun?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Xingqiu POV:

I washed my face and then stood up to go back to my room, but as I opened the kitchen door I saw Chongyun run out the front door.

Oh.

But something was telling me to follow him, something was telling me not to let him go, I didn't want to lose him, he said he would never leave me! Why was he leaving,

Before I could think anymore I found myself chasing after the blue haired boy, he hadn't noticed considering he was quite alot faster than me but I still managed to see where he went, he went into the forest.

I made it to the forest to see Chongyun in a horrifying state, he was sitting by a beaten up tree with bloody fists and tears all down his face,

I stood in shock for a moment, my heart cracking a little more at the sight of him like this,

"Y-yun yun?" My mouth seemed to talk before I could think,

He looked at me and instantly his expression went from angry to soft and apologetic,

His face was so pretty, even like this..

He quickly stood up and ran over to me pulling me into a hug,

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it like that, I don't love you like a friend, I love you so much more than that! I'm sorry I was too much of a coward to tell you and- and I'm sorry I upset you!" He spoke, nuzzling his face in my shoulder,