Did You Come To Stare Or Wash Away The Blood? (My Chemical Romance Fanfic)

You Are Not A Diamond, You Are Not A Shining Star Doesnt Mean That You're Not Pe

Title from You Are Not by Young Guns  

Chapter 17- You Are Not A Diamond, You Are Not A Shining Star Doesnt Mean That You're Not Perfect Exactly As You Are

Elena's POV

Ray called me from outside in the 'bedroom' forcing me to leave Lewis and the feeling of pure ecstasy that came from his soft touch. I begrudgingly opened the door to a smiling Ray who gestured for me to come outside, which I did. I walked away from the smal white room leaving Lewis in there on his own and followed Ray through the tour bus and out of the door. Frank smiled at me as we walked passed. Ray held the door open as I walked outside then let it slam to a close. We went and sat down on the side of the road next to the tour bus. It was a few minutes of sitting there watching the world pass us by before either of us started to talk, it was a comfortable silence and neither of us felt like breaking it but Ray knew he had to.

"Elena," He began "We're worried about you," Ray muttered as if he was scared I would get annoyed if the guys were being too over protective.  

"There's nothing to be worried about, I'm fine," I almost snapped at him causing Ray to flinch slightly. This in turn resulted in me looking down to the floor as a way to avoid eye contact.  

"You don't seem fine," Ray said to me placing his strong arm around my shoulders. "You can tell me anything Elena, I promise not to tell the others," I looked into Ray's deep brown eyes and saw that he was being honest, that was all I needed.

"I'm scared Ray," I told him truthfully. 

"Scared of what?" He inquired. 

"Scared of everything," I sighed before continuing. "I'm scared of going back to social services, I'm scared of going to America. I'm scared of Alicia not accepting me, I'm scared of losing Lewis and Jaimie. I'm scared of the fans hating me, I'm scared of everything going back to how it used to be," I paused again to catch my breath. "But most of all I'm scared of hurting you guys somehow and being the reason for the demise of My Chemical Romance. That's something that I could never live with myself after," I struggled to keep my tears at bay as Ray hugged me tighter against him. "My Chemical Romance has led the way for so many teenagers and helped them become who they are today. You are still doing that, there are so many other people who need the help and support that you guys have to offer and if that stopped I don't know what would happen," Ray attempted to stop me from speaking but I wouldn't let him, I had to finish. "We all know one day that My Chemical Romance will have to end, maybe one of you will die or maybe you just become to old and ill to perform anymore. I can't imagine that happening but I know it will one day, more than likely in my lifetime. So I know My Chemical Romance can't last forever but if you guys stopped doing what you love because of problems I cause then I'd probably die inside," I looked up into Ray's eyes to see them filled with sorrow. "Music has kept me alive for so long, it is not just sounds to me anymore. Music is my life force there would be nothing left to live for if I destroyed it," I finished telling Ray my worries before breaking down completely. He held me tight against his warm chest, I could hear the rhythmic beat of his heart. The regular tune calmed my over active mind and lulled the tears streaming down my face.  

After a few minutes I pulled away from Ray's now tear soaked shirt. I mumbled an apology as we got to our feet but Ray just pulled me into another hug.  

"I'm here if you ever need to talk Elena. I know it can sometimes be hard to talk to Mikey and Gerard especially now you know you're related to them and Frank can be a bit childish. Please just remember we are here for you," We pulled apart from the embrace.  

"Ray can you promise me something?" I asked him resulting in nod. "Please don't tell Mikey and Gerard. You can tell Frank but just please not the other two. I don't want them to worry too much or do anything that will ruin their relationships,"  

"I promise you that Elena. You're part of my family now and I'll always do whatever I can for you no matter what happens," He told me before picking me up by the waist and running back to the bus.

We entered the bus and Ray threw me onto the sofa before starting to tickle me causing the fit of laughter which lasted for a few minutes. Mikey shook his head at the sight of us, Gerard and Jaimie were grinning and Frank was no where to be seen. I looked back towards the door to the bedroom guessing that's where Frank would be seeing as he rarely made coffee.  

"He's talking to Jamia to check on.the twins," Gerard told me with a smile as Ray sat next to me on the sofa still chuckling. "So, what did the two of you talk about out there?" Gerard inquired.  

"Oh nothing really, I was just making sure Elena was okay with staying in this dump for a while longer," Ray replied gesturing to the tour bus we were currently living in.  

"It'll only be three more days and then we will get a hotel somewhere for when we sort everything with you moving back to the US with us," Mikey said and I just nodded.

We sat in a somewhat awkward silence until Frank and Jaimie walked into the room. That was weird, I mean what are the chances of them walking into the same room at the same time? Frank also brought his signature Phant-O-Matic guitar with him. Connecting it up to the small Marshal amp that they had behind one of the sofas Frank began to play one of my all time favourite songs Burn Out by Green Day. Frank and I began to sing before the others joined in. I gotta admit, we sounded pretty awesome. This carried on for a while longer before we gave up and came to the problem we had been avoiding. How were we going to get Lewis home?