Double The Trouble

Chapter 22

Lilyana

There was a soft knock at my bedroom door, I groaned internally, hopping they'd just go away. There was another knock telling me that I wasn't that lucky and that whoever was at my door was very persistent.  

"What do you want!" I irritatingly growled.

"Can I come in?" I rolled my eyes, what did she want? I turned over in my bed, my back now facing the door. "Lilyana...please?""

Go away!" I cried out. 

"I just want to talk to you, just let me in please." I sighed, rolling out of bed. I walked towards the door, hesitantly I reached for the lock, slowly turning it.

"Yes?" I groaned. I stared into her perfect features, every second that I looked into her gorgeous grayish brown orbs I was drawn deeper into her nothingness. I couldn't tear my gaze away from her, she looked like everything I needed to overcome and everything I wanted to be, all wrapped into one stunning paradox. I could see in her eyes, she was so strong, yet so troubled, I wanted to know her, but I needed to hate her. 

"Can we talk... please?" she bit her lip awkwardly. 

"Sure.." I reluctantly, opened up my door, allowing her to enter my room. "What could you possibly want to talk about?" I asked rudely, 

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked calmly, as if my harsh words meant nothing to her, 

"You don't even know me, what could you want to talk to me about." I spit coldly, and yet again she ignored me like water rolling off a rain coat. 

"I know what it's like to grow up without a mom. I know what it's like to feel like Demi is your savior, like she is your real mom. I know what pain feels like, and I know exactly how you felt down there; possessive, hurt, enraged, inferior, but mostly pissed that you couldn't do a thing about it." She stepped closer to me, willingly I stayed put. "How you ask?" I nodded slowly. "I was there before, with Demi.." 

"Wh-what was yours?" I couldn't lie, I was intimidated by her, by this sweetheart, by this beautiful or should I say my beautiful aunt... "My sister was on your mom's back." She started off the story walking towards the desk near my bed. taking a seat, I soon followed her taking a seat on the bed near her. "Her name's Victoria, you didn't meet her down there. I was going through some things internally, a lot actually..." she faded out staring off into the distance which was really just my powered off tv. I waved my hand in her face. "Oh I'm so sorry," she cleared her throat. "I'd been crying all day, my father had just rocked me to sleep, I woke up for a drink of water, I was on my way back to his room and in comes Demi... wait for it... with Victoria on her back." I shot her a blank stare. Her laughter overtook the room, she sounded just like mom, damn they really are sisters. "I know it seems petty and small but I felt like that was the only place in the entire world that belonged to me and only me. As I said.. I was going through a lot." I was confused.

"Like what?" I inquired. 

"That's pretty personal question to answer for a person that hates you." Her face was torn, for the first time all day she was failing at hiding her feelings. 

"I-I don't hate you. You-you're perfect, I'm sc-scared of you." She pulled me onto her lap like my mom would do. 

"I'm far from perfect baby.. you have to understand that." She hugged me tightly, I buried my head in her stomach, as I heard her wince. "I-" I cut her off, with a desperate gaze. I pressed my fingers slightly into her inner thighs and lower abdomen, causing her to flinch. "You can't tell your mom!" She panicked. "Please?" Tears filled her eyes. 

"As long as you promise to never snitch on me," her fingers wandered to my hip, where she felt my swollen gash. "Promise?" I looked deeply in her eyes, she was so young, so troubled, so hurt, and I was taking advantage of her. 

"I-I" shaking her head, fighting internally. "I promise." 

"Can I-can I know why?" I pushed further.

"Years and years of abuse. abandonment... self hatred, mom-mommy issue-ss, and never being able to see my-my self worth." She whispered slowly. I nodded in agreement. We had a deep connection, I felt like I could trust her, and that was rare. 

"What do you mean mommy issues?" I pried deeper, I wanted to know her before I bared my soul to her. 

"I was born and raised in Miami FL, not really, but South Florida. And as you probably know, your mom is a Texan chick to the bone." She silently chuckled. "My mom, left my dad when I was two, the day after I turned two, because he was an abusive mentally ill drunk. But she left me with him, 13 years I was without a mother, 13 years I lived in hell. I hated her, I hated that woman for leaving me and never coming for me. I hated myself more for being so leave-able." I placed my hand on her cheek for comfort. 

I guess it was my turn.

Demi

"Maybe I should go check on her??" I paced around the living room. 

"No, she's fine Demi. She's with Chelsea. What's the worst thing that could possibly happen?" Dallas asked. 

"I-I don't know."

"They can relate Dem, maybe this could be good for the both of them." Dallas reassured me, placing her hand on the small of my back. "In my eyes, Chelsea needs this, you know she's in recovery. She needs someone to confide in. She has no one."

"Don't you ever say that, Chelsea has always had me! She always will." I defensively responded.

"God dammit Demi. You two are just alike. You have not one but two precious kids to look over, they are yours, she will never see you as a person to come to again, no matter how available you are." Frustration evident in my older sister's voice. "She may look like a copy of me, but on the inside she is a replica of you." She shook her head. "I'm sure when it's three o'clock in the morning and she's having a panic attack so bad she can't breathe, her chests closing, tears clogging her vision, bloody razor in her hand as her blood pours out of her veins onto the cold tiled floor, she still won't call you because she's more worried about you losing a wink of sleep then losing her own life. And that's our sister." I wiped a tear falling on my cheek with the palm of my hand. It hurt to know the truth, there was no denying it, because that was exactly what I had done to Dallas.

-

Boring chapter :(

Honestly wrote this to fill in anyone who has never read 'Can I Call This My Home?' 

I haven't updated in like a month, I have my reasons, testing, job hunting, fan in my laptop broke, family issues, wishing I was dead, v v depressed it was hard to write. 

But more is coming soon. Better updates at that, are soon to come.