Amoung the prayer flags

Much love 7

Dearest darling Yeshe As my belly swelled with our second child our coupling style had to change slightly. You had to enter me from behind whenever couple so not to hurt the child. When I woke up you had  kissed me and I had to turn to return the affection.  But I refused so I turned around and we kissed face to face as we embraced. I felt you rub yourself against my womanhood as to not to enter me. I stroked, petting your head as we kissed.  I was surprised that some of your mature age was still able to produce. As we coupled you traced the shape of my womanhood with member carefull trying not to penitrate me.  I felt nothing a thing except for pleasure.  You were driving me insane, so I spread my legs in a split and you massaged and kissed my inner legs, thighs and womanhood with your mouth and tounge.  I moaned loudly as if I was being murdered. That woke up a two year old Poppy and she walked in. I did realize until the wash of pleasure went away and I opened my eyes. I put a gown on and rushed her out of the room.  Poppy wasn't even afraid but laughing.  "Come with me my little flower," I said trying not be embraced. Though I knew she wasn't ignorant.  When I left her with the caretaker she described everything she saw.   I rushed back to the room and I was almost sobbing with embarrassment. Would she be scarred for life? I will never know.  The caretaker came in a rage and saw that we were unfit and that we were animals. She then took Poppy away and that was the last I saw of her in the house.  I left your embrace and in the gown I chased after the caretaker and saw from around a corner that she took her to become a nun. I ran before the bitch could see me but she took me by the hair and threw me to ground. Causing me to miscarriage. I went home back to you I told you what happened and that I lost the baby who was a boy.  I laid in your arms and cried until my eyes were red and itchy.  I again had to recover and never had children again because my body changed after the stress, loss and the misscraiage. When i had more strength and healed I wrote a letter to Poppy and took it to the monastery where she was living until she got older. I asked the senior Lama to give this letter to Poppy when she can read and write.  I could not believe the fact that I am young and barren. I then ran back as a nobody.  When I came to you we shyly couple. My love for you is emense and intense but not for the love of life.  If it wasn't for you I would have jumped. For the next few days I took the teachings and read and re-read them until I felt better.