Amoung the prayer flags

Letter to a monk 6

Yeshe, my little Buddha.

My companion, lover and teacher. Today you were teaching the other monks martial arts. But I did not know. All I know was that you said good morning and we kissed. Our tounges doing an erotic dance. Then you left. I didn't see you my love until you came back sweaty. Then I knew and I was very upset. You appoarched me and tried to kiss me but I scratched you in your eye and drawing blood. You felt your face and saw the blood but did not yell or get the least bit angry.... you just gently kissed me on the lips and said that your were going to get your face looked at and that we could couple when he was back.

I saw a trail of blood and I wept for a little bit. When you came back you had stitches from where I scratched you and you that there would be a scar. I apologized and said that martial arts reminded me of Tashi.

You sort of looked like a wise, skinny and older Tashi. Then I was afraid again.

"You shouldn't be afraid of me, my love.  They don't hurt. " you assured me. Suddenly I did not feel as bad. Again the compassion, wisdom and love was ended up getting me almost excited.

"Please don't teach fighting again my love, promise me" I said embracing you. You said that you would talk to the abbot and see what will happen. I took your hand, put it on my left breast and lead you to the bed. We rolled into bed and I grabbed you by the head to see your face. I ran my lips and tongue and gently kissed kissed your scars. I could feel you getting harder and harder I got on up of you rode you and kissed your scars and tranced my tounge to the shape of your lips. I let a tear drop on your face. I said that I was sorry, you stroked my cheek bone with your hand.

"It wasn't you that did it.  You were and still are traumatized, I have no hate in my heart." You said. "You should know that by now" and kissed me. 

" it gets worse, when you were in qin and I was in the Sherpa land I used the moves you thought me to seduce men and that's how I met Tashi. We only smoked opium and fornicated. He got annoyed with our daughter and I gave her up to a monastery and they starved her to death," I sobbed. All you said was that it was a dark time and that I was only human.

"Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, just kiss me," you said with a sad smile. I kissed your scars. You said that makundra was in a better place and kissed me back. "Not your fault!"  You got on top of me and and in between my legs and made love to me. 

You rolled over and said That martial arts problem was going to be fixed. The next morning you were standing beside the bed waiting for me to wake up. When I woke up you had a smile on your face and said I won't teach martial arts again.  I spoke to the abbot. That smile made my heart swell.  I put my hand on your chest over your heart, got up and kissed you.

"When do we leave for those places?!" I asked.

"When were done the mandala. " you said. "You can come and participate." I kissed you again. I was honoured.

"Will you be with us making the mandala, my love". I asked.

"No I will be sweeping the steps." You said.  I thanked you and then gave you one last kiss before going to do the mandala.