Legless, But Alive | TWDG Season 5 Fanfic

Led To This

The two walked back silently, Louis' hands covered in dirt from digging. Clem was tired, and wanted more than anything to just be back at the school already. It felt so much further walking back then it had as she left. The quiet was comforting. It wasn't a rare occurrence with Louis. It still felt odd, even now. He used to be so lively, so talkative. Now he was just a husk of that. She could hear him crying himself to sleep some nights, the thin walls not providing much privacy for anyone. Everyone knew that everyone around them was just pushing it down. Everyone had their share of hurt, and it was a shame that none of them thought to really share it with each other. The fear of weakness had become all too real. They had buried Tenn, Clementine struggling with the weight of the body, and ended up having to move it in more of a dragging fashion. It felt degrading and wrong, but there was no other option, really. They covered him up again in an unmarked grave and left as if nothing had happened. Now here they were, on the old dirt road again.
The sun was setting, Clementine could feel it. Night was falling. It had been quite a long day. She didn't know how to feel, if she was being honest with herself. She wanted to befriend Javier after all this time, maybe see Kate and Gabe, yet.. He could have killed AJ. He didn't, but he could've. She knew that wouldn't be overlooked. Not by her, or the others. On a separate note, her leg was burning. It really hurt. Oddly enough, the full leg hurt more than the stub from holding her weight alone. The crutches could only do so much. Louis seemed to be looking everywhere except her direction, an obvious attempt to avoid her gaze. Was he upset with her? "So.." He looked to her for a split second, expressing interest. "The people." He nodded, and diverted his eyes back to the road. "They uh.. They took Aasim and AJ." She swallowed hard, and his head swerved to her. "They're fine now! I wouldn't be shitting around if they weren't." He sighed in relief and looked down to his feet as he walked. "I knew one of them. They weren't telling him where I was, so.. Yeah, probably not the smartest move to let AJ take my hat." Louis nodded. As long as they were safe, and there was no threat of these people hurting him or anyone else in their group, Louis didn't seem to care very much about the details.
The silence lingered on. It wasn't really like Louis could contribute to conversation very much. Not now, or ever, really. Either he had left his chalk back at the school, or he just wanted to be alone. Clementine felt it was safe to choose the latter. They arrived back at the school in the next few minutes, AJ running over to open the gates. A cold breeze blew through the courtyard. Aasim and Ruby sat together on an old, faded couch: a roaring fire in front of them. Violet had been standing watch, and stepped down when they entered. She had a slightly pissed off expression painted across her face. "Why did EITHER of you two go alone? That's not how we fucking do things!" She said, crossing her arms. She looked to the ground angrily for a moment before raising her gaze back to them. "Louis, that was fucking stupid, especially with everything else going on." He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "And Clem, even a walker is risky with you!" Clementine scowled. "I'm fine alone." AJ had intended to run up and talk with them, but sensed the tension and stood next to Violet, observing. Violet face planted. "You said that at the bridge, and then I left you and you got bit!" She knew she was pushing Clem's buttons, and didn't want to make her upset, but she needed for her to know how reckless it was. Louis had slipped off, taking advantage of the minor chaos. Clementine was really mad now. "I wouldn't have ever gotten bit if Minerva didn't fucking chop my leg open!" Her words hit Violet like venom on her skin, her accusatory tone only escalating the situation. She tried so hard not to think about that night, and she knew that Violet did too. "Just fuck off.." She was tired. Tired of being treated like she needed help. She had made it on her own for so long, they had no idea what the hell it was like. Violet fell silent, and Clementine stormed off in the direction of the dorms. Omar tried to stop her to signal that dinner was soon, only to be ignored.

Vi tried not to feel remorseful. Clem had been through a lot lately, though.. she was bound to burst. "Fuck.." Yeah, nevermind, she knew she messed up. AJ frowned at her. "Should I go check on Clem?" She sighed and shook her head. "Might be better to leave her for now..." He nodded. Omar served food mechanically as he had every night. Everyone ate in silence, Clem's absence hanging over them. Violet zoned out as she stared at her now empty bowl. She thought about what Clem had said. Fuck, she should've just killed Minnie- Minerva. She should've killed Minerva. That person in the end wasn't Minnie anymore. She could've. She could've just taken care of it. She thought back to her face, her eyes twisted with madness, a chunk of her cheek gushing thick, red blood. Where had the old Minnie gone? Was it wrong to miss her? Things were better now, Violet was better now. If she could somehow have gotten a second chance at that moment, she wouldn't know what to do. She sighed, trying to think about something else. She looked to AJ who sat a seat over from her. "Hey AJ, do you wanna play with that big ball you found tomorrow?" She smiled. He paused eating for a moment, slurping the last bite. "Yeah!!" She smiled. "Maybe I can teach you soccer or something if we find a smaller one." Louis frowned and pulled out his chalkboard. 'Soccers stupid, let's teach him baseball!' She furrowed her brow. "Are we really having this conversation again?" He nodded, scribbling again. "Baseball is stupid, Lou!" He flipped the board up. 'Not as stupid as Soccer.' She laughed. "I guess whatever equipment we find first, we can teach him." Aj was just watching the argument. "I don't know what either of those are.. but I'm sure it's really fun!" Aasim chuckled. Violet smiled, glad to lighten the mood. "I think I should go bring Clementine some food, I'll see you guys later." She went over to the big pot and grabbed the metal serving spoon, filling a spare bowl. The tops were cracking and the paint on the outside peeling, but a bowl's a bowl.
Violet walked down the hall cautiously, careful not to let the stew spill. The sound of her boots on the wood felt ominous against the backdrop of silence. She turned the corner and balanced the bowl on one hand as she knocked on the door. "Clem..?" Her voice came out scratchy and timid. Shit, was she giving her the silent treatment? She waited a moment. "I'm coming in." She pushed the door open, and stepped inside. Clementine was nowhere to be found. A slight panic washed over Violet. Had she gone out again to prove a point? Shit. She didn't want to make everyone worry, but they had to find her. She placed the soup down on her dresser beside her bed next to the venus fly trap. Where did they even find this shit? Whatever, she thought to herself, and ran out to the yard.
Louis and Violet had been searching the interior of the school for a half hour now, Willy walking the exterior perimeter with Omar. Ruby and Aasim had taken the difficult task of keeping AJ busy on the swing. No need to worry him if they didn't have to. They had scoured the entire dorm building, and Louis had taken to searching the admin building. Willy re-entered through the gates, giving Violet a head shake as she passed. Omar came behind. "Okay, you go take the green house." Willy nodded, and jogged in that direction. Where else could she be? "Relax, Vi, she wouldn't leave." Said Omar, seeming much less worried then the others. Violet flipped him off. "I don't care, just fucking find her." He shrugged. "She wouldn't-" "JUST FIND HER!" He was startled by the outburst, and turned on his heels to go help Willy. He knew better than to argue. Violet sighed, closing her eyes. Where could she be? Where hadn't they looked? If she left the school, then she could be anywhere. Vi paused. Had anyone checked the bell tower?

Clem scowled, taking a secluded path to avoid the others. Her stomach rumbled, but she ignored it. She had gone much longer without foot. She'd be fine. The kids had blocked off a lot of the school. She wondered if they had looted all of it before doing so. There wouldn't be much, but maybe a book to help with AJ's reading, or furniture to burn. She'd bring it up later. For now: Clem was mad, really mad. She hadn't been able to feel in quite a while. Who the hell did she think she was? Clementine was fine on her own, always had been. She had no right to try to treat her like some fucking liability. Without her, they'd all be dead. She didn't really like being upset, it made her feel weak. Being sad, remorseful, was one thing. Feeling hatred was just a waste of time. She didn't really know where she was going, just walking around the campus outside. It was getting dark, so she knew she'd have to go back eventually. She saw the bell tower, approaching it hesitantly. Clem looked down to her stub. Could she still climb up there? She stepped inside, and tilted her head all the way back to look to the top. It was higher than she remembered.. Maybe at the time she was too distracted. She thought back to that night. All that had happened, the things that had changed. She paused. Violet said to herself.. She didn't have to stay, she didn't have to go through the bullshit. Maybe she'd have been better off if she had left. Probably would still have her foot. Yet, despite that.. She looked at what she had gained. A home, friends, someone she loves with all her heart. Suddenly she didn't feel mad anymore. Clementine knew she was where she was meant to be. She couldn't say she didn't have regrets, but everything she had done had brought her here. Brought AJ here. All the way back to the start. She was taught to be smart, loyal, selfless.. But to be brutal as shit when she deemed fit. All that she had done, the places she had been, the people she'd met: all led to this. This moment, this night. This school and these people. And just like that, all felt peaceful.
The peace was slightly disrupted as Violet came sprinting in. "Holy shit.." She wrapped her arms around Clem from behind, startling her. "God, Clementine.. I thought.." She turned to face her. "Vi? What's wrong..?" She was breathing heavily. "What's wrong? You've been missing for- like- two hours!" Clem nodded. "Uh.. oops.." Violet frowned. "We thought.. We thought you were gone.." she ran a hand through her hair, holding back tears of relief. "I don't know what I'd do without you.." Clementine looked away for a moment, taking a breath. Had she really been gone that long? "I'm not leaving, I promise.." She kissed Violet gently. She smiled, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry about what I said I just, hell. I didn't know what to do. I just.. It was like back at the raid, she had the barrel to your head, I- I didn't think. I can't think it through, not when it comes to you." Clementine wiped one of the tears streaming down Violet's face away. "I'm sorry I scared you. I'm not mad. Not with you, or anyone. I just need some time to.." She didn't know how to word it. Figure stuff out? Not really. Violet filled in the blanks. "I get it. I know you've dealt with a lot of shit." She cleared her throat, rubbing her arm awkwardly. "There's so much I don't know. I want to help you, Clem, just.. Let me know how." Clem laughed. "Well, for one, we should get a ladder or something in here." She nodded her head to the tower around them. Violet smiled. "On it, captain." She laughed and kissed her again, and the two walked back to the courtyard, hand in hand.