The Mandalorian Jedi

Chapter Thirty

"Rhea? Rhea what happened?" I looked up to see Obi-Wan crouched next to me,
"Obi? How are you- how did you survive?"
"How did you? Did you do all of this?" I sat up slightly and looked around. There were at least two dozen clones scattered around us. Their armour was cracked, whole chunks were missing in places. The columns across the path from us had thick, jagged cracks running down them and branching out across the floor,
"I don't- you didn't do this?"
"I'm afraid not, Rhea I need to know what happened. Where is Anakin?" I couldn't answer. How was I meant to tell him? Before I was forced to come up with something his eyes fell on Ka'ra and he sighed sadly. I didn't stop him as he took her from my arms and lay her on the ground in front of us,
"I am so sorry." I nodded and took a deep breath before forcing myself to stand up. I wobbled slightly and Obi-Wan put a hand on my back to support me.

"Taken Grogu to safety you have?" I turned to see Master Yoda walking towards us. Naakla was beside him, her ears drooping. I picked her up as she trotted over and nodded,
"I left him with a droid. It has orders to get him to safety and protect him no matter what."
"Thank you I do." He looked at the mess surrounding us "lost control you did young Rhea." I shook my head,
"I don't know what happened Master."
"Strong with the force you are and controlled by anger and sadness you were. Defend yourself from the dark side you must. Taught this by Mace you were. Remember Rhea. Forget his lessons you cannot."
"Yes Master."

"We must continue." I paused and looked at Ka'ra on the ground, "we cannot take her Rhea, we have no time. More clones will come and won't be able to take them all."
"She deserves a funeral Obi. She died for me and it's my fault I should have protected her, I should've-" I was stopped by the feeling of Yoda's hand on my leg,
"Your fault this is not. Bonded by the force you were, her destiny to die for you it was," he turned to look at her and reached his hand out. After a moment of concentration a small flame flickered to life and in moments her entire body was engulfed in fire, "one with the force she is."

"Ni su'cuyi, gar kyr'adyc, ni partayli, gar darasuum."
'I am still alive but you are dead. I remember you, so you are eternal.'
It was a Mandalorian phrase I had not thought I was going to have to use ever again. A remembrance of those past, meant to be spoken every day to honour their memory. At some point it became too difficult to keep repeating but I said it now, as I watched her body burn. She deserved more than words but they were all I had to give.

We waited just long enough for the flames to flicker out. I turned to leave and then paused before turning back. Still holding Naakla in one hand I held my lightsaber in the other and ever so gently guided a pile of her ashes into a circle around one of the blade emmiters. They sunk in, leaving only a slightly darker, grittier section of metal in their wake. I tried not to think about a time when a similar ring would find itself curled around the second emitter. Obi-Wan and Yoda looked at each other with a sad look and motioned for us to start moving again.

I would have said the bodies scattering the halls got easier to look at as we walked but the sight of the younglings would have made it a lie. Some people look at peace when they die. The younglings did not. Their faces were plastered with looks of complete and utter terror. I tried to pretend I couldn't see the marks of what had killed them until Yoda pointed it out. He gave me a look full of sorrow as he said it. Of course he knew who had killed them. Of course he did. I couldn't help but wonder if it had been Anakin or Norah who had landed the final blows. I still don't know who I wish it was.

"Rhea? Do you know who did this?"
"No."
"You have never been good at lying to me."
"Trust me Obi-Wan. You don't want to know the truth." I don't know why I was trying to protect him from what I knew he was moments away from discovering. Maybe I just hoped his trust in Anakin would make this all go away. That his love for his brother would somehow prove that this was all a nightmare I was seconds away from breaking out of. His hope, his belief, it was the only thing keeping me from crumbling away to dust at that moment. He didn't push for more information, he just kept moving, glancing back at the younglings every so often.

The recalibration of the message Palpatine had sent out to all the Jedi only took a few minutes to complete. I attempted to speed walk past where the security footage was held knowing full well what would happen if we stopped. We ended up stopping anyway.
"I have to know. I'm sorry."
"You already know Obi. Please just don't make us watch it. Don't make me see that again."
I could have begged him for years and he still would have done it. In the end he needed to see it for himself. Nothing I could say or do would change that. I should have looked away as the security footage started to play but for some reason I couldn't. My eyes just stayed fixed on the images playing out before us. Mace falling. Palpatine's speech. What the hell had he meant? As much as I would like to say he was making stuff up he was right. My memories had suddenly stopped in a bar somewhere in the depths of Coruscant and I woke up in a small room, my parents dead on the floor at my feet and me, a year older with absolutely no recollection of what had happened. It was a question for another time.

I finally looked away from the recording as Anakin fell to his knees in front of Palpatine. A few moments later the sounds of the recording stopped and I turned back to look at Obi-Wan,
"He has Norah too. It's my fault. Both of them, I should have kept Anakin away, I should have known this would happen and I should have stopped it."
"No, you can't believe that Rhea. None of it is your fault. None of it."
"Norah told me, she told me it was me. That the blood of everyone she killed was on my hands."
"She made her choice and Anakin made his. You are injured, Bale Organa is waiting for us on Polis Massa. I want you to go there and wait for me. Before you argue with me, you have been fighting all night. I have no doubt you have killed more clones than Master Yoda and I combined, you have been betrayed by two of your closest friends, watched your Master die in front of you, sent a child you have spent ten years taking care of away with no clue if he will be safe of not, lost an animal you were bonded to through the force and found out a large portion of your childhood was a lie." It sounded almost comical as he listed it all off, "you need rest Rhea so go to Polis Massa and await our arrival. Leave the rest to us. If we have not returned within three days you are to run and survive best you can. This will not last forever."
"You're sounding very optimistic for a man who has just lost everything."
"Oh, trust me. I am crumbling to pieces at this very moment but I need you to listen to me and I will pretend to be okay for as long as it takes to make sure you are." I set Naakla down on the ground and flung myself into his arms, trying not to start sobbing uncontrollably,
"Thank you. For being my brother."
"The honour is all mine sister. May the force be with you."
"And with you Obi. You too Master Yoda."
"See you again I shall young Rhea. A time for goodbyes this is not."
"Just in case Master." He smiled and bowed slightly. I walked away before I changed my mind. I was going to survive. For Grogu, for my family, for Ahsoka whether she was living or not, for everyone out there who was going to need my help. There was a life out there for me somewhere I was going to fight as hard as I damn well could to find it.