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i wouldn't say i'm trying to avoid the fact i have major feelings for ashtray.. but in a way i am ?
it's been a few days since "the" kiss , i haven't talked to him about the kiss or my feelings yet , but it's obvious it's in the air , im just nervous to bring it up.. and tell him that i like him.
because i really , really shouldn't. which makes me feel bad but anyone would say the same thing.
i'm stupid for still having feelings for him even knowing what he did , right ? i think so.
but in this case , i'll just have to be stupid. because i really like him. everything i've learned about him in the past month and a half , i like every part. aside from "that" whole thing obviously.
i felt really bad though , i want to talk to him about my feelings but i don't know if should , considering i feel guilty about even liking him in the first place.
but if i do , which i will.. eventually. hopefully he understands , if it's obvious. because i'm not gonna tell him i feel guilty about liking him , no fucking way.
-
ashtray and me had been watching tv for while , that was until he decided to fall asleep.
but i took that as my chance to do makeup on him.
i did it really bad because i was trying to be quiet , this boy wakes up really easily so i'm surprised he hasn't yet.
i had just finished putting eye shadow on him , and then writing "mar" with a heart on his forehead in eyeliner , when i laughed on accident.
oh no.
i quickly grabbed my phone , taking a picture just in time.
he opened his eyes , looking at me and then sitting up. i laughed again , making him squint his eyes.
faye came from taking the trash out , sitting down on the other couch and looked at us.
"nice makeup." she smiled at him , i chuckled at the fact she was completely serious and it did that as a joke.
ashtray turned to me , giving me a glare and heading to the bathroom.
i ran to fezcos room , closing it and pressing my back up against it. "what the hell ?"
i smiled , hearing ashtray cuss behind the door. "fez , help me."
he squinted his eyes , and just as he did ashtray started trying to open the door.
"mariana get this shit off me !"
"fez ! help !" i was laughing , while trying my hardest to keep the door closed.
"nah man that's all you." god dammit fezco.
ashtray pushed the door open , making me quickly run out the room. but of course he caught me.
