Bella's officially graduated middle school. After 3 years of ups and downs will high school prove to be the "best four years of her life" or will it be her most challenging time? Leia's getting older and beginning to form new thoughts, experiences...
Monday, Dec. 10th (School) (Bella's Perspective) "Alright, it is time we vote. Write the name of whose idea sounds best in your opinion on a post-it note and put it in this box please." I hope these people have common sense. Bake-sales just make sense around this time of year. "Okay. I'll start reading the votes now. Marissa." She smiled. "Bella. Marissa. Bella. Bella. Bella. Marissa. Bella. Marissa. Marissa. And the last one...." Come on, please! "Bella." Everyone clapped. I was shocked, to be honest, Marissa has never been beat before, oh she's definitely out for my head. Her face looks super red. "With that being said, we will be having a bake sale!" "From what I saw from the samplings people like the Rice Krispies so we'll need extra of that." Lily said. We talked about what we'd contribute and ended our meeting early. Though I was happy to score a victory like this, my intention isn't to make anyone that angry so I went over to Marissa calmly. "Hey, I know things-" "This isn't over. Don't talk to me." She stormed out of the room. O-Kay..... ^^^^^^^^^^^ Tuesday (The Horton Hotel) (11:10 AM) "Mom?! Dad?! What are you both doing here?" I had a half-day today so I was in the clear. "What are you doing here?" Noah joked. Mom, Dad, and Noah were busy staring at the computer screen like their lives depended on it. "Why are you guys staring at the laptop like that?" "You know how we're moving?" "Yeah, which I don't quite like...." "We might've found the best place ever." I walked over hesitantly. "There's enough bedrooms for everyone plus our future addition to our family. Look at the kitchen. Liv." "I like how open the upper level of the apartment is." "You guys really like this place, don't you?" I asked. "Yep." "Are you guys gonna tour it or something?" "Yes, it starts in about an hour so we've gotta go. Are you coming?" I guess it wouldn't hurt to look. ^^^^^^^^^ 1065 5th Ave (12:30 PM) "Welcome to duplex apartment 7A." I looked around. It was really open. "So you get off of the elevator and land on the upper level of the residence. The majority of the bedrooms are on this floor." This place looks pretty nice! The kitchen, living, and dining rooms looked pretty and the terrace gave a good view of the reservoir.
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"This is mine!" This bedroom had a walk-in closet and the best view of the rest of Manhattan. It was simple with the regular furnishings but I could turn it into a pretty cute room. "Looks like someone is excited." Mom and Dad kept talking to the guy and I stayed in the room. I saw Noah in the corner of my eye approaching me. He sat next to me. "Hey, Bellie-Ellie." I smiled. "You haven't called me that since third grade." "I know. Are you feeling okay? I could tell you weren't too happy about coming here, then you liked the house, and now you're quiet and isolating yourself." "You're very observant." I joked. "When am I not? But seriously, are you okay?" Noah is someone that I trust with all of my heart. He's my older brother. Even though we fight and tease each other, he's always there for me, protecting me. "I'm...I think...I don't know. Some days I wake up and I feel good and some days I wake up and I feel horrible and I cry. I wake up in the middle of the night and just cry." "Have you told-" "Guys, we're going to tour the lower level of the house now!" He looked at me. "We could talk about it later." ******************** West End Ave. (Tuesday) (Olivia's Perspective) "Okay. Call me back when you get something. Thank you." I feel like I'm answering a million calls today. "There hasn't been one moment where I've seen you put that thing down." "I'm sorry, Amanda." She smiled. "It's fine. Planning something big?" "Bella wants a birthday party with her besties and a sleepover. She's getting the best of the best, cream of the crop." "To make up for the fact that her biological father has been stalking her for the past few months?" "No, because she deserves it...and maybe a little bit of that." I sighed. "She's been unhappy lately and I just want to make her feel special for a moment." I said while texting my friend Carine. "So what do you have planned so far?" "I'm trying to do the whole aesthetic vibey thing. Cowgirl hats? Fluffy crowns, LED lights, and a silent disco so that my house won't be too loud." "That sounds nice. Tell me how I can help." My phone rang again. "It's TARU. They've got something on the phone." ************** West Side Therapy (Wednesday) (Bella's Perspective) "Stop! That's not cool!" I said as we played UNO. "Hey, you set the rules." I giggled. "Another round?" "Of course. So Bella, is it okay if we talk about last week?" Last week I walked out of my session. That was no bueno. I knew this was coming, but I couldn't stop it. "Yeah." Dr. Turner shuffled the cards. "Your mother told me that you had a panic attack and that you started to show some regression in progress." I started to zone out. I don't want to talk about this... "Bella?" "Yes, I did." I fidgeted with the cards until I got annoyed and threw them on the ground. "It's okay to be angry, Bella." I turned away so that she wouldn't see me cry. "I'm not angry..well not right now." "What do you mean by that?" "I told my Mom about this...kind of. I just feel like my emotional meter or whatever is broken. I wake up sad, I cry during the night and just sluggishly make my way through school and some days I'm okay, I'm fine. And some days I wake up happy and end the day sad. I'm broken." "You're not broken. Usually, people feel this way when they've suppressed their emotions. Our feelings are funny in that they just find a way to come up, whether it be because of a trigger or it just occurs randomly." "But I should be happy...more." "Bella, happiness isn't linear. There are days when you'll just feel angry or sad. It's okay. It's okay to feel what you feel, and once you recognize that, talking will be a bit easier. You believe that you have to be happy all of the time, but you don't, Bella. You don't." ^^^^^^^^^^^^ Home (6:57 PM) "Jake...." I giggled as he told me about his day today. "How unkind." "He was getting on my nerves." "Okay, but we talked about you know...having more patience." "I only have patience for you and our friends. No one else." He pulled me close. "Guys, dinner is ready." We instantly let go of each other. "Alright, Dad! We're coming." "That was close." "No, Duh." We made our way to the makeshift dining table. We'll not really makeshift... it just doesn't feel homey. "Ooo, my favorite!" I said. "Of course, it's you that we're celebrating after all. So we have Bella's current favorite, penne alla vodka with chicken parm." "Let's dig in!" We all just started talking after that. Though therapy upset me today, when I'm around my family and friends at least, I feel temporarily better. I just hope she doesn't tell Mom about some of the things I said today. "Mom, did you hear about Zayn and Gigi? I'm so jealous." "I did, I meant to talk to you about it, are you handling it alright?" "No, we were in a relationship." I joked. "You know, Bella told me that if Zayn Malik were to ever ask her out in some weird alternate universe that she'd say yes even though we're together." "Jake, we're talking about Zayn. Mom be honest, there has to be at least one guy that you'd date if you somehow had the chance that's not Dad." "Well...." "I can't believe you're actually answering this." Dad told her. I'll tell you later, Mom mouthed. We both chuckled. "So Jake, you played soccer in the fall, how was that?" Dad asked. "It was nice playing something other than football for a change. It was a good season." "Do you play soccer again?" "Definitely." "Hey guys, I think we should share one thing we like about Bella or one really good experience you had with her." Noah suggested. "That sounds great." Eli decided to go first, but Leia wasn't having it. "But I wanna go first!" "Leia, it's not your turn." Mom said. "You can go next, Lei." She then started to throw a fit and kick up. "Go to your room, Leia." "You never listen to me!" Leia screamed before slamming our bedroom door shut. "Sorry about that..." "As I was going to say, one thing I like about Bella is the way she studied people." "What does that mean?" "When we met at the BBQ you sort of studied me, what I did and stuff, and then when you talked to me you instantly knew what I liked somehow. It's because you pay so much attention to others. That's what makes you likable." "Awww." "Can I go next?" Noah asked. I nodded. "One thing I like about you is how you're willing to put up a fight, no matter how hard things get. One time in Long Island a long time ago, Bella didn't know how to ride a bike. So...I teased her about it. She said: I could learn how to ride a bike in a day, just watch me. She spent the next day falling over and over again on that ratty bike until she was zooming down the block." We all laughed at the story. "I remember, she wouldn't stop until she knew she could ride it." "Who's next?" "IT'S NOT FAIR THAT I DON'T GET TO GO!" Leia wailed. "I wanna go now!" "Leia, you lost that privilege a while ago." Oh, dear. Leia's been having more outbursts lately so I know this isn't ending anytime soon. Great. *************** Bella and Leia's Room (Jake's Perspective) "I'm sorry that you had to see that...Leia isn't always that way, nor do my parents always get so angry.." "It's okay. She must be struggling because of everything." "Yeah..."
Mom: I'm downstairs
"My mom's here." "Oh, want me to walk you down?" "Nah it's okay, stay here. You've got to study for your science test. Good luck, okay?" "I'm sure to do great now." I kissed her and told her goodbye. "Mrs. Stabler?" I asked while making my way to the kitchen. "You don't have to call me that Jake.." "I know, it's just weird not to. Could I ask you a favor?" "Of course." She stopped putting away the leftovers and looked up. ***************** My Room (Leia's Perspective) "Stupid marker. It dried out!" I cried. I'm already upset that I didn't get to say my words to Bella and now I can't even draw! I kicked the wall over and over. "Leia, I heard you kicking in the bathroom. It was like a stampede." Bella said while fixing her pj's. "I don't care. Get out of my room." "You mean, our room." Bella sat down next to me. "Why have you been so angry today?" I started to rip the paper quietly. "Can I guess?" "Are you angry because of him?" I started to cry silently. "Okay, okay." "I wish that Mommy and Daddy would just tell the truth." "Truth about what?" "About what he did. Why he's a bad guy. Nobody ever tells me anything because I'm little. It makes me angry inside." "Well, Leia-" "You know don't you?!" "Yes, but Lei-" "Then can you tell me?" Bella sighed. "Why won't anybody tell me exactly what he did. I just wanna know why he's a bad guy." "I understand Leia, but you're too young to know about all of that. We don't wanna hurt you." "But I am hurt. And you're my sister my real sister. You promised that you'd be honest but you're not..." "Leia, I promise that I'll tell you everything one day when you're old enough to understand. But right now I can't tell you okay, I am being honest. Okay? I love you, Leia. Okay?" "Okay. Love you too." I still wish I could know. What if Bella's lying to me?
