Lust to Love to Loss

He kept walking towards us. I swear you probably could have heard my heart beating a mile away. I could feel the blush creeping up my cheeks. I was about to die from embarrassment. My cousins and Rachel remained calm and put together. I, however was about to run away....far from hear. Like back home. Sooner than I expected he was standing there. Saying hi and apologizing for something between Rachel and him...? How it was immature and stupid...? I'd have to ask him tonight. His gaze followed my movements. Before I knew it, Harry was talking to me.

"Hey Corinne."

"Hey..." He sensed the tension.

"I gotta go. Bye guys"

"Bye" the girls said weakly.

"Ugh don't you just hate him!?" Natalie groaned.

"I knoooow." Jenny agreed.

"Corinne, if you didn't know about last summer, basically he is a psycho bastard." Rachel chimed in as she looked to Natalie for an explanation and Natalie nodded in understanding.

"Last summer they kind of had a thing, things got serious and Rachel was ready to end the relationship...but he wasn't. He didn't get the message and found Rachel 'cheating' on him at one of my parties." Natalie took a deep breathe, "Things got a little 'out of hand' shall we say." She concluded. I didn't really believe her but I acted like I did.

"Wow. That's terrible!" I said. I was pretty sure you could tell I was lying but I could honestly care less about what Harry had done. I just couldn't see Harry doing something that rash.

"So what exactly happened with Harry?" I asked Natalie. We were in her room listening to some stupid rap music.

"Well him and Rachel weren't exactly official yet. She tried to get the point across that she wasn't interested anymore after like two weeks but it didn't work he kept pursuing her. She got sick of it and to prove the point she started seeing another guy. He was a total douche but she wanted to prove a point. His sisters threw a party last year because they had the summer off. They invited Rachel and me and a bunch of other girls. Of course he was there, it was their house. Rachel and this guy borrowed his room and he walked in. It was bad....he started freaking out, screaming at her, calling her a bitch, a whore, no-good heart-breaker. They both left the party hurt. We all thought he was bipolar but we weren't sure. We all kinda stereotyped him. I know it was wrong but he was a freak." She kinda trailed off, "I don't suggest hanging out with him.....I don't want you to get hurt.....or made fun of." She said icily.

"Okay." I hated her last words. She'd changed so much. Everything she said to me had a hidden insult in it. It hurt. Of course I was used to it. I'd received such insults from my other cousin, Jenny, when we were younger...but just because they were from my cousins, my family, made it hurt worse.

I climbed out of the window that night hoping to find some relief from Harry's kind words. There was something about him that I couldn't quite place. There were only two words: mysterious and reassuring. The best contradiction I know but seriously that's the only way I could describe him. He puzzled me and that's why I kept meeting him at night secretly hiding my bikini under my shorts and sweatshirt. I had to figure him out but I didn't know why exactly...he was like a magnet. As I walked past his house I pulled my cell phone out and texted him; 'Hey. You up? I'm gonna head to out meeting spot.'

Instant reply: 'Wait up! Lol ;)' I couldn't help smiling. How could he be so friendly. As I watched him jog down the beach to meet me I realized I hadn't told him about Braden yet. I sighed. He told me everything so why couldn't I? Ugh, well first I had to ask about him and Rachel. We walked to our favorite little spot in silence. Once we sat down I took a deep and let the words slip from my mouth, the words I had been keeping in all day; "so what went down between you and Rachel last summer?" I didn't mean for it to sound as snotty as it did. Or jealous. That definitely sounded jealous. As he repeated the same story Natalie had told me I let my focus turn to him personally. Could I really trust him? He sounded nice and trustworthy but after this I wasn't sure. Then it hit me, first, that was last summer, second, he didn't lie to me about what had gone down. As he finished, a thought-jerking silence settled over us so I spoke up.

"I left out a small part of my life."

"Hmmm...?" He seemed confused.

"My ex." As I told everything, literally EVERYTHING, I felt his gaze soften with empathy.....he knew how I felt. We just kinda stared out at the ocean after that because we had both just spilled our guys out about our heartbreaks. We had nothing left to say. I was pulled out of my trance by his yawn.

"I'm think we should head back." He said softly.

"I agree." I said as I stood up. We walked back in a silence that was expected. As I turned to say goodbye, I was pulled close to him by his arms. He was hugging me but this time it had so much emotion to it. This time I hugged back with the same intensity I guess, if hugs can be intense.

"Bye." I said pulling away.

"Bye."

As I climbed into bed I saw the clock. Four in the morning. Damn it. The problem was, we had an event tomorrow.

My cousins were throwing their pre-fourth-of-July party. I. Was. Fucked.