A Promise

Chapter Thirty-Five

The days dragged by slowly and painfully, each more excruciating than the last. Monsieur Girard continued to force me to beg for my meals. Usually I refused, which earned me numerous beatings, but sometimes, when I was feeling especially weak with hunger and thirst, I complied and was rewarded with a meager portion of rotten food and a small cup of dirty water. Slowly, my ankle and my broken rib began to heal, although my Achilles' tendon never grew back properly. I tried to train myself to walk with my permanent injury, but no matter how much I practiced, I continued to walk with a limp. Twice I tried to escape, but each time I failed due to the fact that I could not run fast with my injury. I began to fall into despair, wondering if I would ever be able to keep my promise and return to Enjolras. I began secretly wishing that somehow Enjolras would find out the truth and he would come save me. I reminded myself again and again that these desires were selfish and that it was better that Enjolras thought me dead, but that didn't stop me from looking up whenever the door to my cell opened and hoping that I would see Enjolras standing there. Each time, however, I was disappointed.

The days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months. Slowly, the months crept by, and soon enough it had been one year since I'd been captured. One year since I'd seen Enjolras. One year since I'd known what happiness was. And then another year came and went, and another, and another. I had lost so much weight that I had the appearance of a living skeleton, but I still harbored a small flicker of hope in my heart. I stubbornly held strong to the belief that one day I would make my grand escape and rejoin Enjolras. He was my one reason to live. He was the reason that I was not driven into madness sitting alone day after day. He was my one comfort. And then, another year went by. One day, I realized with a panic that I was forgetting exactly what he looked like. The day I forgot what his voice sounded like was the day I started contemplating suicide. No, I told myself sternly. You have to be strong. You promised you'd come back to him. I swallowed down my despair and depression and tried another half-hearted attempt at escaping. It came as no surprise to me that I hadn't made it more than a hundred feet when the guards caught up to me and dragged me back into my cell. I wanted to cry, but I found I had forgotten how. I didn't have enough energy to do anything other than lie on the cold, hard floor and stare at the ceiling. I had already memorized every crack and imperfection in that ceiling. I wondered if it was possible for a human being to die of boredom. I wondered why I wasn't dead yet. I wondered what would happen if I just decided to stop breathing. Be strong for Enjolras, said a detached voice in my mind. I obeyed the voice reluctantly, but I began to wonder why I continued to stay strong. Who was this Enjolras to me anyways? A friend? A brother? I couldn't remember. Wait, no, I could remember. He was my love, my heart, my everything. Had I actually forgotten who he was for a moment? What was wrong with me? I was going crazy. Completely insane.

And then something happened. Something that changed everything.

Monsieur Girard, my sadistic prison guard, died. He just fell over one day, clutching his chest. And when he died, I didn't feel anything, neither triumph nor grief. But when I found out who was replacing him, I felt something strong. It had been so long since I'd felt an emotion other than despair that I couldn't quite figure out exactly what I was feeling, but I knew I felt it. That unknown emotion swirled up inside me until it came bursting out of me in the form of laughter. Not joy-filled laughter, but rather delirious, insane laughter. I laughed until my ribs felt like they were cracking, and when I was done laughing, I started crying. Because the person who replaced Monsieur Girard was the one person in this world whom I hated more than anyone else. I didn't know how or why he was there, but the person replacing him was Inspector Vauquelin.

(Author's Note: Thank you so so much for all your support! Y'all are amazing! Sorry about how depressing the chapters have been lately. Hopefully they'll get happier soon... Or maybe not... **evil laugh**)