A Promise

Chapter Forty

When my eyes finally fluttered open, the first thing I noticed was that I was lying in a soft bed with fluffy pillows and warm blankets. The sun had already set, and the light of the moon poured through the window.

"You're awake," said a voice. I looked over to see Enjolras, who was sitting in a chair beside my bed, holding a wet cloth in his hand with which he had apparently been dabbing my forehead. "Cosette was here," he explained when I noticed I had been bathed and changed into a nightgown. "She left some dresses for you to wear. She had to leave to pick up her children from their friend's house, but she told me to tell you how happy she is you're alive."

Enjolras said all of this without any emotion. His lack of feeling was not like it had been before, when he had put on a marble facade in order to hide his true emotions. No, this time, he looked truly dead inside, as if he really didn't feel anything at all. I looked at him more closely, and I noticed some things that I had not seen when we'd first reunited. His eyes were blood-shot and dark. His chin was covered in stubble, as if he had not shaved in a few days. He looked tired and sad.

"Enjolras?" I asked softly, sitting up in bed.

"What is it?"

I hesitated, then continued talking, my words stumbling out of my mouth awkwardly. "I- I was just wondering... well... Are you happy to see me?"

Enjolras took my hand. My heart skipped a beat at his gentle touch. "Of course," he said, although his expression still looked empty and sad.

I gave him a tentative smile. "I'm happy to see you, too," I said.

"Where have you been all these years?" he asked. I could hear anguish in his voice. At least he no longer sounded emotionless.

"I was taken to prison by Inspector Vauquelin," I said. I hesitated for a moment, wondering if I should tell him that I had traded my freedom for his. No, I decided. Telling him would only cause him to feel guilty.

"That bastard," Enjolras spat, his eyes angry. "I'll kill him."

"No, Enjolras," I said quickly. "He was the one who helped me escape. He's changed. He feels bad about his past and wants to change his ways."

"I don't care," Enjolras snapped. "He threw you in jail, and he made me think you were dead. He ruined our lives, Eponine. I will murder that little-"

"Enjolras, stop!" I begged. "You were the one who showed me the power of forgiveness. Don't you remember?"

Enjolras did not meet my eyes. "I remember," he said softly.

I pulled him close to me and forced him to look at me. I searched his eyes. I could tell there was something in him that was broken and wounded. "I never forgot about you," I told him. "All those years in jail, I had one ray of hope. I hoped that you were somewhere out there, making a life for yourself, finding happiness."

"Eponine," he said weakly. "All these years I've believed you to be dead. I never had any hope without you."

"I'm here now," I said, grasping his hand. I leaned over and planted a soft kiss on his lips. He stiffened at first, then kissed me back lightly. Everything about the moment felt so right. After so many years of waiting, we were finally back together. He was mine, and I was his. Everything was perfect. And then that moment ended.

"No," Enjolras muttered, pulling away from me. "I can't do this."

"What do you mean?" I asked, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "Don't you love me still?"

"I- I do, but I can't," Enjolras stuttered, turning away from me. "I'm sorry, Eponine, but I can't kiss you."

"Why?" I asked desperately.

"You were gone for ten years," he said, running his fingers through his messy hair in frustration. "Ten years, Eponine! You were essentially dead. A lot of things change in ten years."

"Does love change?" I asked. "I always believed our love was something time could not erase."

Enjolras was quiet for a long time. Finally, he took a deep breath. "When we fell in love, you were sixteen, and I was nineteen. We were so young back then, and we had a beautiful relationship. But then, Eponine, we had a ten year hiatus. We can't just pick back up where we left off and pretend those ten years didn't happen."

"We can't pretend our relationship didn't happen either," I said, letting my tears fall.

"Don't cry," Enjolras told me, wiping the tears from my cheeks. "I'm only doing what's best for you."

"How is this 'what's best' for me?" I asked, my voice rising. "I spent ten years rotting in a cell waiting for the day I would escape and return to your side. That was the only thought that kept me going. Now the day I've been waiting for is finally here, and you're telling me that it's 'best' we pretend our relationship never happened."

"I don't want us to pretend anything!" Enjolras countered. "I just want you to stop and think for a moment. I'm not the same man you fell in love with when you were sixteen."

"And I'm not the same woman you proposed to under a bridge, but if I remember correctly, we made a promise to always be together."

"No, Eponine, you made a promise to always stay by my side. You made a promise you wouldn't endanger yourself at the barricade. You made a promise you would never take off that bloody ring. Well guess what, Thenardier, you broke all of those promises, and now look what's happened!"

I stared at him, unable to believe what I was hearing. I had never seen him so upset. Enjolras' eyes widened as he realized what he had just said. "Eponine, I didn't mean to say that," he said. "You know I don't blame you for any of this."

I just shook my head, staring down at my hands. "Forget about it, Enjolras," I said dully.

We were silent for a long time, each of us afraid to address the other. I stared down at my hands, listening to the sound of his heavy breathing. I had spent an entire decade dreaming about him. Now it seemed he had spent that same decade forgetting about me.

"Eponine," Enjolras finally said after a while.

"Yes?"

"While you were imprisoned, did you ever hear anything about someone bailing me out?" he asked. "The nurse at the hospital I went to after revo- I mean, the rebellion- Well, she told me an anonymous person paid a high ransom to keep me out of jail. Did you ever hear anything about who that might have been?"

I bit my lip and did not meet his eyes. "No, Enjolras," I said. "I never heard anything, but I'm sure whoever bailed you out was someone who loved you very much."

"Oh," Enjolras said. "Okay. I thought maybe it was my father, but he has refused to speak to me since... you know."

I nodded, and we both fell into a long awkward silence. Then, the door to the bedroom opened, causing me to jump in surprise. I looked over to see a little girl standing in the doorway. She had fiery red hair, bright blue eyes, and freckles splashed across her nose. Although she was only about five or six, she looked like she was wise beyond her years. The girl walked up to Enjolras and pulled on his shirt.

"Papa, I can't go to sleep," she said. "Can you tell me a bedtime story?"

My heart seemed to stop. Papa?

(Author's Note: Dun dun dunnn.... Sorry. I know you all are probably very angry at me right now, but don't you fret, my lovelies. I have plans. Wonderful plans... Mwahaha...)