Irish Oxytocin

Forgiveness | 17

                           ❁ Chapter 17 ❁

Shouldn'T Have These Feelings

Here I am alone staring at these four walls
Wondering why you're still on my mind
I'm trying to think of something or someone else besides you
I shouldn't have these feelings that I do

After all I don't even know you all that well
I should know better but I don't
I can't help these feelings that I have for
you
And I don't know why

Why can't you get out of my head
Cause the more I think about you
The more I will fall in love with you
And I try to push these feelings away

But they come right back
Every time I talk to you I get a funny feeling
That maybe we are meant to be
Then again I'm lost in these feelings for you that should've never taken place.

- ESPN CHICK

Cora's Point of View

The breeze was chilly on my face as the windows of Nolan's Camaro rolled down. My elbow gently rested on the bottom of the window sill as my tie remained undone around my neck. Nolan's had been taken off completely, and his buttons were buttoned down a bit. The heat that May was bringing us was surprisingly dominant for a Monday morning.

The clock changed to nine AM, signalling that school had begun. I stared at my phone blankly hoping Daniel's contact would pop up with some sort of sign he doesn't totally hate my guts.
The worst part is, I know he just wants what's best for me. I just don't know how to make life easier for him. I hope he doesn't feel like a babysitter, but I also hope he's okay.
I opened my phone, deciding to make the first move. I gently pressed the words "I love you" into the text box before hitting send. Minutes go by with no reply, and I eventually give up. I close my phone and placed it in the cup holder on my left side.

"Hey," Nolan started.

I turned to him as his eyes remained on the road.

"It'll be okay," he promised me.
"I know," I huffed. "I just hope he doesn't hate me."

Nolan let out a quiet chuckle.

"Hate you? You're a little dramatic, Ce. Daniel loves you. That's why he's upset. He would never hate you for finding your soulmate. He just doesn't want to see you get hurt," he explained.

I thought for a moment. It was odd to hear him call me his soulmate.

"Speaking of that," I started up.

Nolan glanced at me with a nervous look before bringing his eyes back to the road. I could tell from where we were that he was driving me to the cherry blossom field.

"We're soulmates," I stated.
"Well, no shit," he mocked.

I smacked his arm roughly as he laughed.

"I'm playing, Cora. Yes. You're my soulmate."

Even though it was small, the statement made my heart dance.

"Did you know?" I asked.
"Know what?" He questioned back.
"That it was gonna be me," I said.

He stayed quiet for moment, thinking about what he wanted to say.

"I think a part of me hoped," he admitted.
"I hate getting close to new people because of my past. A part of me hoped that me letting you in was a sign that it was meant to happen. I was scared this was going to hurt, and maybe it will eventually, but now I know for sure and confidently that it was worth the risk."