alimento mori

[22.4.15] ain't no rest for the wicked

We whisper through sin-stained lips, red with blood. I break my hand on your jaw but I kiss you better, cradling my hand to my chest. My eyes are bright with freedom but clouded by years of hell. You say we are friends and I say that we are each other's release. My hands still broken the next time I punch you, and I come out with a broken rib while you try to set a broken nose (I always did it for you) and there's a gash above your eyebrow. Do you regret buying me that ring?

     We kiss under a street lamp, your dark hair shining in the artificial light. Your smile is like the sun incarnate while my teeth are crooked and tobacco stained. I have soot in my lungs from too many cigarettes and each cough rattles my lungs. You try to stop me, try to fix me but I shrug you off and smoke another pack to spite you. Do you regret telling me I'm going to die from them?

     I see you in the daytime as I skulk around the back roads. I make deals in back rooms and money exchanges hands so many times I can't remember who originally gave it to me. Twenty for this, ten for that, and five for me I tuck the tips in my bra and shake my hips as I walk away. They'll give me ten next time or God be damned. You watch me take their money. Do you regret letting me leave last night?

     I taste death on your tongue and I suck it out of you like poison in a snake bite. You're pure and full of hope and I'm leeching the light out of you.But I take your doubt and negativity for myself and wrap it up, away from you. Do you regret letting me in?

     I'll suck on cherry lollipops and I'll die with a bullet lodged in my heart and you'll be too focused on my cherry stained, plump lips to notice the blood seeping through your white shirt on my torso. 

[alt. titled "i got over my writers block but i'm writing things i can't use in my portfolio"] tbh whenever i write these im always imagining a dystopian novel-esque character but less male-lead driven