A Boy From Manning Heights ✔️

Chapter 32 | Beckett

I turn awkwardly to Maggie and Preston biting my lip.

"Um...I'm not sure"

Preston scoffs shaking his head.

"Don't worry about it, he's gets like that always acts like a total fucking d-bag"

Maggie nods in agreement.

"It's not your fault, we'll get going"

I sigh because she doesn't know it probably is my fault, or my fathers at least. I can tell I'm upsetting Jasper by pushing him away, but I don't have another choice. I can't risk him getting hurt or my father getting upset. It's my life I'll deal with it.

Preston shrugs bringing my attention back to them.

"I'm gonna head out, I'll see you around"

Maggie mumbles a "bye P" as he walks toward his car and sighs turning back to me.

"Beckett?"

I look up at her having let my gaze drift to the ground.

"Yeah?"

She gives me a soft smile.

"You okay?"

Those words hit me hard and I have to pause and think through taking a breath so I don't just fall apart right then and there.

"I'm...fine"

She doesn't look convinced, but doesn't push either instead she nods toward the school.

"Is something going on with him?"

I bite my lip and shake my head once. I don't want to lie to her, I'm lying enough as it is, but I'm not outing Jasper. Besides it's far too much to explain.

She nods once as if she understands.

"You're good for him, don't let him push you away"

I almost laugh at the irony of her words if only it was him pushing me away. I whisper a barely audible "Ok" before she walks away and starts putting Harper in her car seat.

"I'll see you later"

I force a small smile and wave at Harper who grins.

"Bye Beck Net!"

Despite her adorable smile even that doesn't boost my mood and I just turn walking back towards the school and stand at the bottom of the stairs debating if I go to Jasper's room or mine. I know he wants me to go to his, the look he gave me earlier was one that without any words commanded me to see him.

I bite my lip and take the first step thinking to myself how I can still change my mind and not go. Push him further then I have, make this relationship strictly Mentor and Mentee once again. Even as I think it I'm climbing the stairs, I don't want that.

I love...holy shit. I love Jasper.

That stops me. Those three little words have me frozen at the top of the stairs. When did that happen? I've never loved anyone, not like this.

I clench the railing beside me until my knuckles are white trying to decide if the feeling will go away. If it will stop, but it doesn't because it's real. I know it is.

I love him, I love Jasper Collins.

Suddenly I'm hit with a wave of sadness because; I can't tell him. Not yet anyway. Not until I know I can keep him as far from my father as possible. Jasper's slipping as it is, he did outside. He almost said something, called me baby? I saw it; the moment he realized he almost slipped up, it's just too risky.