︵‿︵‿୨ ♡ Entry 3 ♡ ୧‿︵‿︵
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I had finally moved on, but that didn't mean my young heart was ready to stop beating. Victor, an adorable but nerdy new student, The first friend I made in 5th grade. He was sweet, funny and smart too. Just a simple crush without any controversy or problems. Just small confessions here and there, rarely traumatizing but memorable. You might know the feeling of being motivated to go to school because of a crush. Well, this was what I was experiencing. But Victor never stayed the outcast or nerd; he quickly became one of the popular kids, and I was a part of that because of him.
It's hard for my ex-friends to believe that I was the first girl he had talked to in class. Then again, as the popular group became more toxic, the further I was from Victor, The group changed him. I guess it benefited him, but not me. I know it's selfish, but I wish I could turn back time when we were the only ones in our own world. He was one of the guys I could freely talk to. But as time passed to the next grade, we grew further. Our relationship began as best friends in a teasing trope. I won't lie, I did enjoy his teases and jokes, but before those, we used to communicate and enjoy each other's company.
It is hard to believe that we had a spark, a spark that I wish to relive. I wrote stories about him in my diaries, a diary I stole from my sister because he had given it to her for her birthday. Our friendship grew through the school year, but it only grew less as I lost communication. I would have dreams of Victor and daydreams. I won't say the details, but it involves a lot of PDA. Anyway, I enjoyed our small sparks and conversations. I remember falling in love with him as soon as he mentioned how he found my nerdy glasses and pigtails cute. Which in my opinion wasn't, I would also keep his drawings that he made for me. Most are fictional characters; some are just cute drawings with hearts. When I mentioned that we chat online in class, he used to be so shy. There would also be little confessions for each other, but it wasn't official. But as time went by, I soon learned to leave him be and let him love what he loved. He has moved somewhere else now. I might not see him for a long time. But I will miss this annoying crush. So goodbye, Victor.
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