Taylor Swift Imagines

When we were young (I.)

Taylor's point of view:

'Have you heard her new song?'my mom asked while I was petting Olivia's head. I had no motivation to do anything else.

'Whose?' I asked back, knowing exactly who she's talking about. 

'I wasn't born yesterday, honey. I know this year's Brits was a lot to take. Especially, after what happened between you and...' 

'The one that shall not be named' I finished her sentence. 

'Y/N' my mom finished her sentence under her breath. I sighed.

I missed her. I missed her like crazy but it was easier to pretend I'm perfectly fine without her in my life. It was easier to pretend I hate her, even tho I hate myself for what I did to her. 

Seeing her at the Brits was one of the hardest things in my life, even 5 years after our break up. She still had my heart, my soul, every piece of my body, every thoughts of mine. She still was my muse, the one I write my songs about.

'I know she misses you too, Darling.'

'She probably hates me for what I did' I sighed and got up to get myself a bottle of water out of the fridge. 

'It was the best thing you could do and she knows that. You do, too.' 

'I know' I whispered and sat back down on the chair I was sitting on before. 

'I have to go to work but if I were you, I would give a listen to her new song, it's really good. I know you don't listen to anything of hers but you should give it a try this time, I think you would like it.'

It wasn't true. The part that I don't listen to her music. I do, actually. A lot. I gave my mom a weak smile and waved before she stepped out my apartment. 

'Let's see what you did this time' I whispered and pressed play to listen to her new song. 

XXX

"Everybody loves the things you do, from the way you talk to the way you move." 

Y/N alway found it extremely amusing that Taylor could do anything and her fans will be over the moon about it. But she understood why. Taylor was something else, she was different from other artists. She was special. Special to Y/N. 

"Everybody here is watching you 'cause you feel like home, you're like a dream come true."

Seeing her at the Brits was heartbreaking. Being near to Taylor always felt like home, being around her was safe and comfortable. Taylor was everything Y/N needed. But this feeling was one-sided, she thought. 

"But if by chance you're here alone, can I have a moment before I go? 'Cause I've been by myself all night long hoping you're someone I used to know."

Y/N couldn't help but looking at Taylor every once in a while. Come on! No, she wasn't looking every once in a while. She was staring at her all night long. She was thinking. 

"Has she moved on? Is she here alone? She probably changed a lot over the years. Should I go talk to her? Would it be awkward? Is she the same person I used to know? The same girl I used to love?" 

She had so many questions in her head but she decided not to dwell on the past. She did not talk to Taylor. 

"You look like a movie, you sound like a song. My God this reminds me of when we were young." 

She missed the older singer a lot, it was indescribable. Everything reminded Y/N of Taylor. Everything. They were so in love, so passionate. Sometimes she just wished she could go back in time. To where they were young. 

"I was so scared to face my fears, nobody told me that you'd be here. And I'd swear you moved overseas, that's what you said, when you left me."

Y/N knew she also messed up a lot of things. Usually, it takes two people for a relationship to be over. She couldn't fully blame Taylor, even tho she wanted to. She trusted Taylor but it was hard to believe that someone is there for her and she hasn't have to deal with her demons alone. 

But once Y/N realized that, it was too late. Taylor told her she's moving back to New York after spending 3 years in London. Maybe that's one of the many reasons why the Y/H/C haired girl felt bittersweet seeing her ex-lover back in London. 

"Let me photograph you in this light in case it is the last time that we might be exactly like we were before. Everything just takes me back to when you were there."

Everywhere she went, everything she did, they reminded her of her past. She tried to fight against her own feeling but after some time, she just gave up and accepted her fate. And that was Taylor. 

"And a part of me keeps holding on just in case it hasn't gone. I guess I still care. Do you still care?"

She tried to move on, she really did but it was not possible. Not when she was madly in love with Taylor. Will this feeling ever go away? She didn't know. She just knew that she's not ready for a relationship. Not with someone who's not the blonde girl. 

XXX

My eyes were prickling with tears once the song was finished, my breath caught in my lungs, a sob rose in my throat. 

'I do care' I managed to whisper. 

A/N: sooo, lately i've been pretty busy with studying since my final exams are in 2 weeks :)))) but! i'm trying to write your requests as soon as possible. thank you for your patience!