Love or Friendship? (HELLUVA BOSS FANFICTION)

Chapter 3: Well, well, well~

(WRITTEN: 30/05/22)

***

(BLITZO'S VAN)

Octavia: Who's she and what's she doing here?

Lenny: I also use he/him and they/them pronouns. I'm gender-fluid!

Loona: Big brain here is going to help us save your dad and my dad's employees.

Blitzo: Lenny's a genius when it comes to anything deadly and dangerous.

Lenny: I sure am! I smuggled a machine gun into Heaven in mah ass!

Octavia: Lovely.

Lenny pulls out blood coloured lipstick and applies it to his lips before drawing thick lines of lipstick down both sides of his face.

Octavia: And what exactly does she bring to the table?

Lenny: Booze, guns, and food. Anything else ya need, princess?

Octavia: To not be called princess. I have a name.

Lenny: And I have preferred pronouns~

Blitzo: Laddies and other... genders, can we argue later?

Octavia: Right. Okay so what's the plan?

Lenny: You'll be wearing this oversized dress and tell the guards that you're here to visit your "family" meanwhile we'll be under your oversized dress with my LOVELY guns! Then you'll get "lost" and wander down to the dungeon. We'll then come out from your oversized dress and shoot all the guards down there, break into the dungeon and save my besties' boyfriend and employees. Bam. Mission accomplished. Any questions?

Octavia: That wasn't a plan.

Lenny: I'm sorry but that was a flawless presentation of what we should do. Not my problem if Princess' don't have an education.

Octavia: I'm sorry, what? Blitzo why the fuck do we need her?

Blitzo: Lenny's a him and we need him because he's very smart and he called me his bestie and showers me with never ending compliments.

Lenny: See he's such a smart guy! His employees are so lucky to have him as their boss.

Blitzo: THANK YOU~

Octavia: We don't have time for you fucking baby dickheads to mess around. Why do I have to be the one to wear the dress?

Lenny: Because they're your "family" and you're the only one the guards will let in.

Blitzo: Yeah, I wanted to be the one to wear the big ass dress and look sexy as fuck while saving my boyfriend and employees... but no, I'm apparently the most wanted imp in hell so YOU get to wear the sexy ass dress while saving your dad.

Loona: Okay, enough gibberish. If we don't get this shit done soon, I'm not going to have enough booze left to stay awake.

Loona opens the portal, and they drive through in the van. They park their van in some of the fancy ass hedges.

Blitzo: Okay! Everybody ready?

Octavia: No... this dress is really itchy.

Blitzo: OOH OOH! I'll wear it!

Lenny: Want me to treat you like an average demon? Prove you can man up and wear a fucking itchy dress.

Octavia: I still don't see why we need her.