Save me Mick

Part 10

TW: self harm cuts and scars mentions of active harming
Danni POV
I put in a pair of shorts after I got out of the shower, not expecting anybody to come to my house. Sitting down I looked at my legs staring at the different red, purple, and pink marks all over my legs. I traced over the oldest one, remembering exactly why I made that mark.

....Flashback...
I was at my absolute lowest. So I did what I did to make it better. Added another cut. This one down my leg.
.....flashback over.....
I was at the lowest I'd ever been at that point. I heard a knock and without thinking I answered, briefly forgetting I was wearing shorts. It was Michaela. "Hey Da-oh my god." That's when I remembered the garment I was wearing instead of my usual pants. My eyes got glassy. She wasn't supposed to see this. No one was. Michaela started walking in so I quickly went into my room and threw on sweats. I walked back out to find Michaela on my couch. "H-hey M" I mumbled sitting on the opposite end of the couch. "Hey Danni. We have to talk about your legs." I knew it was coming but it still made my breath catch. "Do you clean those?" I shook my head not wanting to look Michaela in the eye. "Can I clean them for you now?" She asked unsure. I nodded kind of scared for her to see them upclose. I got up to put on the shorts again and Michaela stood to get the cleaning stuff. Once I came back out Michaela was sat with all the stuff. I sat down and she looked at me. "Ok, um I guess give me your leg?" She said awkwardly. I placed my leg on the couch kind of uncomfortable with how this was going. She quickly cleaned and bandaged the fresh cuts. Then she repeated the process of my other leg before I went and threw on some sweats while she put the stuff away. When I came back out she sat next to me. I closed my eyes and buried my face in my knees. "D? Please, talk to me. You can't keep doing this to yourself. Please talk to me." She practically begged. I didn't want to look at her so I just whispered "okay. I just can't sometimes. This is what I did for 5 and a half years. Everyone tried to help me at first but they were all drowning in grief themselves so they didn't do much." I took a breath "none of them knew it was like this" I mumbled. Michaela looked sad. "I can't believe you felt this bad. Im so so sorry D." She apologized "It's ok M you couldn't have known. Hell I thought you were dead so it's not like you would have known." I responded. Her phone began ringing and she picked it up. "Hey Jared. What's up? What, no I'm a bit busy. No well no okay fine whatever I'll be there soon I guess" she hung up. "I'm so sorry Danni Jared called, we've got a case.I apparently have to be there now. Don't worry I won't tell him I was with you." I nodded and she got up closing the door behind her. Once I was sure she was gone I broke down crying. My worst fear had come true. I'd hurt someone by showing them my problems. My mind flashed through a memory.

.....2 years after 828 disappeared flashback......
I downed another shot and then I felt a hand on mine. Lourdes. She took me home. "D? Anytime you need to talk, ever, day or night just call I'll be there." She told me.

........flashback over........

I dialed her number hoping that offer still stood.

L: hey Danni what's up?
D: remember that offer you made, about being open if I ever needed to talk? Does it still stand?
L: yeah of course! Want me to come over?
D: yeah sure if you wouldn't mind
L: of course not! I'll be over in 5 okay?
D: mhm
I hung up and I just sat waiting. I scrolled through my photo reel looking at all my pictures. Michaela and I, Lourdes and Michaela, Evie and I, and all of us together. I was still crying but the sobs had turned to quieter cries. I heard a knock and shouted, or tried to even though my voice broke "come in Lou!" And she walked in and appeared at the door of the living room. "Oh my god Danni what happened?" She sat down next to me. "M-Michaela she saw my legs." I looked down and fiddled with my hoodie drawstring. "Oh bubs. What happened?" I sighed and leaned against her. "I'd put on shorts and forgot. Then she showed up unannounced and um I uh answered the door and she just saw. I'm so stupid" I felt tears start to brim because I realized what I'd now done to Lourdes as well. Burdened her with my problems. I'd done it even worse to Lou then Michaela. I felt so stupid. "Go away go away get out get out. Get out!" I told the woman some part of me felt guilty for it and another didn't feel at all. She got up looking startled and left the house and there I laid just being numb. Soon enough I fell asleep there
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Hey hi whatever. Sorry for the long update I just didn't have a good stopping place. I realized I was having Lourdes be a pretty big character almost bigger than Michaela so I'm gonna adjust that in the upcoming chapters.
-Brooke