Sevendust - Feed
Siya's parties hadn't changed. Not one bit. I didn't think that they would, I mean you couldn't improve something that was already perfect so why try? If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
As I got in I was greeted with darkness, shining lights and couples who were grinding on each other like there was no tomorrow.
Jasmine would have hated this environment.
It didn't feel right, being at the party, alone especially.
Jasmines' presence wouldn't have made the party any more enjoyable, but she would have lifted my mood. We probably would have ended up making out or we would have found a room to go nap in.
Siya had a large house with many rooms and there was always one room that was always empty. You had to get to it early because everybody knew about the room, but it was always a different room every night so no one knew which room it was. They'd just barge into random rooms and hope that no one was inside doing it.
Even if we weren't able to find a room, we could have made out in my car. Not that making out would have made her love me. She'd love my lips, maybe, my car, perhaps, but she wouldn't love me per say.
That bothered me a little. I always told her that it was okay that she didn't love me. I thought over the suffocation plans and decided that it wasn't the best option. She'd probably end up dying anyways.
Being with her really made me happy, but what if she was unable to love me? Seeds of doubt had been planted in my head. How long would I be able to do all that I do for someone who didn't love me back? I didn't want my patience with her to wear thin.
This is why people lie about love, to evade this feeling. It's a horrible feeling.
I saw Siya off in the distance. I hadn't actually told him that I was coming so I decided now was the time, before I got too into the party.
As I approached him I heard bits of his conversation. He had to yell to be heard at his own party.
"So I'm thinking about going abroad, yeah. England, France America. I'm tired of a developing country; I want to see how the big boys are living. The only thing is I'd have to change my name. Now I don't have a white name so I'm just going to drop the 'y' in my name." The people he was talking to gasped, even I was surprised. "Yeah you know the singer Sia. Our names are pronounced identically, but the 'y' confuses them. If I can get them to think my name is pronounced like that, I won't have to worry about them messing up my glorious name." The people he was talking to laughed their heads off. I stifled a chuckled and with that Siya turned around and looked at me. His face broke into a wide and toothy grin.
"Terence my boy, my am I glad to see you bru! The alcohol is flowing and the weed is growing. Pick a substance, or better yet, use both. YOLO, you know what I'm saying."
I chuckled a little, until he tried to put a shot in my hand. I wasn't in the drinking mood though so I pushed it away. He looked at me like I'd slapped it out of his hand and then insulted his party.
"I don't drink or smoke anymore, sorry dude, that's just how I want to live my life. Straight edge."
"That's cool CM Punk, I can understand that. I really do appreciate you coming to my party though." He downed the shot, "I can see why you haven't been coming and that's understandable." He picked up another two shot and was about to down them, then he realized that I was still in front of him.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, I probably shouldn't do this in front of you, there's some coke over there." He motioned off somewhere, no where specific, he was already tipsy. He still had another shot in his hand that he intended to drink.
