secret BROKEN soul (R.V.V.D)

Chapter 15- A new beginning

OAKLEY POV:
It's been nearly a year and a half and I had my baby boy and named him mateo Vincent van Dijk ( think of it as MET AYO that's how you pronounce it ) as much as I hated what ruel did I still loved him deeply and it was his son not that I told him but I was finally beginning to feel happy again and this apartment felt like more of a home with metal here.
It's been a few months now I had made some new friends some of who all had kids which is good cause I can connect a lot more, we were all in the park and I was sitting watching the girls with their kids cause they were older and I was just on the picnic blanket playing which Metao when someone raptor my shoulder I stood up still with metal in view and spoke to the person " oh thank you" I said as the random person gave me flowers and walked away. As I went to sit down I swore I saw ruel or someone looking like him who am I kidding there is no way he would be up this end of the city I was about an hour away from him so I just focussed back on metal and played with him for a while when it started to get cold so I told the girls I would take metro home so he wouldn't get sick and pack up and left.

I was home now just watching a show with metao and noticed what the time was it was late so I sat metao in his high chair and gave him his baby food in a bowl and started on my dinner, while I was cooking I heard a knock on the door and cause I was busy I just yelled for them to come in and as they where I was dishing up the food when metao started to cry so I just put him down in the living room for him to play with the toys until he was hungry again or tired as I was coming back I finally look med at who it was that I had just let into my apartment it was ruel.

"Get out" was all I could say to him "what no I just wanted to check up on how you were" I was really confused now " I'm fine please leave," I said not wanting to deal with him "Oakley I don't even see anyone anymore I'm all alone and I'll I can and have been thinking about is you" what " how did you even find me ruel" I just wanted him to leave
" I saw you today in the park with a child and asked one of the girls where to find you so here I am," he said putting his hands in his pockets "did you like the flowers?" He asked "what that was from you why" I asked really confused now " I asked a guy to giv them to you coz I wasn't sure if it was you I just needed to see your face im sorry" he said kinda making me smile inside " how old is he" ruel said nodding to metao and I moved out of the way for him to see " um nearly 2 um you can go and see him and say hi if you want" I said knowing that he doesn't know that metao is his but the second he sees his face he will know, metao looks just like ruel it's scary " hi little guy" I watch as he bobbed down and let metao hold his massive fingers in his tiny hands "I'm ruel one of your mums ............ umm yea" he said looking up at me I just kinda looked at him then metao and sat down with them both " he's still learning to talk so yea sorry" I said smiling at him and he returned it back growing colour back into his pale skin from earlier " so can I talk to you about what happened or" he said and I just kinda looked away " look ruel if your look to come back into my life yes I want an explanation but I also want to forget that it happened so can we just forget it please" I said keeping my sight on metao " yea no of course but Oakley I'm so sorry for hurting you I'm such a fuck um and I know that I just want you to know I'm sorry" he said " I'll be back it's late I have to take him to bed "I said and I stood up and picked up metao walking him to his bed and putting him to sleep.

When I came back into the living room and saw ruel on the couch shaking his leg he stood up the second I came in " jeez ruel calm down I'm not the police" I said and walked over to where he was and sat down soon after so did he I could tell he was nervous "ruel can I ask you one thing that hasn't left my mind?" I asked not wanting to know the answer yesa of course" he said looking at me " did you love me or was it just I don't know a game" I said sounding heartbroken " what that shouldn't even be a question I did love you and still do Oakley the second you left I knew I had lost you and I knew I fucked up" I just cut him off " so who made the move you or Sunday " I said just staring into the blank walls "Sunday she was annoying me for those couple of days touching me and flirting with me and I told her to stop and then that morning you found us that was because she forced me and threatened me that she would hurt you so I just did as she said I'm so sorry Oakley I am" he said and I felt bad that I didn't let him explain and now I had someone to explain about to him.
"Hey you ok," he said tapping my shoulder as I zoned out " what yea well no I mean I don't know," I said not knowing what to say " so how are you and your new partner?" He asked and I was so confused that I raised my eyebrows at me " what" is all I could say " well the child's dad how is he what is his name" he said raising his eyebrows at the end oh no this will be fun

" ruel um I'm not with anyone and haven't been since we um broke up," I said hoping he would catch on but he just looked confused " wait so how old is he" oh no he's figured it out " 2 in a couple months" he just sat there for a second and then stood up " so either your joking or I'm what —" I just cut him off " ruel your his dad," I said sounding sorry for him " why didn't you tell me, Oakley," he said starting to tear up " cause ruel I didn't get a chance to you were to busy cheating on me and you said that you weren't ready so I just thought it would be better I'm sorry"
"nearly 2 years Oakley 2 years I have missed out on No I wouldn't have been ready hell I'm not now but I would have tried to make it work Oakley," he said crying

"I'm sorry," I said just looking at the ground feeling bad "Oakley I'm Not     Mad at you ok I'm just it's a lot ok," he said coming closer to me " no but I'm mad at myself," I say starting to tear up "um anyway um did you wanna stay longer and watch a movie with me or do you wanna leave," I said "um I can leave if you want" I just let out a Small laugh " ruel I just asked if you wanted to stay not if I wanted you to leave," I said smiling at him and he smiled back " so you want me to stay," he said making me blush " even after"
"Yes ruel even after like I said I want to forget about it ok," I said standing up and going to get the remote from the kitchen seeing as that is where I left it last but ruel stopped me by grabbing my hand and looking like he was going to say something but doesn't and just stares at me as I looked at him waiting for him to speak " um I'm a sorry um" was all he said and let go of my hand I just grabbed the remote and walked over to where he was " here you pick something and I'll go get changed," I said started to walk away "Oakley," he said making me turn around to face him and he just walked over to me and smashed his lips into me making me have butterflies, I kissed him back and the feeling of him back in my arms and back on my now dry lips

He picked me and pushed up against the wall and continued to kiss me but more passionately then a normal kiss he was starting to push him self into me more making me gasp a little and making him stop " what did I hurt you I should probably stop and go ho— I just pulled him back into my lips and kissed him we continued as he walked me to a bedroom and placed me on the bed now hovering over me and slowly moving his hands up and down my body reaching the back of my knee and lifting it up so it was over him and then continued to move his hands all over slowly lifting up my dress and taking it off me leaving me in just underwear I undone ruels pants and watched as he got undressed and once again he was hovering over me when metao started to cry and ruel stoped " do you want me to— " no just leave it he'll go back to sleep I said pulling him back in and kissing me " are you sure you wanna do this" he said put breath "yes ok stop talking" I said pulling him back in laughing he pulled off my underwear and pushed him self into me untill I was a moaning mess.

we both flopped into the bed soon after he had finished when ruel got up to put his clothes on and walked out my door "what are you doing?" I asked kinda upset he wanted to leave " I thought you would want me to leave or so" he said and i got up an picked up his hoodie that was on my side " well if you where planing on never coming back you would have failed as you would of had to come back for this" i said pulling it a little while walking to him and him smiling at me " i think i should go oakley i dont want to hurt you anymore" i just stood there kinda upset at what he had said " ruel i think it would hurt me more if you left then staying" he just stood there " so your willing to try this thing again" he said begining to smile " yes but i hink we should just start over espescialy with mateo and if we get some sleep" i said pulling him back to the bed and me floping in it pulling up the sheets and he just took off his shirt and got in to bed " did you do that just to make me get flusterd " i said smiling and nudging his shoulder " why are you flusterd" i just blushed " maymbe i didnt say i was" i said rolling over to tease him " oh she hides maybe she is flusted" he said pulling me into small spoon i just smile " yes yes i am flustered" was all i could say as i was focased on his breathing and grip on my wasit i missed this feeling.