My Blood On Her Lips (GXG)

1. I knew you were alive

"Selina, look at me." She shakes her head stubbornly and keeps her eyes averted from mine. Looking at the dark circles under her eyes and her way too pale skin I know she lied to me.

"You didn't have blood yesterday," I say to her, not as an accusation, but out of pain and worry. She refuses to look at me and I see her fangs splitting her lip as she bites down on it, trying to hold back.

"Selina, you have to drink. I don't want to lose you." I grab her hand. She glances at me and quickly removes her gaze. "I don't want to hurt you Soleil," she hisses through gritted teeth.

I put both of my hands on the hand I'm already holding, tracing circles on its back, trying to ease her. "It hurts more to see you like this."

I hug her gently and whisper into her ear. "I trust you. I know you wouldn't hurt me." She pulls away hesistantly. "That's exactly the problem. I don't trust myself. You don't know how hard it is to stop."

I switch my sitting position a bit so my side and my neck are closer to her. I pull my hair away to encourage her. "Please Selina."

She looks at me and her eyes flash dark red for a moment. She's trying not to give in to her thirst, but I see she's losing the fight.

She grabs my shoulders, leaning in slowly and I can feel her lips on my neck. It sends sparks through my body. I enjoy the feeling of her soft lips there for a moment, before I feel a striking pain when her fangs tear through my skin. I bite down a yelp, because I know she would stop if she heard it.

The burning pain is always almost impossible to bear, but for her I will. I try to steady my breathing as it gets shallower with every breath.

My vision is starting to blur and I see dark dots all around, I get light headed. It gets hot, but I'm not sure if this is because of blood loss or her lips on my neck. She pulls away and looks me directly in the eyes. I try not to show that it hurts under her gaze. So instead I focus on her face.

I can't help but be amazed everytime I look at her angelic features, even though she claims she is by no means an angel, but a vicious creature of darkness.

She was gorgeous even before she became a vampire, but now... Wow.

I look at her lips. My blood staining them, making them shine with red, looking so different on her pale face, ornated with green eyes and night-dark hair. She looks so guilty right now, looking at me with shame and regret.

"Why Soleil? Why are you doing this voluntarily? Why put yourself at risk for me?" She asks in a low whisper. "Because we're friends. Because I feel responsible for you. Because I care." Because I love you. I lift my hand to cup her cold cheek and she leans into the warmth of my touch. I brush my thumb slowly over her bottom lip, removing my blood from it.

-----

As I lay down to go sleep I look at her. She is sitting next to the mattress with her otherworldly elegance, guarding me while I sleep since she doesn't need to.

I look at her and think of the day I found out she's become a vampire.

I couldn't take it. It was too much to take in. 'How could she die? I should've gone with her on that plane. Then we'd both die that day. How could she leave me before I could tell her how I feel.'

I was standing alone by her grave. The funeral was over, everyone else had left already. But I just couldn't leave her. My heart didn't want to believe what my head was saying. 'She's dead, you idiot. She's gone.'

But her body hasn't been found. I didn't want to believe, I still hoped she had survived somehow. She's strong. She's amazing. She's always been my safe place. She's... she. I couldn't believe a light as bright as her could stop shining.

I was standing there, clenching a gift that I bought for her before the crash tightly in my hands. I kneeled down and looked at her picture on the gravestone.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I realized I'm talking to myself. I decided to speak aloud anyway.

"Hey..." I swallowed a lump in my throat and put the small wolf statuette with emerald eyes next to piles of flowers. "It reminded me of you... It's green like your eyes and you were always so strong and free, like a wolf. I bought it for you... but now you're... gone." My voice broke as I started crying. "It's so pathetic. Your body was never found. My stupid heart doesn't want to believe that you are dead. It feels like you are still here."

"Soleil..." I heard an almost soundless whisper. I slowly lifted my head to look in the direction of the voice. I thought I had gone crazy for a second. It was her. Selina was standing between the trees on the edge of the graveyard.

My eyes met a pair of green eyes that were looking at me cautiously. "You... What... How..." I was speechless.

I ran my eyes over her whole body, she looked unharmed. I looked at her face again. I let out a loud whimper and quickly ran those few metres to her.

I threw myself into her arms and cried loudly, of course because of happiness."I knew you were alive. I felt it wasn't true. I'm so happy you're alive." She gently pushed me away. "No, Soleil. I'm not..."

After that she told me that she's become a vampire. I wasn't scared of her. I promised that I'll stay with her. We escaped from our small town together.

That was a few weeks ago.

She still hates her new form, she still hates herself, even when I keep telling her she's amazing even if she's like that.

----

I smile thinking about all of that. I look at her secretly, in total happiness that she's here with me, that she trusts me with her secret of being a vampire.

I close my eyes to go to sleep and put my hand on the mark on my neck where she's bitten me. Those marks look a bit like hickeys. Oh, how I wish they were. Those marks are a proof of our special bond so I cherish them, even if it hurts when she bites me.

"What are you doing?" I flinch in surprise and open my eyes to find Selina standing next to my bed, looking down at me worried. "I've hurt you. Right?"

"No no no!" I stand up in panic and hold her shoulders. She's grown taller than me after she became a vampire. "It's just that I... Umm..." I stutter shyly. "I actually like those bites," I admit blushing.

She looks at me confused. "You... like me biting you? Why?" I look down, trying not to blush, and mummble an answer: "It feels like it's something special. Something that only we do, you know."

I'm too shy to look at her reaction so I keep looking down. But then I feel her arms wrapping around me as she picks me up bridal style and sits on the bed with me in her arms.

She smiles down at me softly. "I'm glad you're here with me now." She climbs under the covers with me in her embrace.

She pats my head. "Go to sleep now Soleil. Good night." I feel the words on my tongue, but I stop them. "Good night, Selina." I love you. I make myself comfortable and fall asleep, snuggled close to her.