My Blood On Her Lips (GXG)

2. I'm a monster

"Selina? Are you sure that's a good idea?" I ask her while walking behind her in a dark alley. It's completely dark aside from a flickering light here and there, sometimes reflecting in the puddles from last night's rain. The walls around us are sprayed in graffiti, random hate words and slurs. There's some dirty looking black dumpsters along the wall. There's no sound except the sound of our steps. It's giving me chills.

"You didn't have to come with me," shrugs Selina. I cling to her arm, scared. "But it's scary in the warehouse without you." She rolls her eyes, but smiles softly. "You scaredy cat," she says as she pats my head.

"And no, that's not the best idea. But I have no other choice, Soleil." I look up at her. "You can drink mine..." She stops and looks at me sternly. "No. I don't want to hurt you if I don't have to." I try to oppose, but her eyes stop me. "Okay," I submit.

After a few turns we arrive to a dead end. "It's behind this wall. I'll be right back. Don't worry." In the meantime I look around, noticing there's no one around. Looking back to her I nod unsurely.

Just after she turns away to start climbing and I grab her wrist. "What if you get caught?" She chuckles. "You think so low of me?" She smirks. "No, no. It's just that they probably have a CCTV," I say sheepishly. "So what? As far as anyone else is concerned I'm dead."

With unhuman strength and speed she reaches the top of the wall before I even see her move. "I'll be alright, Soleil." With these words she disappears.

I lean on the wall in a dark corner. Stealing blood from a hospital sounds like the stupidest idea ever, I sigh. She looked hella hot right now though, I gaypanic at my own thoughts and shake my head.

Lost in my own thoughts, I didn't hear footsteps coming closer, until they were just a few steps away. I panic in fear and try to cower in the corner, but it was too late. A group of 4 men is coming my way.

"Selina," a quiet scared whimper comes out of my mouth. The men are already standing a few steps away from me. It's dark so I can't see their faces, but I can see a glimpse of light on a knife in the hand of the furthest one.

"Quite the find," one of them chuckles. "What do you think, boys?" I gulp in fear and look around for an exit. I'm trapped... I realize and feel my heartbeat pick up.

The one that was talking, seemingly a leader, approaches me and puts his hand on my waist. I scrunch up my face in disgust. "Leave me alone," I whisper fiercely, trying to push him away. "And what if I don't want to?" The other three laugh at that.

The man holds up a strand of my hair and chuckles: "You're a feisty one-" Suddenly a force from above pushes him on the ground. "Selina," I cry out relieved.

She jumps to the one with the knife and kicks his wrist. He drops the blade and she picks it up. The three other men back up a few steps.

The leader stands up while cursing, blood running from his nose. "Who the fuck are you!" She turns around and I freeze as I see her eyes shining bloody red. She says nothing as she approaches the man.

He sneers and barks at his followers to do something. But they just stand there petrified, as they did notice what their leader didn't.

Selina is extraordinary.

And she's out for blood.

She suddenly bolts forward, into my direction. She grabs me and puts me safely behind her back. "Soleil. Please don't watch this," she whispers, full of emotion.

I obey her. I know she will protect me so I close my eyes without fear. I hear footsteps running away, I assume it's the other three men.

The next thing I hear is Selina's voice, low and menacing. "You brought this to yourself. How dare you touch her," she growls. That sound... Soleil what are you thinking about! I hear a scared yelp next. And lots of weird sounds of breaking, splattering and tearing.

After a few seconds everything is quiet. "Don't open your eyes yet." She picks me up and runs back to our hiding place. "I don't want you to see me like this... I'll come back right away, but I have to wash myself. Is it alright?" She says sadly. I nod, still in shock.

When she puts me down on our bed she runs out. I open my eyes slowly and lie down.

She's back almost immediately. She sits next to me on the bed and asks: "Are you alright? You're not hurt, are you?" I look at her up and down and see no traces of what happened less than half an hour ago.

"Soleil?" We make eye contact and I smile at her thankfully. "I knew you'd come," I say and hug her tightly. She wraps her cold body around mine and hums comfortingly. "Thank you for saving me! I l-" I mummble in her shoulder and stop myself just the right time. "Hm?" I just shake my head and keep hugging her.

-----

"You should go to sleep now Soleil." I look at her and see that she's hiding a blood bag behind her back. "You can drink it while I'm here you know, Selina," I look at her softly. She shakes her head with a haunted expression and leaves the room swiftly.

I sigh sadly. What can I do to show her that it's alright? I get up slowly and follow her. I climb up the shaky metal stairs to a platform in the warehouse. There's an open window leading to a roof of a lower part of the building.

There she is.

I climb through the window carefully and slowly approach her. She's sitting and hugging her knees. Wordlessly I sit down next to her and wait for her to start talking if she wants to.

She hides her face in her hands first, then looks up at the stars. I can see tears glistening in her star-illuminated eyes.

I cautiously touch her to see if she minds. She moves away and whispers: "Soleil, I'm a monster... I'm dangerous... Please leave me alone."

"You're not a monster!" I whisper-yell. "You saved me," I take a hold of her hand. "It's not your fault for being like this. At least you are ali- here with me now," I look her in the eyes and try to let her see that I'm not afraid of her.

"But I kill... killed him... I lost control and I- I-" She sobs and I quickly pull her into a hug. I pat her hair as she buries her face in my shoulder. "It will be alright. What's done is done. We can't help it. But don't beat yourself up because of this. I'm here alright. I'll always be here." I lean my head on hers.

"No you won't," she sobs, "I'm immortal. And you will die one day." I don't know what to say to that so I just keep stroking her hair. She continues in a low, sad voice: "This is my life now." She pauses and laughs sadly. "Is this even life? I'm not alive." "Selina..." I feel tears in my eyes.

"I will keep hurting other people. Wait, not other, I will keep hurting people. I'm not even a human anymore-"

"Stop this nonsense right now! Selina, what's making you human is your heart. Your humanity. You're an amazing person and more of a human than that scum," I say with a few tears rolling down my face.

I lift her face up and look deeply into her eyes. "You're amazing." I tell her heartfeltly. "Why can't you understand this? Why can't you love yourself like I do?" In this moment I realize my words. She looks at me in shock and repeats my words slowly, like she can't believe what she's hearing. "You love me? Like love love?"

I look at the stars and decide that I might as well just admit it now. "Yes Selina. I am deeply in love with you."