The Wallflower

Apologies

A/N: I was gonna have this chapter be their engagement ball and the next chapter be their wedding but I realized I needed to address some things before all of that. And they're pretty big. I'm sure y'all can guess. Anyways, it's another dialogue heavy chapter (what do you expect from me at this point) I hope y'all enjoy and I hope I did it justice.
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Penelope Featherington had never been more nervous than she was at that very moment. Her stomach churned into a tangle of knots as the carriage bounced and swayed and jostled down the rough country road. She peered out of the window to try and distract herself from her thoughts but it was no use. She couldn't escape the dread inside.

Colin glanced over at Penelope when he heard her take a deep shaky breath. He reached his hand out to take hers and gave it a small squeeze. She turned to face him and gave him a very small smile out of politeness but he noticed it didn't reach her eyes. Instead, her eyes were swimming with fear and anxiety and he wished he could take all of it away but he couldn't. Penelope turned back to face the window again.

He looked to Eloise who was still rambling on about how this was all a bad idea and why she had to come and they should just turn around. Colin cleared his throat.

"Eloise." He said getting her attention. She glanced at him quickly. He simply shook his head and shift his eyes to Penelope. "Sorry." She huffed and crossed her arms.

They sat in silence for but a few moments before Eloise spoke again. "It's just, what if she doesn't even receive us? What are we gonna do if, when Pen tells her the truth, she kicks us out?" She asked.

Colin glanced at Penelope who met his gaze with the same questions looming behind her eyes. She was terrified and he didn't know how to calm her down because deep down, so was he. "I don't think she would do that but if she does then we will just have to accept her response and go back home. That is all we can do." He spoke quietly and then it was his turn to stare out the window.

He was reminded of his last visit to Romney Hall. He had visited out of guilt and needed to apologize to Lady Crane for how he acted, but she hadn't been angry at him for his reaction the previous season. She'd been angry he had visited her in the first place. His thoughts took him back their last words.

"If you would simply open your eyes to what is in front of you, then you might see there are those in your life you already make happy." She said to him as he was leaving. He stopped and turned around.

"And who might that be?" He asked her. She sighed. "You have your family. You have," she paused and looked at him. "Penelope."

Colin's brow knitted together in confusion. "Penelope?" He questioned.

What did Penelope have to do with any of this. Sure he enjoyed her conversations and felt they had become good friends the last few months but why would Lady Crane bring her up?

"You have many people who care about you. Seek them out, because your future will certainly not be found in the past with me."

Colin was brought back to the present when the carriage hit a rather nasty bump in the road and he felt Penelope squeeze his hand tightly. He looked over at her as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. It was then that he realized what Lady Crane had meant when she said he had Penelope.

Marina knew of Penelope's feelings for him. She had tried to make him open his eyes but he was too stupid to understand. His heart ached knowing the pain he had put both of them through simply for not seeing what was right in front of him. How could he have possibly been so blind?

Colin could kick himself for being such a self absorbed arse. He'd been so caught up in how he was affected by everything that happened, he didn't stop to think of  how it affected everyone around him. He made a silent promise that he would make things right. And he would be kept to his promise sooner rather than later, as the carriage rolled to a stop outside Romney Hall.