His Hidden Wife

Chapter 58

Alexandra's p.o.v:

"Hello Alexandra" he said.

I looked up and saw Raymond standing on the other side of the small hallway leading into the living room, I froze I didn't know what to do, I waved at him and gave him I small forced smile. Why, couldn't I talk about him, I slowly walked towards him, but suddenly I couldn't get an closer, I know I had told Valeria that I needed him, but now that I saw him, all those feelings left me and all I felt was hurt. He made a move to come closer to me and I quickly stepped back. I saw a flash of hurt cross his eyes and he didn't come any closer to me. "Thank you" I said to him and I came towards him, he held out his hand to help me sit down on sofa with him. I let go of his hand and placed mine on my lap. "How have you been" he asked. "I-I'vve b-been o-okay" I fumbled out. "Alexandra I" he started off but then stopped, before pulling out my wedding ring and showing it to me. I looked at him in shock and was at a lost of words. "You don't seem happy to see this" he said. "Are you trying to give this back to me" I asked him. "Yes it belongs to you" he said. "Raymond before you give to me or try to give it to me, I think we need to talk, don't you think" I said. "Do think you won't be taking it back, Alexandra" he asked me. "I think we need to talk before I can answer that question" I said. "Okay I'll respect that" he said. "Raymond that night I was awake and heard everything that was said... Raymond that night I was hurt, our son could've been hurt and the first thing you do is worry about if anybody from the outside saw what happened...Raymond if anything would've happened to our son, I wouldn't forgive you... Why Raymond!? Why??" I cried. "Alexandra I'm sorry" he said. "NO, no don't say sorry because that doesn't fix what happened, listen Raymond I thought I had figured it out, on why you did things the way you did, but the things you said hurt me more then anything ever will, so help me understand what went wrong" I cried out. "Alexandra I never meant to say that" he said coming closer to me. "No, no please stop you see, what you don't seem to know is that when people say things in anger they mean it, because it was something that they were holding inside of them that needed to come out, so tell me if not now then when... a few years down the road when we have a stable family and all of sudden you don't want the life your living" I said crying. "No Alexandra it's not like that" he said. "I don't understand you Raymond I really don't, listen to me Raymond the last thing I want is for you to have an regrets about us" I said. I left him speechless, he looked at me and was at a lost for words. "You see, you your self don't know the answer to my question, Raymond I don't think you know just how bad I was hurt, not just physically but emotionally too, but the worst part is no one once again respected my wishes" I said. He looked at me with curious look. I looked me to see that he honestly didn't know what I was talking about, "I had asked them to let me see you at my own pace, I had asked them not to let you come until I was ready, no matter how long it took and no matter how you felt about it, because right now I don't want to be with you, until I know what it is that you really want" I said. Raymond still hadn't said a word, but he had both of his hands tightly clasped together and looked lost, I then took a deep breathe and pushed myself closer to him, I took his hands in mine and his eyes snapped up to meet mine, he then pulled me into his arms and placed his head on my shoulder, it was kind of hard with my belly in the way, but we made it work. "Listen I know your not going to like what I'm going to say but, we need a real break, this time by ourselves with no one trying to bring us together, I'm going to be honest with you, because you've been a great man to me and I love you with all my heart. Raymond Messi you are the love of my life, I know no matter what happens your the only man for me, but right now I know you have a lot to figure out on your know, without me in the picture" I said. "Alexandra" he whispered. "No listen to me, this is the right thing for us right now, we may not like but in order for us to stay together we need this" I said. "Alexandra I have been meaning to tell you that I love you, I want you to be it for me as well, but it seems that along the way I got lost and I hurt you. and that is the last thing I ever want to do, yes I messed up in the fact that I forgot that you are not used to this, the world I live in, I should have noticed it the day at the market, you are not used to hiding you never had to, I'm sorry my love. If I ever made you feel that way, but you are my equal, I should have listened to you and everyone else who tried to tell me that I was in the wrong but for the longest time I never had to take in any one else's feelings but mine, and no that is not an excuse for the way I acted and how I came off to you, listen I never felt this way towards anyone and as crazy has it may seem, not even with Valeria, you on the other hand are the most nicest and sweetest person I know, your kindness and willing to do anything to make sure everyone else is okay and things are taken care of, I love that about you and I hope that I'm not to late and that you let me win your heart back, but don't make this easy for me, make me work for your love, because I own you that much, your worth that and so much more for dealing with a man like me" he said. "Now please let me do this and I'll set everything up for you to get what you want, I'll stop anyone from coming to you that is not your nurses and doctors, I promise you that" He said while getting down on one knee and taking my left hand in his. "Alexandra Messi, will you take this idiot who is helplessly in love with you, has your husband, but this time I will be the man, that you need, I promise to love you until the end of time, so Mrs. Alexandra do you accept me has your husband but this time forever" he said. I looked at him and smiled at him, this was the sweet guy I knew and fell in love with, "I do" I said with happy tears rolling down my face, he then slipped my ring on my ring and leaned up to kiss me. "Now that I know that I still have a wife, let's set this up for you, your own alone time without any of us" he said. "Thank you for this, my chest feels like a giant weight has been lifted from my chest" I said honestly. " I am the one who needs to be saying thank you, you helped me realize that I still have a lot of work to do in order to be the man you need, and also to take time off and spend time with my family, I guess it's time to go find Raymond" he said.....