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I'M A WRECK.
We're staying in a hotel for the night. I want to be full of energy, and my unconditional love for her, when we finally see each other.
Tomorrow we'll spend the entire day together. If she'll let me, I want to wake up beside her, like I used to.
Everyone is already asleep, all close together, on a king sized bed. Denki's got everyone beaten with his loud snoring. I wish I could say the same.
Thinking about tomorrow makes me beyond anxious. I want everything to be perfect. Something in me doesn't feel right. I'm so close to her, but I feel so far.
What is this new feeling? It's like a mix of fear and worry—way stronger than anxiety, it's like a warning...but for what?
I feel a hand on my shoulder, and then she sits right next to me, on the edge of the bed.
"You feeling alright?" She asks, though I can hardly hear her voice with my heart beating so loudly.
It's that feeling, again. I cover my mouth and race to the bathroom. This time, it's much stronger than before.
"Kai!" She hurries to my side, lifting the lid of the toilet for me.
Immediately, a large amount of pent up emotions, exits my mouth. The feeling is terrible.
"Oh, Kai." She rubs circles around my back. "I'm sorry for making you eat so much spicy food," she says. I shake my head.
My stomach isn't sensitive to that. I eat spicy things on the daily. Even so, I won't tell her the truth behind these emotions.
Sitting on the cold bathroom floor, against the cupboard, underneath the sink, Myah cleans my mouth with a damp towel.
"You don't need to feel insecure, Kai. You are beautiful. How many times do I need to remind you?"
"Sorry. Guess that makes me a selfish person, doesn't it? Since I'm basically using your compliments to make me feel better...I'm sorry, I don't mean to."
She puts the towel down and opens her arms, inviting me in for a hug. I lean forward and accept her into my arms.
A hug is exactly what I need, right now. My head hurts. These nerves got the best of me.
"Kai?" Another voice says. I turn to see Ejirou standing at the doorway. His hair is all messed up, but he looks wide awake and worried about me.
"Myah," He motions for her, "come here, I'll talk to him."
She lets go of me and walks over to Ejirou, giving him a quick hug, with his consent. "I don't like seeing him like this, please help, Eji," She whispers to him.
Once she's gone, he closes the door behind him and joins me on the floor. For a few minutes, we sit in complete silence. I'm sure he did that to let me regroup myself before I vent my truth to him.
