a young lady finds herself inking down the words her heart could never say to another soul. these very virtual pages hold memories, moments, and musings from her childhood. moments that are now turning into a mere figment of her brain which are told...
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there never has to be a why to exist when you're young.
because I would—
devour anything I could get my hands into, fall into a dream that lasts however long I want it to, dart to an endless abyss for galaxies to wishful thinking to thereto. trapezing through a landscape that will never leave. time would only become a construct for those that lost. a world that is lost to me as I am lost to the world.
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*･ﾟ ✦ hiya dearies!
anytime I don't update ephemerality, as in 24 hours after the last chapter I publish- I feel an itch. a literal itch scratching me, demanding for me to update. see here, I might be on summer break but it feels like I'm close to being as busy I would have with classes going on. and, don't get me wrong, I really reallyyy wanna update every single day but it's just not happening?!? even though I'm on summer break. even if I don't have classes.
the thing is- I've been working myself off for the last 7-ish months for my finals/exams that were in may. although it has been well into a month now that they've been over, I'm still very anxious and stressed about my results (they come out in july btw) I'm not still relaxed/you know the feeling of happiness after you finish something really hard- that hasn't appeared for me. yet. that's why on some days I might update back to back but in other days, I can't even bring myself to click that publish button. fyi: chapters are stockpiled but I need to edit/format the chapters before I can actually click publish.
which brings me to something else, it doesn't matter what is going on in your life but please do take it easy. it takes so much of a hooman soul to just show up each day and simply exist. to eat. to sleep. to talk. to just breathe. it takes a lot of energy and time. energy and time which is exhausting. hence, it doesn't matter if you are or aren't going through an experience like mine. either way, take it easy because heck, life is exhausting. and it's time people on social media accepted that before placing gliz and glamour first. take your time. read that book. drink that smoothie. eat that cheescake. take it easy and do whatever you want to, to make yourself feel at peace with the everyday ritual of being 'you.'
qotd: this isn't something about the chapter ;) rather it is a check-in, how are you today/how's your day going? if you don't feel like writing in words then just put down the emoji that best represents you right now <3 (see below) how was this chapter? any thoughts about this poem? reaction/emoji's are always welcome :D constructive criticism is always welcome!
❤️ I need love 🧡 My days are going okay 💛 It's going amazing 💚 I'm at peace 💙 I'm feeling a bit sad 💜 I need support 🤎 I'm holding on 🖤 My heart can't take it anymore 🤍 Everything is going too fast 💔 I feel like I'm falling apart ❤️🔥 There are a lot of emotions in me ❤️🩹 I am healing ❣️ I am finding love for myself 💕 I want someone to be there for me 💞 I feel like I'm drifting 💓 I can barely breathe 💗 I wish I could find love 💖 I need a good day to happen 💘 I hope today is easy 💝 Today has been a gift to me 💟 I love the people around me 💌 last one, for y'all out there (even if I mention it in every chap, this just feels more special no? eheh <3) I LOVE YOU!!! I'M SO GLAD YOU EXIST!!! THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE TODAY!!!
～ sylvia ✨
* * * keep breathing, <3 yourself, be + always, something is always possible, stay safe & ily ;)
hope you have a wonderous day/night <3
QOTD: "Don't bury your failures. Let them inspire you."
