Momma made me stay home after she found me passed out on the floor,room a fuckin mess and brain not even functioning properly.
I watched the curtains flow with the wind-the curtains she'd forced me to open on some you need light in your life baby,let it in.
She didn't get it,she thought that maybe I was still mad about them hiding our generational curse from me,she didn't know that her strong daughter-or so she thought- was sulking over a boy she hadn't even known for a year.
All the pills were finally wearing me down,my head throbbing as my vision blurred,my steps faltering as I tried to walk over to my bed.
"Momma!mama I can't see!" I heard her feet pound on the stairs before she burst through my door,gently guiding me over to my bed.
"Maybe you should lay down..."
"Momma I hate these pills,it's always like this after I take em." I think she scowled at me,pulling the fleece over me and brushing the hair out of my face. "Baby...they're your only way to live."
"What's the use of prolonging the inevitable?hearts will get broken,love will hurt,people will die and there's nothing you can do about it." I felt bad when I heard her sniff,patting my head before I heard my bedroom door click and I was left alone again.
***
Mel:I had a dream you didn't want me anymore.
Kyrie:you crazy?!
Mel:so you're not leaving me?
Kyrie:never that, shawty.never that. You know I'd shoot a nigga for you!
Mel:man stop playin,you don't even have a gun.
Kyrie: don't be too sure 'bout that. Awusho,wamuhle njeh,yini?(say,why are you so pretty?)
I blushed,putting my phone face down as I rolled my eyes back and grinned like an idiot,I didn't know what he'd said but the way he looked at me felt warm and secure, it was safe.
Kyrie:ayee lil mama don't be hiding that face from me,I think you're really beautiful and you need to know that! Baby you my errthang,you all I ever wanted...
Mel:nigga stop playin,I gotta go.
Kyrie:lil mama!
Mel:yeah?
He blew a kiss,and I caught it,blushing as I switched my phone off
***
Fresh tears fell from my eyes as I reminisced,clasping my shirt as I tried to soothe the ache in my heart-was he lying from the start?
I reached for my phone and scrolled until I found his name,leaving him a text before I fell asleep.
_________
"Mel?hey wake up" a deep voice whispered and I stirred awake,rolling away from the voice and scrunching my face in annoyance. "You and I both know I'm not leaving,so get up already." I threw a pillow at Devon,kicking my legs out frustratedly and opening my eyes,tears of relief falling from them when I saw him standing there grinning down at me.
"What do you want?"
"Well that's not nice... we're going to Manhattan tonight,the guys were wondering if you wanted to come. And I'm not calling you out or anything,but you promised."
"Voooon..."
"I know,I know. We'll buy you food?" I jerked up,running into my bathroom as I heard him cough to hide a laugh,shuffling around my room before he fell silent.
I showered as fast as a person with a migraine could,whipping on my lounging outfit and some J's- spraying my fresh cornrows that my mom had done for me in the morning.
I walked out and found him passed out on the loveseat,arm thrown over his eyes with spread legs and a peaceful look engulfing him.
He looked pretty.
"Ma!I'm sleeping,don't come in here!"
They had a ford Ranger that was identical to my dad's outback,shiny rims and blacked out windows,a fresh shade of charcoal coating it-it looked masculine. "Who's car is that?" I blurted out what I had been secretly wondering since the range rover,they were too young to have such cars.
"Chile you know I can't be workin my ass off everyday without sumn to show for it" Frost said,dangling his keys in my face and I swatted his hand away,"you're just a kid."
"Mmhmm, I do look young don't I?" He laughed,running his hand across his chin for effect and I laughed along with him.
I looked around,spotting Shadow & Midnight,Tangerine and Everest,Mist nowhere to be seen.
"Our boy Mist got sick."
"Huh" Midnight mumbled,looking behind me thoughtfully before shrugging and hopping into the backseat of the car.
We hit some sorta club out there,Frost supplying us with all the substance around. Shadow seemed kind of surprised when I downed his cup of punch,brushing his hand over his lavender waves as I signalled him for more. "Devon didn't tell me you'd be drinking tonight,think he'll be okay with this?"
"Don't be a mom Shadow,what are you?his wife?" Purple fluid flew out Frost's nose as he laughed,the stubble he'd grown on his jaw giving to the illusion that he really was old.
"How old are you anyway,ma?"
He pushed my cup infront of me,scowling at me as his eyes alternated between the cup and my face.
"23,Frost is 25,Everest is 19 and Devon is 18." I nodded,gulping the drink down before moving over to Everest's side.
He had crack and snow lined up on the table,joints rolled up there as he passed them out,skipping me as he passed the lighter out.
I glanced at my phone,a message from Kyrie flashing across the screen and my mood grew sour.
Kyrie: you can't just accuse me of having a girl in Queens!the hell is yo problem?
Mel:fine. But what about that video of the girl with her thighs in your lap that was on your Instagram?she was grabbing up on you in all the wrong ways so don't lie about it!
Kyrie:fine. I won't lie,I did cheat. I'm sorry,I wanted to tell you but bengingaz kanjani without hurting you.i didn't know.
Mel: you cheated on her with me didn't you?
Fresh tears built around my eyes,and I grabbed the blunt from Devon and pulled real hard,the familiar burn of the smoke somehow hurting but soothing the wound in my heart that bled more as I thought about it,this nigga played me.
He looked even more surprised when I took a pill and popped it in my mouth,gulping down more alcohol to hold it all down.
"Melanie! put that down!" He reached over to pull it from my mouth, Tangerine lifting his hooded eyes like his brain didn't realise what was happening around him,I smiled and he smiled back,he didn't have a clue.
Frost swiped all the drugs off the table and clapped his hands to get the powder off his palms.
I jerked up,making for the restrooms when a hand gently grabbed my wrist grasping my attention,
"Mel I don't know what's going on with you,but this is no way to fix it.
You're drunk,I'm not sure you really wanna take these drugs...so wait until you're sober before you do anything okay?"
"Nigga don't fuckin touch me,I gotta go!"
A girl in the bathroom had a half full bottle of Hennessy in her lap,a box of tissues beside her as she cried and wiped her makeup off messily.
"Hey are you oky-okay?" My speech came out slurry as I made to kneel infront of her,her pretty blue eyes roaming my face before she burst into fresh tears,a defeated cry escaping her mouth,I cried too.
"I'm pretty...r-right?"
I nodded,helping her messily wipe the tears off her face,"then why did he lie to me? Why did he cheat?"
My own face scrunched up as I pulled my arms up to wipe the tears off my face,a newfound determination overcoming me, I was gonna BREAK Kyrie if it was the last thing I did.
"Girl,I'm not saying you should chest,but break him. If he can,surely you can hurt him too! Niggas ain't shit,we just love em cause we need em to make babies!they don't even care enough to remember Valentine's Day!"
She looks at me,then nods with a lopsided grin as she offers up the bottle to me,I gladly take it and gulp down the hot liquid as it burns it's way slowly down my throat,
"So...niggas ain't shit?"
"Ye they ain't shit!"
I didn't know why I was so loud when there was only two of us in the room but it felt good as I watched her sprawl herself across the floor with a grin,it felt good knowing I wasn't the only one suffering.
Everyone was standing outside the bathroom when I stepped out,and I almost burst out laughing as they all visibly relaxed when they saw me.
"Are you okay?" Everest was speaking in slow motion and his nose was slightly bigger,I laughed so hard my stomach began hurting.
It felt like I was floating,all the stress and worries on my mind dissolving into bunnies with horns.
I couldn't even remember why my face was wet,I just felt good and I was fuckin happy
YOU ARE READING
Coulda been
Teen FictionI wrote this while I was 16 and had absolutely no intentions of publishing it. BUT... Melanie Wynters is a sophomore with baggage that isn't even hers,she's on a rollercoaster and Kyrie Jackson seems to be her saving grace-until he isn't. This book...
