"Do I Deserve It?" (Eren's second chance) (AOT)

19. My Biggest Secret

AUTHOR'S POV:

One week had passed since Eren completed his second last mission. He had been thinking about how to tell Armin and Mikasa the truth. He was afraid that they might leave him after hearing his biggest secret. But, he wanted them to know the truth.

Eren was now sitting on the walls, looking at the sunset. He was deep in thoughts.

'I don't want to lose them but... I have to do this... Tonight...'
.

It was now night time. During dinner, Eren was nervous. Mikasa and Armin could notice that too. They looked at eachother and nodded.

"Eren, is something wrong ?" Mikasa said.

Eren looked down and said,

"No... Can we talk after dinner... You, Armin and me..."

Mikasa and Armin looked at eachother with surprise.

"Oh... Ok Eren." Armin said.

Eren just nodded and finished his dinner.
.

It was now time for Eren to reveal his biggest secret. He was leading the way to the pond. He was shaking a bit. Soon they arrived infront of the pond.

An awkward silence fell upon them. Then, Mikasa spoke up.

"Eren, are you ok? You have been acting weird ever since you accomplished the mission. Is everything alright ?" Mikasa asked with concern.

Eren then started explaining.

"Mikasa.. Armin, I am going to reveal my... Biggest secret..." Eren said, looking down.

Mikasa and Armin were surprised. They had forgotten about Eren saying he had a secret.

After a moment, Armin spoke up.

"What secret Eren?"

Eren took a deep breath and said,

"I don't know if you guys will believe me or not but... I am from the future..."

Mikasa and Armin were confused and shocked. They looked at eachother.

"Eren. Are you joking ?" Armin asked.

"No... I am from the future... A horrible future..."

They looked at eachother again.

"What do you mean ?" Mikasa asked.

"I was given a second chance to fix everything after my death... That's why I knew everything that was going to happen..."

Then Mikasa and Armin realised that he knew a lot from the beginning. Mikasa quickly hold his hands and spoke up.

"Eren, are you really from the future ?"

Eren couldn't look into her eyes. He then continued after a moment.

"Yeah... I am 4 years back into the past. I died at 19 and when I woke up, I was 10 again... Then my future self explained everything to me..."

They were looking at him with concern.

"Eren... How did you... Die ?" Armin asked with hesitation.

Eren didn't say anything. Mikasa then shook his shoulder.

"Eren ?"

When he looked up, Mikasa saw that Eren was crying. Before she could say anything, Eren spoke up.

"Mikasa... Killed me..." Eren quietly  said.

Armin and Mikasa were horrified. Mikasa started tearing up. She couldn't believe that she could even do something like this.

"Eren... Why did she... Kill you ?" Armin asked in a sad tone.

"To stop the... Rumbling..."

They looked at him with a alarmed face.

"To stop the rumbling ? Why did you start the rumbling?" Mikasa asked with desperation.

After a moment, Eren spoke up.

"I started the rumbling and.... Killed 80% of... World population outside the walls..." Eren said looking down.

Mikasa's hand left his shoulder. She put her palm on her mouth. Armin was terrified. They couldn't believe what Eren just said. After some moments, Mikasa spoke up.

"Why did you... Do that Eren ?" Mikasa asked in a calm tone.

Eren dropped to his knees and broke down. Then he spoke up.

"I... I didn't have any other choices... You and me were chosen by Ymir to free her from the very beginning... I couldn't do anything..." Eren said between cries.

Mikasa and Armin were speechless. Then Eren continued.

"It was Mikasa's love for me that freed Ymir but Ymir gave me a second chance so that I could fix everything... I never got to confess my love to Mikasa... My life back then was... Horrible.."

"Eren?" Mikasa asked softly.

Eren then explained everything to them. Mikasa and Armin were so shocked to know that it was Eren who got his mother killed. But, they later understood that he didn't have any other choices.

After explaining everything, he broke down again. He couldn't stop crying.

Armin and Mikasa just let him cry. They understood that Eren was never free. He suffered alone for long 4 years. They were glad that Eren got a second chance to fix everything.

After a few minutes, Eren stopped crying. Then Mikasa spoke up.

"Eren ? Is that why you would cry every night when we were 10 ?" Mikasa asked in a smooth voice while kneeling down beside him.

Eren just nodded. He didn't have the courage to look at his friends.

A moment later, Mikasa lifted his chin and made him look at her. She then slowly leaned forward and kissed him. Eren was surprised but he kissed her back.

After a moment, they broke the kiss. Then Mikasa spoke up in a soothing voice with a smile.

"Eren, we understand. You did that to save us. Don't be hard on yourself now. See, you fixed everything this time. Don't worry, we are not mad at you."

Mikasa then kissed his forehead and helped him to stand up.

Eren was still crying. Then Armin spoke up with a smile.

"Yes Eren. You did that so that we could live a long life. As Mikasa said, we are not mad at you. You fixed everything Eren."

Eren was still looking down. Then Mikasa and Armin hugged him. He was surprised a bit but hugged them back and cried.

"Thanks... Guys..."

He was glad that he got that off his chest after 5 long years.

He found comfort in his friend and lover's hug. He smiled a bit, knowing that he fixed everything and saved his friendship too.

After a few moments, they pulled away from the hug. Armin decided to leave them alone. After Armin left, Mikasa quickly hugged Eren again. Eren hugged her back.

They stayed there like that for a few minutes. Eren didn't want to let go of the hug but Mikasa pulled away.

She put her hands on his face and wiped his tears. She had a smile on her face. It comforted him. Then she spoke up in a soothing voice.

"Eren, I believe you. Don't be hard on yourself. Ok ? You did everything right this time. All those people are alive too. So, don't think about it so much."

Eren just nodded and said,

"Thank You Mikasa... For not hating me..."

Then they shared another kiss before going back to sleep.
.

Eren thought about one thing before dozing off to sleep.

'Thank you... Ymir...'

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