The Paying Guest

xxii - confessions

Isabella

"Water or vodka?" Tyler asked me as we entered the penthouse. "Vodka." I answered tiredly while walking towards the couch to sit.

Tyler walked away somewhere inside the house. I didn't bother looking for him, and I was too tired to lift my lash. Of course, there was nothing physically wrong with me, but emotionally, I was on the ventilator.

Sheila's words were weighing heavily on my mind and heart. I couldn't live with the guilt of depriving Vernon of the happiness of knowing that I am carrying his only blood family.

"My hands are aching." I heard Tyler say. I then noticed that he was holding a glass with clear liquid for no idea how long.

I apologized quickly and took the glass. As I was about to take a sip, I remembered the answer I gave him earlier when he asked if I needed water or vodka. I looked at Tyler, who was sipping on his alcohol.

"It's water." He answered without looking at me.

I couldn't help but chuckle at that before gulping the entire glass of water. Tyler let out a deep sigh beside me and threw his head back. He closed his eyes and just rested, but my eyes were wide open and rested on his peaceful face.

My mind was completely blank at this moment, like in a meditative state. Suddenly I was feeling light, free of all the guilt and worries. Having Tyler by my side was strangely beginning to make me feel safe.

"How come you never ask me anything?" I asked him.

Tyler opened his eyes and straightened up with a confused frown. "What?"

"Anything. You never ask me about my past or even the question everyone is curious about, 'who is the father of my child?'."

Tyler just chuckled at me. "Ella, I have nothing to do with your past but I know it's still haunting you. I don't know what it is but I just know that whatever it may be I will keep on protecting you and for that I don't need to know about it." He said.

"I have realized that you are a closed off person. You can't open up easily so I am just giving you the space that you need and want. I know if you feel you can trust me, you will open up to me. Maybe someday, maybe never. I have no hopes." He added.

"Why? Why will you protect me?" I asked.

Tyler just smiled and gave me a shrug in response. "Why are you asking me this?" He asked.

"Because I feel safe when I am with you and I can't understand why? You don't know anything about me. I don't know much about you, yet I feel this way. Why?" I asked.

Tyler just looked at me. His eyes had something in them, some words I couldn't read.

"Maybe because you feel I can be your friend." He said.

"Friend?" I asked with a humourless chuckle. "Having a friend means giving them the right to hurt you, to break you... to betray you."

"That's what friends are." Tyler replied." But they are also who support you, listen to you when nobody does, do silly things with you and give you unforgettable memories."

His words made me remember all the good moments Victoria, and I shared. Her one mistake washed over thousands of good things she ever did to me, and I forgot those things while I was too busy hating her and questioning her intentions.

"She is my friend," I said after a slight pause. "She was my friend," I added.

"Who?"

"Victoria."

Tyler's eyes widened, and he turned around to face me. "You know Victoria from before?" He asked. I sighed heavily and nodded in response.

"Seven years ago I came to Phoenix and that's where I met her. She helped me survive in the big city."