I Lied | BTS

02

No one knew what to say or how to act and that was made clear by the awkward and uncomfortable air. Kangdae, especially, was in complete shock at the turn of events while two of the six members ran off to comfort their emotional elder.

Kyong was kneeling beside Kangdae, hand on his arm and a caring look on his face but he couldn't react and Kyong understood. The man had been trusted with the events of Kangdae's past after years of friendship and he never judged the boy or pushed him away because he acknowledged Kangdae had a life that was more difficult than most and had been dealt with the short end of the stick for most of his youth and even still. 

"I didn't know, I'm sorry." Of course, Kyong knew about Kangdae's past lover and how it ended but he didn't know his name, something which Kangdae would rather keep secret but it was out in the open and there was nothing that could be done.

Kangdae gave the man a sad smile, "It's not your fault." He whispered, trying to keep the tears from falling.

Without much more words, Kangdae was taken to the BTS dorm by Kyong, driving behind the group though three were missing and no one knew where they had left to. The rest of the members were respectful and didn't try to pry information out of Kangdae which he was thankful for. With that being said, Namjoon did his best to make him comfortable in their home.

"You can room with me," Namjoon smiled brightly, that dimple making yet another appearance.

Kangdae nodded, "Thank you, Namjoon."

Slowly unpacking, Kangdae didn't know what else to do with himself.

"We'll get you a bed soon, sorry," Namjoon rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, looking around the room as if it was the first time seeing it.

Kangdae chuckled fondly, "It's fine. I don't mind."

Namjoon sat on the bed and watched Kangdae move from his suitcase to his new dresser with clothes in hand. His almost platinum blonde hair fell in his face but he didn't seem to mind as he let it hang in his eyes which narrowed every few seconds like he was thinking painfully deep. Even if he was older, there was still something about the man that was wise beyond his years.

"So..." Namjoon began, lips pulling back into a straight line as he wondered if he should be speaking in the first place, "you know Jin-Hyung?"

Kangdae froze in his step, back facing the man on the bed. His breath hitched so quietly that he was sure no one would hear even in the silence of the room. Brushing it off, Kangdae put yet another hoodie into the drawer, "I did."

"Were you close?"

"We were." Kangdae bit his lip, trying not to let his voice shake or break and show his true emotions.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Kangdae sighed and turned to look at the expectant man with a soft gaze, he wasn't angry or irritated by the questions, he knew Namjoon wanted to know how he knew his brother and why he was so upset but Kangdae wasn't ready. He shook his head and calmly sat beside Namjoon with considerable space between them, "Not really."

Namjoon quickly nodded, "That's okay, you don't have to."

To think someone could be so accepting and warm in a time so difficult and cold, Kangdae needed that and he was grateful Namjoon was there to be that for him, even if the younger man was a little blindly trusting. Kangdae wouldn't hurt him though, at least, not on purpose.

"Namjoon?" 

"Yes, Hyung?"

Kangdae would have to get used to a lot more people calling him that.

"Why did you welcome me so quickly?" He questioned with a frown, fidgeting with his hands in his lap.

Namjoon only stared for a moment, looking over the confused man next to him as he continued to eye the floor, he did that a lot. "Because you're talented and you're kind. You're a good Hyung, Dae-Hyung."

Kangdae smiled softly, "Well, we'll just have to see about that, won't we?"

The leader left the room as soon as a knock on the door was heard and someone behind it said the others had arrived home. It had been at least an hour since Kangdae was shown his new home and in that time he had continuously thought of the man that had run out in tears because of him, because of his very presence and it brought him so many heavy emotions.

Kangdae could hear their voices down the hall trying to get information out of a still emotional Seokjin and it turned out to be a not-so-good idea as Kangdae listened to the man yelling at the others to leave him alone before stomping down the hall and slamming a door. Perhaps they had never seen him like that before because as soon as he was gone an argument ensued.

Kangdae couldn't take much more and quickly took out his phone and earbuds to blast music at its highest volume, trying to drown everything out. 

It was his fault, he shouldn't be there, he was ruining them.

Maybe if he quit things would be better but he couldn't, he needed the money and even if he didn't he was passionate about music. There was nowhere else for him to be.