I was back on the rooftop. The breeze from the sea touched my face and it was so relaxing. I can see the sun from afar but it seems the weather today is weird; the clouds are gray and the surrounding seems dark.
My fingertips gently touch the flowers as I walk past them towards the wall. When I reached the wall, I closed my eyes and took as much air my lungs could take. The wall reached up to my belly and I leaned forward to look at the grounds. I couldn't seem to see the ground but I knew the hospital building wasn't as high as the buildings behind me. I stood straight, looked out at the sea for a moment then turned around to go back in.
That's when I saw a shocking scene. All the flowers I touched died and suddenly, everything turned dark. I looked up at the skyscrapers in front of me and one by one, small debris was starting to fall off. What's going on? Then, I heard a voice:
Why is it that everything you touch fails?
Why are you not getting what you want?
Rejection after rejection.
You're such a failure.
You're so stupid.
I screamed, Stop! But it continued.
You're good for nothing.
You're a loser.
You're not good enough.
You're just a waste taking up space on this earth.
At this point, I was already breathing so hard. Everything around me was crumbling.
More mumblings. It's getting louder and louder.
I gasped for air. I suddenly sat up from my sleep. I was having a nightmare.
I forced my lungs to breathe normally. As my chest moved up and down, my eyes started to get wet and tears came out rushing. I couldn't stop crying. My shoulders were shaking uncontrollably, and I felt stings of electricity in my fingertips.
Trying to control the trembling, I pulled my legs up to my chest, hugged my knees and leaned my head. It took some time until the sobbing stopped. I felt really tired after the outburst of emotion in the middle of the night.
I should have stayed in the hospital.
I wanted to go back to sleep, but I was afraid I would have another nightmare. I closed my eyes but my mind was wide awake.
YOU ARE READING
The Space in Between
General FictionLiv is chasing death, and Dre is living life to the fullest. She feels hopeless and wants to end everything. He never runs out of energy and is easy-going. Will their Universe align even when they are taking different paths? Will he influence her...
