After Mockingjay- Katniss and Peeta

Chapter 18: Wedding, i'm sorry

Sorry i haven't post lately, but i have been on a camp and i had no internet connection. I'm truly sorry, but anyways, here is the chapter;)

Katniss's P.O.V:

"Mom, i can't go there!" I say to her.

"Katniss, you've promised to be there." She says.

Tomorrow is it the wedding for Haymitch and Effie. I don't want to go.
That would be mean to be able to see "him" again.
I just can't do it.
I can't handle the press.

"Mum, i can't." I say and i feel hot tears streaming down my face.

"Darling, come here." She says and opens her embrace so i can hug her.

I hug her tightly.
Take in the smell from her. It reminds me of my father's smell. The sweet smell and a family and it also reminds me of my childhood.

"Katniss, you have to." She says.

I think for a while. I can't do this, but if i'm just being at the ceremony and then i go home after that.

"But, you promise to be with me, don't you?" I ask her.

"Of course darling." She says and kisses my forehead.

At the way, he, used to.

I make my way up to my rum upstairs.
I put out the dress from the cupboard and lay it on the bed.
It has a light pink color and it's pretty short.
It's a kind of beautiful.
But not on me.

But it's the only one i have and i can't buy a new one now.

At the ceremony...

Mum and i step out of the taxi and walk towards the curch. I'm shaking and can't go straight.
I decided to wear heels, i hate them, but i'm on a wedding. Effie's wedding. And she's gonna flip out if i don't wear it.
And i'm not want to be the one who ruins the day for them.
It's their wedding. Everthing would be perfect.

I walk into the curch and i seeing about 300 hundred people.
Almost everyone are from the capitol.
Typical...

Mum and i find our seats almost in the front.

The wedding music starts and everyone stands up.
I look at the door where Effie and Haymitch gonna come into.
Effie didn't want anyone to hand over her.
She just wanted to be with Haymitch all the time.
The doors opens and they step out in the croud.

I can't help but tears streaming down my face.
This what i wanted.
Marry the man i love. Or loved...

But he ruined it. He just wanted me becouse of my body. Not the love.

I can't wait until the ceremony ends.
I can't be in here anymore.

When they reach the front where the priest stands i see another person.

Peeta.

Right, he is the bestmen.
He looks sick. His face is pale and he yawns all the time.

He may blame himself. He did this, not me.

But inside i feel pain.

Was it right what i did?
Did he did it on purpose that night.
Or was it just a mistake?

I don't know. And i don't want to know either.
He doesn't want me.
He can go and marry another hot girl and just leave me, fine.
But he can't blame me for this.
Or can he?

Mum takes my hand and i squizze it.
I hold her hand all the time.

When it's time for them to say yes i sigh.