We sat in bone fish and grill waiting for our food and drinks. When ended up going to the movies to watch this new movie Linda wanted to watch.
"Yeah and I wanted to get the hair style." I watched Joi and Linda have this whole conversation about nothing.
I loved that Linda loved Joi. So does my mom. She fit into my world so perfectly, she isn't clingy, she trusts me. She isn't insecure and I love that she has her own life. Like I have my life and she has her life and then we come together and everything just works amazingly.
"I can do that for you." Linda's mouth dropped.
"You are lying."
"No. I would never lie to you. I can actually do hair." Linda turned up the side of her lip. "I swear, my hair is never done because I am busy. But- wait I have an idea let me do a style for you tonight and you can see whether you like it enough to let me do your hair for the dance."
"That sound like a good idea but if I don't like it I can tell you?"
"Of course, I would never get mad at you for being truthful."
"Okay, so we can just try something easy tonight. Yeah?" Joi nodded. "When I go to the dance we have to look better then everyone."
"When is the dance?"
"June."
"The 13th."
"Okay so like a prom for the cuties." She pinched Linda's cheek and Linda blushed.
"Here are you guys drinks."
***
Joi POV
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I sighed.
we had got back to the house about a couple hours ago.
Now I am stuck here wondering. I just didn't understand why my mom didn't like me so much. I never did anything to her. I can't come up with any excuse besides the fact that I am fat.
Now I have to go to all of this shit.
I cannot just stay in the house and take and allow he to treat me however she wanna treat me.
That is not how life works. I have to demand the respect that I want. Especially when it comes to my mom because she feels like because I'm her daughter she can treat me any type of way. No. I am not taking that shit from anyone.
* ignore the date in the time and the misspell as you can see it's 3:16 in the morning👍🏽*
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I laughed.
It was just a lot of shit going on.
"You okay?" Jamal walked in the room.
"Yeah, you?"
"Of course. You ready to talk about what happened ear- Joi don't cry." I could stop myself.
I was so tired, on top of the depression that I have already stuff from I have people piling problems on top of me. My mom makes my life way harder than it should be.
" I know. I just would hope that my mom would understand what I am going through by it's like she cares nothing about me." I wiped my face. "she just acts like I am the worst decision or mistake she ever made. It's like everything I do she just hates. How can you hate me and when nobody was here I was here? I lost my father just like you lost your husband."
He laid down beside me and pulled me into his arms.
"Yeah." He spoke softly.
" I didn't kill him. So why do you hate me? There's no reason for you to hate me so much because I am fat. She is so hard on me for no reason." I screamed into his chest just to let off some steam.
"It's going to get better. I have no explanation for your mom and her behavior. But I do think you handled everything the way that it needed to be handled."
" I just feel like I can't keep accommodating to your disrespect and your lack of acknowledgment of me and my feelings because I need somewhere to stay. I would never subject myself to her bullshit again. I may go back I may not but whatever I choose to do is because I want to do it. I would rather be homeless then let her think that that shit was OK. Honestly if she knew who Jordyn really was and how much fucked up shit she did to her she wouldn't be so excited. I'm pretty sure Jordyn has stole Thousands for my mom. She throws these big parties and she is always wearing designer nobody is questioning where she gets this money from. Her mom is a fucking freeloader with no job and so is she but she be designered down the newest bags in the newest shoes. Shit she dressed like you but got no fucking money." He nodded.
" yeah she is always up to season. She be having shit that my mom be saving up to get." He laughed. " even my mom know better than to waste money on half of the shit that she has."
" that is what I'm saying I don't understand how they don't put two into together. Now she's pregnant."
"She is pregnant!" I nodded. "Shut up."
" yeah she is pregnant this is how the whole thing started first she took this pregnancy test in my bathroom and left it laying out knowing that my mom cleans up. So I walk in from school and my mom is automatically yelling at me so I bit it back. I shouldn't have but it's like she was just adamant that it was my test. then after I said it was mine because she was gonna think it was my anyway she told me to get out of her house. More words were exchanged I can't really remember because it was the heat of the moment but she slapped me across my face and then once Jordan realize that it was going too far she finally admitted after me getting yelled at for 15 minutes."
" why didn't she just admit it from the beginning?"
" that's what I was asking myself the whole time I was packing my bag. Then I realized it's a pattern of hers always thriving off of me getting in trouble by my mom because it makes her feel better than me in a sort of way. Anything I do at school she reported to my mom so my mom can get in my ass, she told my mom about you. I genuinely think she likes the fact that my mom will always choose her over me."
" yeah that might stroke her ego."
"I am just gonna figure it out."
"Well you can stay here as long as you need. I talk to momma for you. She said it's fine. She likes you more than me so even if we break up you can stay in a guest room." I laughed.
