Motivation of Memories: The Second Book of the Labors of Love Series

Imposter

Genevieve's POV

My head pounds as I sit here at the breakfast table. I should've drunk my own liquor. Prince and I sit with the lights off, sipping coffee, nursing our hangovers. Ronnie walks in excitedly, turning on the lights. We both squint and groan adjusting to the brightness.

"Sorry, but you'll need the light to see what just came in in the Dax machine." He puts the papers down and I read over them without putting my mug down. Excitement fills me as I realize what I'm reading. They received my signed contract and they're ready to start production. I look over the documents again and again. I can't believe I'm about to go work on a music video. It's really last minute. They want to release it in two months, but when Madonna tells you to get on a flight, you get on a flight. She's set up everything, my plane tickets, my hotel room for the two weeks I'll be there, my meals, and a rental car.

"What's it say?"

"They got my contract. They want to start rehearsals they can start filming."

"I still can't believe you agreed to do it. Do you think everything will look right with only two weeks of rehearsals?"

"She told me her concept and it seems pretty simple. It's not a lot of dancing and the little bit of dancing is pretty simple. It's more so moving her and the dancers around the set." She has this vision for Marilyn Monroe kind of scene. She sent me a diagram of the set they'll be dancing on but I won't know how it will look for sure until I get there.

"She must be writing you a big check for you to be going in blind like this."

"She is, but who's counting? Besides this is my first music video! The exposure is more important." He rolls his eyes taking another sip of his coffee. "What's your problem with Madonna anyway?"

"I took her on a date and she acted miserable. So she asked if we could go to some seedy club in Vegas. I told her I didn't want to go and she got mad a went by herself." He shrugs.

"You dated Madonna?!"

"It wasn't a real date. It was something the record company planned to get my face and name out there." He's silent for a while still adjusting to the bright lights of the room. "When do you leave?" I look at the paper again

"Tuesday."

"When do you come back?"

"Uhhh... three Saturdays later."

"You're only going to be there for two and a half weeks?"

"The itinerary says they have a little over a week to learn and a little over a week to shoot. There are other parts to the video she has to shoot that they think will take longer."

"You up for it?"

"I have to be."

Prince's POV

Her voice trails off and I see her start to disappear behind her eyes.
She was very careful when she signed all her contracts. I was with her for each one and I even brought my lawyer. She's not getting the short end of the stick with any of them but this is the only project with a time crunch. I know she can do it and do it well but she seems really scared.

Dazed, she looks at the fridge and I can almost see the rapid thoughts moving behind her eyes. I move my chair closer to hers and just rub her shoulders. Sometimes when she gets stuck like this she gets really tense from sitting still. Slowly she lets out a deep breath signaling her return to reality.

"Do you want your notebook?" She shakes her head. "Do you need to be alone?" She shakes her head. "Do you want to lay back down?" She turns her head to look at me before nodding. "Okay, mama. Let's go." We make our way upstairs and into my room. Still in our pajamas, we lay down immediately. She curls up close to me and lets out a deep sigh. "It's okay. You're going to be okay." I repeat this to her a few times gently stroking her hair. She just looks at me blankly.

Moments like these end in two ways. She'll either fall asleep and wake up feeling better or she'll just start talking again. She told me she used to go weeks without talking, but in her adulthood she usually comes back after a few hours. I don't know what I'd do if she stopped talking for more than that. I've come to rely on her voice. Her use of gentle words in soft tones is soothing to my inflamed ears. After years of arguing and being yelled at it feels good to just be spoken to. When I leave the studio and all the songs are still playing in my head, her voice silences them even if it's just for a little while. I hope I bring her peace the way she brings me peace. I hope that in these moments when she feels like it's just her and her thoughts that she knows I'm here and I always will be.

Her body becomes still and limp in my arms. Her tight fists slowly unfurl and the knit in her brows disappears. She's falling asleep. She wraps her arm around my stomach as she positions herself. I put my arm around her and kiss her forehead. I'm not going anywhere. I promise.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't still tired from last night but I won't close my eyes until she's completely asleep. I wrap us in a blanket and just lie in bed holding her. Gently tracing circles on her back. Before long, her shoulders relax and the only sound is her gentle breathing.

This must be so hard for her. I couldn't imagine being so overwhelmed that my body just shuts down and it happens so quickly too. One minute she's fine and the next she's spiraling. Her eyes get dark and cloudy. The gold in her eyes disappears. It's as if her inner light is being suffocated by her thoughts. It doesn't happen often and it doesn't happen for long but, I know it must take a lot out of her. It breaks my heart seeing her like that. To know that at any moment she could fade away. That she retreats into her mind and gets stuck there and can't escape the thousands of thoughts swarming within it. I want to take that pain and doubt away. I want her to know that whatever she's feeling she doesn't have to feel alone.

I'm not going anywhere. I promise.

____

Light swirls in front of my closed eyelids. I cover my face with my arm not ready to wake up. My other arm feels oddly cold and I remember that I was laying with Genevieve. Sometimes, to my dismay, she rolls away from me in her sleep. I reach over to her side of the bed but I don't feel her. Sitting up I look beside me. The bed is empty. My eyes adjust to the light quickly as I look for any sign of her. I get up and stretch still trying to wake up. God it's bright in here. I try to search for the source of all the excess light and see the curtains have been opened on the door to the balcony.

Walking over I prepare to close them but then I see her. In pajamas and bare feet she's standing looking out over the edge. I walk out to check on her quietly closing the door behind me. The air is warm and humid just like you'd expect in mid August. I stand beside her leaning backwards on the stone railing. From this angle, I can see her face. Her eyes are low and her lashes are stuck together. She's been crying. The tear stains are gone but I can still see the shine in her eyes.

"W-what if I'm not good enough?" She struggles to get the words out. Her voice is weak and soft, almost gone.

"Is that what you've been thinking about?"

"I have no experience."

"What do you call working on Purple Rain and choreographing for The Revolution and The Time?"

"I-It's not the same."

"Why?"

"This...I-I..." she sighs and she begins to fade away again.

"Genevieve, you've been waiting for these opportunities. You told me all you've ever wanted to do is dance and make choreography since you were a kid. Are you really going to give up your dream because you're scared? Mama, you've been training for this your whole life. Purple Rain was the beginning. The Revolution, The Time that's the beginning. They saw those dances and they liked what they saw. That's why they called and don't even ask what if they don't like you because everyone who meets you does. When you quit everyone was so sad that you left. We all missed you. You're a light in every room you walk in. Don't let fear or anything else tell you anything different." Her eyes gloss over as tears begin to fall.

"I wish you could come with me." Her voice shakes and I can feel my heart shattering.

"Come here, mama." Her eyes never leave the ground as she walks in front of me. I tilt her head so I can see her face. "Wherever you are know you're never out of my reach. Okay?" I seal my words with a kiss, a gentle kiss. A kiss to tell her she's going to be alright.

"Will you help me pack?" She sniffles.

"Of course, baby. Whatever you want."