Total drama pahkitew island

the return of Lamey

I was awoken by Chris's idiotic voice booming over the loudspeaker "Wakey wakey campers! Everyone meet me down by the lake.".

I rubbed my eyes and dragged myself out of my bed.

Max was (For some reason) coming up with idiotic villain names, each more stupid than the last.

Me and Scarlett looked at each other "Working on a new name?" she asked max.

"Yes, I've already got my catchphrase, TIME TO EVIL!" Max replied "But I still require a sinister monocur.". Is he for real?

"They all sound so good, how will you decide?" Scarlett asked. Is she for real?

"Silly girl, one doesn't pick an evil name, the evil name picks you-" Max ran into Topher's back. What is he staring at?

I followed Topher's gaze, and saw what he was looking at. It was Chris without his five o'clock shadow

"Chris, you look... different today" Topher said.

"Just my natural youth shining through!" Chris said.

"No. No, you did something" Topher said "Oxygen sleep chamber?"

"Nope" Chris replied,

Seriously Topher? You're that stupid?

"Hydrochloric acid peel?".

"Nope".

Is it that hard?

"A lasting protein tablets? Antioxidant firming serum?"

"Nope, and uh uh"

I am surrounded by idiots.

"Is this the challenge? We gotta make up kooky words?" Sugar asked, before saying words that didn't even exist. "Great job Sugar!" Ella congratulated "My turn, uhhhh, CAT! Oh, you're so much better at this than I am". Why is she so nice to Sugar?

Chris blasted an air horn through a megaphone "SILENCE!" he yelled "Today we will be laughing at your pain as you risk your lives in the splash, smash, 1-2-3-X dash. Players have to run across the beam, grab a dueling stick, from the end of the dock, and bring it back to your side and place it on your board. Two sticks make an X. Three X's wins the challenge."

Confessional

That seems easy enough *Facepalms* Argh! No! Delete! Delete! rewind!

End

"I have a diabolical scheme for thi-" max began to say

"ANYONE who messes with the other teams sticks will result in them losing the challenge" Chris interrupted. "Never mind" Max grumbled.

"Only one member per team can cross at a time. If you land in the drink, that turn gets you no points, so, use your dueling stick to swat, trip or bat your opponents into the water. This will be awesome to see" Chris says. I'm sorry, but the slotox makes it impossible for me to take him seriously.

"What is your fascination with seeing us hurt each other?" Sammy asked. Jasmine whispered to her to act more like Amy "if anyone gets my hair wet, they're dead". There we go!

"Any particular order we go in?" Dave asked.

"You decide your own order, but every member must go at least once" Chris replied

"Ummm, where's Shawn?" Sky asked. Ohhh, so that's why team maskwak looks smaller than they usually do.

"He probably got lost in the woods. You know how this island can get, confusing. Go find him, will you?" Chris asked Chef. Chef drove away.