Follow the light《Yizhan version》

《Chapter 7: I do care!》

". . . She felt so old, so awfully old and worn, and so young all at once, raw as a wound . . ." 

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Lily's POV 

Wang Zhoucheng was watching me while I closed my eyes, the nightmare of tonight coming up like a blurred memory full of pain. 

The stickiness was everywhere, it was flowing through my body, and whatever I did I couldn't get rid of the horrible feeling that it damped me, I tried to take a deep breath, but I was surrounded by the flowing of the blood, even though it was dark, the red was so visible in front of my eyes, it was blinding me. 

It was everywhere, no matter how I moved it, I turned and twisted, but it kept sticking on my body, the cold breeze of air from outside the window touched my skin while it burned like fire, it burned and burned, and I wished nothing else than to close my eyes and let the pain fade. 

The pain was burning into my skin, almost as if it was skinning me alive, and I tried to scream, but the blood flowed into my lungs, I wanted to close my eyes desperately, but I wasn't able, and darkness and redness of blood were all that met my blurred vision, the blood of my family . . . 

The blood was everywhere over my blood, it even filled my lungs, and I stopped struggling, letting myself soak into it while slowly calming down, the blood became part of me just like the dead, and I stopped moving, the feeling was slowly killing me, but a part of me had died . . . 

I shot my eyes open, remembering where I was while my breath hitched, and both Wang Haoxuan and Wang Zhoucheng turned around to me, stopping their discussion. 

While I felt tears pricking in the back of my eyes, the night they died was the night a part of me died with them, I wasn't who I used to be, and never would I be able to step back to that very same innocent girl, my hands were smeared with invisible blood, and it would be impossible to wash it off no matter what. 

It doesn't matter if you killed a hard-working human or a mafia because, in the end, all that mattered was that someone died in my hands, and that was a fact I had to accept long ago, I eventually knew this day would come, the day I would get caught. 

But never did think that it would take such a twist, both agents in front of me were young, beginning twenties probably, maybe even younger than me, yet they were questioning me, a famous killer, actually the princes of the assassins, they must have made a name on a young age, just like me, but then in a better way. 

And a small smile crept its way towards my lips while I unconsciously shook my head, shaking the thoughts away while both of the men were watching me, none of them talking. 

"Can you please tell us why the white Lotus is seen as different in the community of assassins?" Wang Haoxuan's voice was calm while his big doe eyes watched me through his glasses, and I smiled softly, taking a small sip of my coffee before turning my attention to Wang Zhoucheng, who was ignoring my existence. 

I ruffled a hand through my hair before answering, "the white Lotus is commonly known as one of the biggest and strongest communities of assassins, and so thus hard to take part in, the difference between the white Lotus and the rest of the assassin communities is that we have each other back no matter what happens, we don't spill names, don't ask questions and never ever betray one another. You might think that it doesn't make us different, but let me remind you of a quote, 'no one is a villain in their own story . . .'" Wang Zhoucheng looked uninterested while Wang Hoaxuan nodded slowly, taking notes, while I yawned, even if I wanted to betray the others, which would be impossible because we burnt out original names with our pasts, we hid wherever we went. 

"Then are you part of the community?" Wang Haoxuan touched his glasses while his dark gaze held mine, his eyes were more somewhat grey, grey-brown like an enchanting combination, and I nodded, Wang Haoxuan was asking the wrong questions, even though he was the cautious one of the two, he was asking too narrow questions because I knew Wang Haoxuan wanted answers for the questions he asked wrong. 

"Then tell us why an assassin? You could have done anything you wanted, judging from your looks you could easily have done modelling, actress or an officer may be anything else, why exactly assassin? Why do you want to live your life in full desperation without knowing if you will ever be caught?" Now we talk about interesting questions, I smiled while leaning back in the chair, amused by Wang Zhoucheng's question. 

"You're asking a good question, but you're wrong, why not live the life of an assassin? We have only one life, why waste it to be a good guy when we can be the villain, after all, no one is the villain in their own story, no hero is a hero because in someone else's story the hero can be a villain, so tell me, why shouldn't we live the life of an assassin, and don't give me the loose reactions of, it's too dangerous because life is dangerous, so why not take risks? If the police and government won't do the justice, why should I not make the loose end meet?" They exchanged a glance, they must be thinking I went insane, but I never assured them I was sane though, so I smiled, crossing my legs under the table while slowly sipping my long-gone cold coffee that was musty, and for one moment I longed back to the life I had before an assassin before shaking the thought away. 

That little princess died, who I was today was defined by the actions of my past, I was an assassin, I wasn't a princess anymore, and never would I be able to take that responsibility ever again, I was free now, the whole world at my feet, and I was not gonna back off. 

"Your beloved one, if you're an assassin you're risking their lives," Wang Haoxuan said the words carefully, and I nodded, that exact question was what I expected from him. 

And for a second Tracer's face came up followed by Eliwa's en Qihe's came up before I shook it away, I cared for them, but our beloved ones shouldn't be our weakness, and Tracer had shown it countless time. 

"My beloved ones aren't a weakness, they are my strength, so I have nothing to fear, and those who dare to hurt them would end up eight feet under the ground in an abandoned forest where no one will ever dare to come nor will the sun touch the forest there," for a single second I felt free like the wind before I took myself back to reality, I had responsibilities I should have taken care of first. 

"Is there even a person you care about," it wasn't a question, but rather more a statement of Wang Zhoucheng's side, and I watched how Wang Haoxuan glared at him before turning back to me, something soft visible inside his eyes, but unlike the other people it wasn't pitying, it almost looked like he related to me, and I quickly shook away the thought. 

"Of course, I have people I care about, but that is of no business to you," Tracer, please don't do anything stupid, I prayed softly. 

The remembrance of a bloodbath came up, but all those people deserved to die, they ruined the life of an innocent kid, taking away their happiness, leaving them to their fate to die, they deserved more than death, and I was sure Hell had a special place reserved for them. 

"Then name at least one name," Wang Zhoucheng was challenging me, and Wang Haoxuan was about to poke him if it wasn't for me who came in between with the name of the person I cared more about than the world, the person who I promised to protect, it was the only promise I had ever made, and I would fulfil it. 

"Tracer." 

Word count: 1430 words