"Life is the art of dying . . ."
***
Xiao Zhan's POV
I stared into the mirror, a boy-
No, I saw a young man, wearing a black and white tuxedo staring back, someone I did not recognize even though it was a face that started everyday back into the mirror.
It was a weird thought, to not be able to recognize yourself even if you know it was you who stared back in the mirror because perhaps we don't have a body, we have a soul since a body is only temporary, but the memories we create will always be carried in our unconscious souls.
I deeply sighed while ruffling a hand through my hair in frustration; I didn't even know if this was the right decision to make, but I also trust Yibo even if he wasn't the person he once used to be.
When I assumed I had lost Yibo that day, it was as if I was standing on the edge of an abyss, ready to fall by any soft blow, but I also knew that it wouldn't be what my di di would have wanted.
When I met Tracer the first time when our eyes collided, it was as if a sprinkle of hope ran through my veins, he looked like my di di, but he was different, but even so, to me, Wang Yibo or Tracer was still the very same person I fell in love with, the rest didn't matter.
"Zhan, my dear," my mom's excited voice startled my thoughts while I turned around, forcing a smile on my face, not that she would have seen the difference.
She looked younger than she actually was, as always; this time, my mom wore a little red dress, not too short, but just good and her hair made up, layers of makeup and a fake smile.
I was so tired, exhausted of the lies and sat down on a chair, but my mom smiled at me, praising me for my looks, and I rubbed my eyes tiredly.
"Mom, the accident of a decade ago with the royalties- with my Bo di-" Even before I got to finish my sentence, my mom's eyes turned cold while she slapped me on my cheek; harshly.
Suddenly, the pain rushing to my cheek while I stared at her, frozen in shock, this was a side I never saw from her, and as if my mom finally understood what she did, she placed a hand on her mouth, "so-called-shocked".
"Oh Zhan, I am sorry, it was an accident, you know how I am to that moment, I don't want to talk about it, it was an accident, all of it, it was a murder just like the police said, you shouldn't think about that kind of stuff on your own wedding!" Her voice was sharp as her eyes, and that was when I realized that this was not the mom I used to know; she had changed.
Perhaps it was just me imagining her to stay the same when she turned into a monster together with my dad, but everyone I loved was gone; what could I have done?
At the time, I was also just a simple teenager without power, and where would the reports of children end up at the police station?
With a grudge, I held back a sinister laugh creeping up my throat, "it's okay, mom, but just, please, can you leave me alone for a minute?" Her eyes widened before she gave me an invisible curt nod, turning on her high heels, walking out of the door as if nothing happened.
"Mom, why? From dad, I expected it; he always hit me whenever I wanted to chase my dreams; I accepted that when that happened, you turned a blind eye, but why? Why did you let him do this, mom? Why?" I muttered the words inside my hand while I felt tears running down my cheeks, how I wished this nightmare would stop.
The door behind me went open with a small creek, and I quickly wiped my tears though I was not fast enough because I felt how a pair of strong arms embraced me, placing a soft kiss on my hair.
"Zhan, it's all going to be okay; I love you." He intertwined our fingers while I leaned my head against his chest, Yibo was standing, and I was sitting.
His warm body against mine, and for a long time, I let my tears run, let the pain of years hidden inside me go in a deep breath with my boyfriend holding onto me while he was here, Yibo would stay with me.
I stood up, unconsciously, and buried my face into the crook of his neck, muttering the words we had been exchanging these days to make up for the years we missed, "I love you too, my assassin lover."
Yibo chuckled at my words, stroking my back while his thumb made small circles, calming my heart a bit down while I tried to steady my breath by counting them.
"Will it be okay?" Yibo played with my hair without answering, but I know what his answer was; he was confident about this plan, so I trusted him like I always had done.
***
Here I stood, on the altar, the veiled girl; Hanna, my childhood friend who confessed her love to me long ago while I had rejected her with me.
My heart was racing, and I tried to take a deep breath, chanting the mantra of belief in my Bo di, it will all be okay, soon!
I knew my parents never liked the royalties, especially Lily and Yibo, and I know they always had loved Hanna and wanted me to marry her when I would grow up, but since the moment I saw Yibo, I fell for him and had no eyes for anyone else, only my my Bo di.
My legs were shaking, or so did it felt when I walked up to the altar with my mom by my side, everyone cheering for me; no friends or relatives that I knew where here today, and perhaps it was better this way too.
When I arrived at the altar, I looked around; everything was a beautiful white with red roses jumping out, Hanna who was still veiled, walked towards me with a bunch of flowers, she probably had dreamed of this day, and I felt light-headed suddenly.
Everything, every word, signal, any person was a daze for me; I couldn't realize what happened; it was like a movie, I knew what I did, but it was as if I had no control over my body; as if I was watching an old black-white movie, from afar.
That was until I heard a loud voice; screaming throughout the whole place, making everyone- including Hanna and me, turn their head.
A small kid around a year of 4, wearing a tuxedo, came running towards our way, screaming one particular long word in one breath, "DADDY!"
Before I realized what happened, the little boy was tugging at my leg, his eyes gazing deadly towards Hanna while he started to scream or cry again, "DADDY CAN'T MARRY THAT WITCH, DADDY IS IN LOVE WITH MY FATHER!"
What. Just. Actually. Happened.
Word count: 1223 words
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Follow the light《Yizhan version》
FanfictionA life for a life . . . A human for a human . . . A promise for a promise . . . A prince for a princess . . . And at last . . . The agent for the assassin . . . Cover credits: @alte2003