ONYX MOON

F O U R T E E N

XENOS

"There has to be a way" I muttered to myself as I thought about the predicament I was forced into "I will find a way."

This wasn't just about the gorgeous woman sleeping down the hall in the other room.

She had nothing to do with my feelings about being monogamy and being tied down to one person.

"That's not true" a snide voice whispered in my head "You know the real reason why you can't be with her..."

I shook the thought off, not wanting to touch upon that particular topic just yet.

I just wasn't mentally ready to touch upon that subject right now.

"Look Xen" Zephyr placed an awkward hand on my shoulder that didn't really provide comfort to me at all "From what I remember my mate telling me, her cousin has been waiting her whole life for her Mate."

I looked up at him, noting the seriousness in his gaze.

"Like a really long time" He said sympathetically, well...as sympathetic as he could considering his current stint of emotions "From what I recall, while my Mate was playing with knives and nunchucks, Alessia was playing dress up with her stuffed animals and mother's wedding gown."

"I just can't be that person for her Zephyrus" I choked out, shaking my head "She doesn't deserve the life I would give her."

"You're not your parents Xenos" He squeezed my shoulder once before letting go and heading for the door "You're better than they will ever be."

He shut the door softly, leaving me to stew in my own thoughts.

He was wrong.

I was worse than my father, my previous relationships proved that, and knew that if Alessia ever saw that side of me, the real me, she'd be in danger.

And the worst part was...she wouldn't even be in danger because of the enemies I've collected here on Earth.

She would be endangered because of what I could do to her.

What I would do to her if the monster inside me ever took over control.

Because in addition to my grand ol' daddy's genes, I couldn't forget that I had my mothers too.

A woman that had a collective temper of all those trapped in Tartarus with a penchant for cruel and vindictive punishments and a smile twice as sweet.

A penchant I barely kept at bay (ironically) with the constant consumption of sugary products.

More sugar meant a smaller need to act on my less than saintly desires.

Dark desires that made the most cruelest of men and women flinch away in fear.

Desires so evil and rotten that her pure soul would wither away just at my close proximity.

Regardless of my darkness, I was pretty proud of the progress I've made so far, discovering this coping mechanism of mine all on my own, considering that neither one of my parents would take the time out of their miserable lives to help one of their most valuable assets... despite all the pleas and struggles I suffered at since a young age.

While it's true that I didn't want to end up like my father, a habitual liar and cheater, who I really didn't want to end up was someone like was my mother.

I couldn't end up like her.

My younger sister Phebe was counting on me to be there for her and I'd be damned if I was added to the list of people who disappointed her on a constant basis.

I sat in Zephyr's room for a little longer, trying to organize my jumbled thoughts and feelings.

I needed to figure out what I was going to do and fast, before Alessia Jane could really figure out who I was and what that meant for her.

I had an inkling that she somewhat suspected me as her Mate, the utter look of shock and betrayal giving her thoughts away before she could school her emotions, the moment I laid my hands on her.

I was reliving our first encounter over and over again until suddenly, an ingenious idea popped into my mind.

If I was going to succeed in my plan of distancing myself from Alessia and find a way to unwind her fate from mine, the best possible time would be during this little escapade we were on.

While Zephyr would be searching for his degenerate brother, I could use the opportunity to do a little mission of my own and gather the information I needed to save this unfortunate girl's life.

Because I would save her.

I couldn't fail.

Not again.