A Ray of Hope for Tenya Iida

Goodbye

(AN: This went a whole direction I wasn't planning because I didn't expect to count this many things he would see as mistakes but like, oh well I guess? Also, I'm so sorry if this is insensitive about the topic of self-harm, I'm a former self-harmer, and was told that it wouldn't be insensitive if I wrote it as long as I didn't romanticize it or portray it as a good idea. If anything seems like I am, please let me know so I can change it.)

(Disclaimer: in no way do I encourage self-harm. Though I've done it before, it's terrible for you and doesn't help at all.)

(TW: abandonment, negative thinking, poor eating and hydration habits, poor health, lots of crying, self-harm, blood, descriptions of injury and pain, mentions of infection, death, and murder, swearing and angry speech, and yelling.)

Todoroki's pov: I was just walking around the hallways for the dorms, trying to understand what was going on with Iida and trying to cope with the fact that one of my first friends was leaving so soon, when Iida sped past me, looking like he was deep in thought. I wanted to check on him, but would it be invading his privacy? Well, he walked into his room and left the door open, so I might as well have checked, so I did. I saw him packing up his things quickly, and it was a bit shocking how fast, in fact. It almost looked like he was trying to escape something, if I didn't know any better. Obviously, he wasn't trying to escape something because UA was the safest place for us right now, so why was he trying to leave so desperately? I knew he was upset, a lot of people actually ended up finding out since we could all hear some kind of panic and everyone else was already out of the dorms by then, woken up by the panic. Bakugou left from the group first, following him for some reason, while the rest of us just decided to try to understand what was going on. I wanted to do something to help him, anything, actually. I'd been rude to him recently, if I remembered correctly, and I didn't do anything to help him during his explosive episode. Would he like a hug, maybe? I didn't know how he felt about hugs, though.

"I knew it was a bad idea, I shouldn't have done that, how could I have been so stupid? I'm supposed to be smart and look where that landed me. I got too confident, I trusted myself and my 'friends' too much, trusted my 'family' too much. Now I'm all alone and going somewhere I don't even know with no support, and this is all my fault." Iida spoke quietly, but angrily, and I was very concerned about what he said. Why did he feel like this was his fault? Why didn't he trust in his family and friends anymore? Why did he think he was all alone? Wasn't confidence a good thing? He was smart, why did he say "supposed to"? I wanted to ask him questions, but I knew from personal experience that asking too much or asking certain questions can make things so much worse. He didn't even take too long to pack up all of his things since he was moving so fast, but he looked really sick. He was a lot thinner, too, since he'd been skipping so many meals. If nothing else, I at least had to be a good friend and bring him some food. He wasn't done packing yet, so I had a bit more time to grab something. I grabbed some soba from the fridge that I'd prepared in case someone wanted some, then ran back to his room.

"Iida-" he jumped. 

"Oh, hello Todoroki, can I help you?" His voice was weak, and he wasn't himself. He needed help badly, and I wished I could've done more.

"I noticed you haven't eaten in a while, and you've been working on getting things done for everyone else instead of for yourself, so I brought you my extra soba that I don't need. Here." I handed it to him carefully, but he gave it back.

"That's very generous of you, Todoroki! But I can't accept it, it's yours, and I can't take it from you. Thank you very much, though!" He looked so hungry...

"If you don't eat it, it'll go to waste, Iida, please take it. I can't eat it since I've already eaten and I'm full." I knew he couldn't let anything go to waste because he's all about doing the right thing.