The weight of love

Meeting again (2)

I was eating breakfast, still in my pajamas. I was tired like usual, but I was ready to live another day, even though I was in a terrible mood. My friend had ditched me yesterday evening to go on a date with a boy she had just met and I would have the worst and most boring seminar of the week. I felt like nothing could be worse today. If this seminary wouldn't have been important I would have stayed in bed reading and listening to music all day. But I couldn't and so I didn't.

I got ready taking as much time as possible, without arriving late. I grabbed my keys, opened the door and walked over to the station to get my train towards Nashville.

I had been sitting in the class room for a little less than an hour trying my best to take notes, but my head was exploding, the lack of sleep really kicking in. I felt my phone vibrate in my pockets, I guess I had forgotten to remove the ringtone. I took my phone out to check who had texted me and I held my breath, trying not to make any noises.

Josh's name had appeared on my phone with a text right beneath it: "Hey, are you busy today? I've been wanting to hear you sing and this would be a great opportinity, since our managers said that it would be cool to make some music with our fans. They said something about increasing the views and popularity. I'll send you the adress if you're free" Fuck yes I'm free, I thought, even though I was still at university.

"Sure, but I have only time during the afternoon! Is it alright?" I replied definetely giving up on listening, I was too happy. I'd have to ask a friend to send me her notes but that wasn't a problem.

"Sure! It's my fault that I didn't ask you sooner" It didn't even take him 2 minutes to reply and to send me the address right afterwards.

I spend the rest of my time looking forward to this new meeting, imagining how it would be. Over a month had passed since the concert and he had never texted me. Not that I had expected anything else. I was still only a fan after all. I was sure that he would have replied to my text if I would have sent him one, but I honestly never had the courage. I definetely didn't want to seem ridiculous and the disappointment of him not answering scared me too much.

But now I didn't have to worry about any of this. He had texted me! As soon as the seminary ended I ran towards the door and the bathroom. I washed my face and put some mascara and lip gloss on. I also put some more deodorant on. I did two messy space buns, since my hair was tied up in a messy ponytail before. Thank God, that I had worn one of my favourite oversized T-shirts: it was black with "AC/DC" written on it in red. Underneath I was wearing some short ripped jeans, so I was looking somewhat cute.

The location wasn't too far away from my university, so I decided to walk. I just hoped I wouldn't sweat so much. Half an hour later I had arrived at my destination. I was standing in front of a big, white building that had some plants growing around it.

I didn't really know what to do, so I texted Josh telling him that I was outside. He quickly showed up and walked towards me with a big smile on his face. As soon as he was close enough he pulled me into a hug. It didn't last long since we both immediately let go.

"I missed you Selene!" He stated surprising me. "I literally can't wait to hear you sing"

I probably was never going to get used to his raspy voice and I really hoped I didn't since it made everything he said special.

"I missed you too, Josh" I said chuckling, because I did miss him, but I had missed him before actually knowing him in person. Like Josh once said: meeting fans is like meeting a good friend you've never known.

He wrapped a hand around my shoulders like he did the first night at the bar and walked me to the entrance of the building. I was enjoying this way more than I should.

As we entered their personal studio Jake, Danny and even Sam walked towards me. All of them smiling, seeming happy to see me except the last one.

"Selene!! I'm so glad you agreed to help us out" Danny welcomed me excitedly.

"Im happy you asked me! It doesn't happen every day to have the chance to play with your favourite band." My anxiety was increasing, since I was scared to not live up to their expectations.

During my thoughts and some small talk I looked around. The studio was beautiful, there were as many instruments as I could think of. A white piano on the side, multiple electric and classic guitars hanging on the walls, different drum sets and a bass. There even was a violin somewhere in the room. When there wasn't hanging a guitar there were posters of different artists. From Jimi Hendrix to Foo Fighters. There even was a Led Zeppelin one, which made me silently laugh without saying anything.

"Do we want to start? Wait, you're fine with being filmed right? We though about posting it on Instagram and YouTube." Jake asked. I quickly agreed having expected everything.

"That's my girl" Josh commented, leaning against the wall. I smiled at him amused by his comment.

"Which song do you want to sing? It has to be a song from our band, in case that wasn't clear." Danny asked sitting down, being ready to play.

"I don't know. Does it have to be from a specific album?" I asked while laughing, cause I was clueless.

"Sing whatever you like, love. Maybe your favourite song" Josh tried to help me, but I just shook my head. "I have too many favourite songs from you guys"

"Sing the song you're feeling the most right now. Or one that gives you particular emotions when singing it" Sam suggested surprising me.

"Okay I think I got it" I finally said while nodding. "I'd like to sing "broken bells" if it's okay with you guys" All of them quickly agreed. I chose that song, because it was one of my favorites and I loved the meaning of it. Sam once said in an interview what it was about: "to remove the obligation of generational synthetic expectations”. Meaning that the society had big expectations and stereotypes that were difficult to break and even though we all know this we still sometimes "play the game"

Jake started to play the first notes and I soon joined him. There weren't the drums at the beginning for this song.

"I can see the faces through the broken glass" at the end of the verse I switched to my head voice to give it a more angelic and dreamy tone.

As soon as the  pre-chorus began "I never want to fall asleep" I started to feel the song in my bones and I started to move my arms and hands following the music and my singing.

"When out of silence we will sing, and even broken bells will ring" I definetely had started to get tingles and by the look of the others they did too. I had raised my arms, like Josh sometimes did, still giving it my own touch without seeming a copy of him. The drums had finally joined.

After the second time singing the chorus, Jake's solo started and we both vibed with the music, smiling at each other. I was pretending to have an imaginary guitar in my hand, but he was actually playing. It was heavenly to sing with these geniuses.

As fast as the song had started the last chorus began, my voice becoming more powerful than before, even more raspy sometimes. I decided to finish the song in falsetto to add one more personal touch.

As the song ended I let out a deep breath, still feeling the magic of the music in the air. Plus I knew that I had nailed the performance.

Josh walked over to me taking my hands into his looking me into the eyes. "I expected you to be good but not that good, love. You really touched my soul." He could never imagine how much this meant to me. Hearing this from one of the best vocalists in the whole world in my opinion. I muttered a "thank you" not really knowing how to react, my adrenaline still high.

The next one to compliment was Sam "God Selene, you're an amazing singer. I take back everything I said at the restaurant, that you couldn't sing."

"Thank you, Sam! I appreciate it" The rest of the band complimented me and all of them were sure that the fans would love it.