Avery is now part of the four horsemen. Their one and only goal is to find him. It doesn't seem important to her but maybe it's only because she knows exactly where he is. She has a lot going on and as long as she keeps an eye on Damon and Luke, eve...
He left. He stood up and left me in this burning pool filled with my awful thoughts. If it were him who told me he had kissed someone, my best friend, I think I might have acted the same way. I do deserve this. I just wish things were different.
"Are you okay?" Kai asks, his hand stroking my back. I take a long breath before nodding. Even though that should be enough, it isn't for them.
"Fine" I answer and push away Kai's hand. From across the table, I spot Will's smirk on his lips. He knows I would never betray him. After all, I chose him, didn't I? I never thought of it this way, I realize that even when I was with Damon, Will always was on my mind.
It's always been him.
But the love I feel for Damon, it's different. I think it was meant this way, somehow.
"Avery?" Rika questions and I swallow the lump in my throat. I can't help but think that they know. If they do, why aren't they asking me about it?
"Yes, I am okay," I say as Will sits next to me. I desperately want him to look at me, to glance at me, to do anything. But, he doesn't. I don't blame him, I'd give him the silent treatment, too.
"Alright, let's talk about strategy" Michael is very on board with whatever plan they have going on. Right now, I don't know if he's talking about Seth or Damon.
Neither, maybe.
I doubt it.
"He was talking right?" He's looking at me. I don't know if I should open my mouth, if I have to reply. I am about to expose everything when Will catches my hand and holds it in his. I slightly turn to him and he nods.
They're talking about Seth.
Thank god.
"Do you think you can make him talk?" Michael is once again, staring at me. I nod and I remember, it isn't enough. They actually want to hear me talk. I learned that from Will. Every time we were about to have sex, he'd ask if I wanted this. When I nodded, it wasn't enough. He needed to hear me say the words that gave him permission. I know now that they are all the same.
"I can't guarantee but, yes"
"Alright then, let's go"
We are all standing up, heading towards the elevator. When everyone is in it and the doors are about to close, I catch Will's wrist and pull him back into the apartment.
He's letting me touch him, that's a good sign.
"Did you tell them?"
Will's green eyes are really making me nervous. I stare at them, my heart pounding in my chest. He takes a step forward and snatches his wrist away.
I think I just heard my heart break.
"No"
At least, he's still here. He's not walking away and this time, I wouldn't let him. We're adults, we should be resolving this as so but, I am the one who acted like a fucking baby. God, I feel like I am Rika. I don't like to pretend anymore.
"Why not?"
"Because it doesn't matter"
With that, he walks inside the elevator and I have no choice but to follow. It doesn't matter? Clearly, it does. He's messed up because of it, I am, too. I don't know why I act the way I act when Damon is close, I was thinking maybe he could help me figure it out. Except, I don't need him for that.
Who have I been? I don't need anyone. But of course, that's a lie. I do need him, and I need the four horsemen to be back together. I need my puppets.
"Will, please"
"What? What do you want?" He sounds so hurt, I can't believe I did this to him. I did this to him.
"I love you, please just talk to me," I say, forcing him to turn to face me. I don't like it when we fight. Because we never fight. I guess there's a first time for everything.
"There's nothing to talk about" he's staring me up and down and then, his hands are on my waist. He pulls me close to his chest, close enough so I can hear his heart beating as fast as mine.
"Will-"
"If it came down to it" he starts but is caught off by the sound of the elevator doors. He steps outside, leaving me stunned.
"If you had to choose" he calls over his head, assuming I am behind him. In a second, I am. I take his hand in mine and hold on to him, to everything we have. I can't lose him.
"Between me and him, you'd pick him, right?"
He's not even looking at me when we march outside, into the rain. The water streams down on Will's face and body, and I can feel the same thing happening to me. I like the feeling of it. I'd appreciate it much more if I wasn't so stressed about what's going to happen.
"Wrong," I say, tilting my face up. Standing on my tiptoes, Will faces me again, his face filled with hope and disappointment.
"Really?" Even though his voice sounds so annoyed, he grips my waist and closes the gap between us.
"I'd choose you" I whisper.
He smiles, a smile that I know means I have won. I will never lose him because he's in love with me and I am in love with him.
"I know," he says and as he rubs his eyes, I bring my mouth to his. He doesn't hesitate to kiss me back, if anything, he has been wanting to do this since I came back.
The kiss is hot, there's no other way to describe it. He's gripping my ass and my breasts just before urging me to jump. He catches the back of my thighs and presses me up against the wall. His mouth is urgent and so is he, I can feel him between my legs.
The rain is making this so much better, I don't know why.
Will is unbuttoning my jeans when we hear the sound of Michael's car and Kai's voice.
"You sick fuckers, get in!"
"What? No! My clothes gonna be wet now" Rika complains and it makes Will and I laugh.
"Suck it up baby," Michael says, honking once again.
"I love you," I say.
"I love you," he says. And we keep saying it as we kiss. We are still saying it when Kai is forcing us apart. I am still saying it once we're in the car.
And I know, I have completely fallen in love with him. I wouldn't let Damon kiss me again. Or is that another lie?
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