The Goldfinch (Fanfic)

I - Chapter 12 "Always. Forever"

I

As the dusk sets in slowly, the sky became a battlefield of blue and red, the colors hiding behind behind greyish hallow. And our steps became closer to Boris's house, there it was again, the wide expanse of the desert. The strange allure of the sound of our steps, the crispy sand, battered and fried earlier by the daylight sun. There's always something in it, something beyond, between the rhythm of our steps and our occasional silent stares while walking. 

I was just looking down and thinking, when Boris suddenly stop his pace, and I also stop looking at him.

"Potter?"

"So, what is it? please tell me what's your current job all about?"

"nah, that's not it" He looked at me, it was the first time that I saw this kind of stare, fixed and secure. And then Boris said. "I remember everything on that night, yah know"

I froze and put on a faint smile, the kind of smile we tend to pretend when we blush, somewhere in between the lie and the truth. But before my mouth open to say a few words. Boris suddenly came to me and held me tight, and whisper in my ear. "don't yah worry, it'll be between the two us"

Then at that point, he held me closer and tightly, he hugged me and leaned forward. My face to his face, my eyes to his, gaze to gaze. He pushed forward and I couldn't hold his weight and I lost my balance, so I went down with him. My back was on the desert and he was on the top of me, interlocked with each other as he looked straight to my face. It was semi dark now and no one saw us at that white expanse, besides the sky and the sand and the early stars, only me and him. I didn't care if someone saw us, but I knew it was impossible, the way to his house was this desert expanse that hardly no one ever walks. His house was in the middle of nowhere, the last parts of the Desert End. I knew that expanse, that place, every single inch of it. Only dried rocks, disarrayed pebbles and thirsty sand. While he was on the top of me, we stared for each other in seconds but it felt like longer, perhaps longer than eternity. 

Then in the spark of seconds he leaned his lips towards mine and I responded. Tongue to tongue, and in synchronize rhythm we bite each other under the darkened skies. I recognize the taste. It continued for seconds and minutes, until the time warped and stretch itself, until it became a sudden still. The faint stars also stand still. Everything became so close and intimate as if the dried sand and pebbles and rocks trembled.

I stop suddenly and ask Boris... "Boris, can I?"... then he said eye to eye... "yes you can"... then I found myself licking his ears, his neck, then I took off his shirt. I licked all of it, I remember the taste of sweat, of salt and brine, of his natural essences. My tongue was filled with longing and that longing was fulfilled. My tongue rolled down his pants. Then Boris lay beside me so that I would be in that position. Unzipped the zipper and saw it, his hidden armor, it was hard and red. Ready to attacked, stiff as a cobra.  I licked it and sucked it in rhythm, accelerando, from slow to fast and faster still. I licked every part of it, the tip, the roots, and all the bushes. "Ahhh, uhhhh, uhmmmm" that's the only sound Boris uttered while I was eating the armor, it was faint, as if he prevented to shout it to the entire universe, the Stars and constellations just above us. Then his hands trembled and clinched a handful of sand, his legs trembled, and he shake... then I took it, all of it.

Then Boris suddenly grab me and said... "Potter, now I have to do me revenge"... he licked everything in me, my armpit, my torso, and then he swallowed my hard armor in the same rhythm as I did to him. Boris was harsher but I like it. "Boriss... Borrisss... Ahhh" so that's the music that came from my mouth, It almost took my breath away, my life's energy was swallowed by him. I held his head with my bare hands to guide him, to take it slow, to make it sweet and less harsh. Then I started shaking unceremoniously, it was wild, I was wild. My life was taken away from me, should he stop then I die. Should he stop then I cry. But when I came and he took all of it. His sweet revenge.

II

We lay there for couple of minutes, side by side, I smiled he smiled. Then I looked at him and my hands tried to play with his hair, dusty hair now, full of sand. The sand was in disarray, a witness of our passion. The dusk became a full night. But I can still see him, clearly, clear and clear. I smiled and again and said... "can't this be forever?"

Boris smiled... "always?"

Then I kissed him and said... "forever"

III

As we clean ourselves and started to walk and continue. Boris put his hands in my shoulder. Then I put my head to his shoulder. Then was head straight to his home. Here it was again, the strange allure of the sound of our steps, the crispy sand, like before... Like before... I only wish there's a forever, always is not enough, I need forever. If only it could be forever like this. I would stake my case and drop everything, forget everything, put my heart at stake no matter what it costs. Forever.