You can tell me and Cas did not get enough sleep last night-
I'm sorry for what you're about to read/hj
"Next up for Hermit High's talent show, Zedaph Plays with a poem," announced Mr. Void. The blond walked on stage, he wore a golden suit and purple pants, he was followed by a brunette, a blond with red eyes and another brunette with bright blue eyes, all three of the boys after Zedaph were in sheep costumes.
Zed walked up to the podium and cleared his throat. "Attention everyone!"
He told the sheep to hide. "My love is too strong, you must hide"
"I.." He begins, "Am in love. But.. Not with a human. I am in love with a sheep."
A collective gasp in the crowd followed by Ren screaming, "My fellow sheep sexual!" And then passing out.
"Why does everyone normalize being in love with humans, when sheep are clearly the better species? I would marry this sheep. His name is Tabitha.... And we are going to get married."
The blond, Tango, walks on stage with his sheep costume, "baaaaa."
Zedaph blows a kiss at the sheep, then continues. "This sheep.. it looks similar to Tabitha..WILL YOU MARRY ME SHEEP?"
Everyone in the crowd starts uncontrollably laughing, clearly thinking that this must be the funniest thing they've seen today. Even the teachers are laughing. Doc manages to revive Ren who starts cheering and clapping uncontrollably with joy.
Then, another sheep walks on, this time Skizz, and announces the wedding. "Do you, Zedaph, take Tabitha Sheepy to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"I DO," Zedaph shouts.
The other sheep looks at Tabitha, "and do you, Tabitha, take Zedaph Plays to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
Tabitha says horrified, "I guess? I'm being held hostage-"
He is cut off by Skizz who says, "You May now kiss the man!"
When Zedaph blows a kiss to the sheep, everyone is cheering.
The third sheep, Impulse, is now doing a dance similar to the lady girl in the Never Gonna Give You Up Music Video.
"Thank you everyone," Zedaph says, then bows with the sheep as they all sing Let It Die. Then, they scamper off stage, to uproars of raucous applause.
Mr. Void says, "That was.. the BEST thing I have ever seen. Next up..the dancing red people? This high school is weird."
And now, they look interested, as three people who are painted in BRIGHT RED end up reenacting the Let It Grow music video from The Lorax.
Iskall, xB, and Scar model walk onto the stage. They had to do Let It Grow as their song since apparently Lady Gaga wasn't very appropriate? They are all indeed painted in bright red, only their eyes really tell them apart. That and the fact that one of them painted their nails black since it was all they had. Iskall wanted to kick them out but decided against it.
"Why hallo there unsuspecting people, we are the Dancing Red People since we couldn't think of a better name. We will be dancing to Let it Grow from The Lorax," Iskall begins.
"Though I'd personally say I'm the best one here," says xB.
"Let's not forget you almost painted your nails GREEN! It would have ruined the whole dance."
They begin doing dances, and everyone is head bopping like crazy, to the point where Ren's head specifically looks like it's about to fall off. You can see the sheep in the audience who are also vibing to their amazing song choice, and their amazing dance moves. xB is now breakdancing, and Iskall is glaring at xB like he wishes for xB's head to instantly fall off. Iskall is the leader, after all. Scar is cheering on xB's breakdancing but stops when Iskall glares at the American.
Iskall finally stops glaring and they do the beautiful end move, where Scar and xB are supposed to hold Iskall up while he twirls due to him being a dainty princess but Scar trips and they land in a heap. Everyone is still clapping vigorously, and Iskall is twirling once he recovers from the fall.
Cub stands up cheering on the three before him and Scar screech in unison, "CONVEX! CONVEX!"
Iskall shoves Scar off the stage, bows with xB, and then the curtains close. But just before they close, Iskall is visible still and shouts, "I am the daintiest in all the land!" Then scampers off into the crowd. He meets up with Stress who gives him a hug.
"You did amazing!" She grins, ignoring the fact that she's covered in bright red paint from the hug. It kinda looks like she stabbed somebody and blood just poured out in the shape of a person.
Iskall, who is lowkey still pouting about the fact that they couldn't dance to a Lady Gaga song, says, "Thanks I guess. I'm still mad I couldn't dance to Lady Gaga."
xB walks up to Hypno and Keralis, Keralis gives xB a high five and Hypno tackles the brunette.
"You should have done a Lady Gaga song," states the dirty blond.
"We were going to," xB says, "Mr. Void banned it."
"Awwwwwwww," groans Hypno, then he smiles, "No one's stopping me from walking onto the stage and singing it."
Mr. Void concludes the show, "That, everyone, was our beautifully weird Hermit High Talent Show! I, Xisuma Void, as judge will decide who the winner is." Everyone stares at Mr. Void, holding their breath, waiting for the announcement.
"The winner is... Ren, for doing absolutely nothing. Your passing out was truly filled with so much talent," Declares Mr. Void. Everyone is shocked, they all slowly turn their heads to face Ren. Ren lets out a screech of joy. They all run after Ren, some anarchy screams are let out, while poor Ren is screaming for his life.
THE END... (for now)
This was a Collab with:
ThatOneCandor
YOU ARE READING
HermitCracc: Hermits on crack done right
FanfictionWeird wacky stories that come from the brain of @ThatOneCandor and I. Cover by @ThatOneCandor
